Clyde, the monkey man.
That’s the nickname the kids at school had given him, and by the look of him now, he had truly lived up to his namesake.
I stood on the inside threshold of my home, and he stood on the outside.
His hand was still stretched out, mid pose, from where he had been knocking.
I pretend not to notice the thick, black hairs spread over his arms and hands, sprouting up over the neck of his t-shirt.
Hadn’t this guy ever heard of a wax? Or at the very least, hair removal cream?
I couldn’t think of what to say.
It had been an age, longer, since I’d seen him.
We were both losers in school, so we sort of stuck around each other, if for no other reason than we had no one else.
It didn’t mean we had been friends, though. Far from it.
I spent most of my time with my head in comic books, while Clyde, well he had other hobbies he preferred.
Mainly, he was into anything to do with apes and monkeys.
He read about them, drew about them, he even acted like them sometimes, which looking back is equally horrifying and embarrassing for a 14 year old boy to do. No wonder we had been picked on, we had really made ourselves pretty easy targets.
Clyde was the one to break the silence. He gave an awkward, toothy smile.
“Pratt, hi. I was just in the neighborhood, if you’d believe.”
I didn’t, not really. But at the same time, it didn’t matter much, either way.
I had nothing going on, was recently single after a break up. I was in between napping and gaming all day, every day.
At least his visit had broken the mundane groundhog day I had been living in.
He was obviously here for a reason, why did it matter if he wasn’t upfront about exactly why he had turned up unannounced.
He’d always been a bit strange, it wasn’t unusual behavior from him.
I stepped back to let him inside, and went to the kitchen to grab us a couple beers.
Sure, it was only 12 in the afternoon, but a few couldn’t hurt.
It was a catch up with an old acquaintance, after all, and that was a cause enough for a celebratory drink.
I could feel Irene’s eyes bore into the back of my head as I grabbed the beers.
I couldn’t see her, but I could feel her hateful stare, full of disgust and anger.
“Can’t help yourself, can you? Any excuse.” her voice was accusary, but also gleeful, as if she had caught me out doing something wrong she’d known I’d do.
I spun around, ready to tell her off, to tell her it was actually a celebration drink - thank you very much - if she must know, but there was no one there.
It took me a moment to remember that we had broken up a little while ago.
Man, I need a decent sleep! I thought to myself. I was so exhausted I was hearing things! Or maybe it was the guilt that Irene instilled in me every time I so much had a sip of alcohol. Maybe it was my trauma, coming through to rear it’s ugly head.
Clyde had made himself at home, he was sat scrolling through my computer as I came back into the lounge room.
I waited for a joke about me getting lost in my own house, but nothing came.
Obviously Clyde had been busy as well, too busy to notice how long I’d taken.
“Look, come see.” Clyde called me over to show me the computer screen, excitement rising in his voice with each word.
I glanced at the screen, and saw i was looking at a room filled with all differrent types of monkeys, some large and mean looking, others tiny and nimble.
The small ones were working, it seemed, scrambling around frantically collecting stones and leaves, while the bigger monkeys watched on, seemingly chatting amongst themselves.
“Cool.” I muttered, even though I didn’t think it was. I already bored with this conversation, thank god for the beer in my hand. “I see you haven’t changed, still got a love for the monkeys, hey?”
Clyde spun the computer chair around so he was facing me, a huge smile plastered on his face. “Are you kidding? Of course! In fact, I’m not just in ‘love’ with them, these days, I’m working on my own stuff, my own research.”
“I had no idea you got into college, that’s awesome man.” I admit I am jealous for a moment, wondering where I had gone so wrong. Maybe if I had - but before I could finish my thought, Clyde spoke again.
“I didn’t get into college. And besides, even if I did, mama would’ve never afforded it. No, I’m just working on my own thing right now. But one day, it’ll be massive, what my research discovers, you’ll see. They’ll probably teach about my experiments in class, even.”
Okay, so he was still a massive weirdo, he was just the grown up version now.
I just nodded at him, sunk back into the couch and downed the rest of my drink.
We talked for a bit longer, then Clyde announced he had to go.
He told me he was staying over at his mother’s place, and invited me to come over for dinner the next evening.
I tried to think of an excuse, any excuse, but then I heard Irene’s voice in the back of my head, mocking me for being that same old, alcoholic, friendless loser.
So I decided to go to dinner, prove Irene’s taunts wrong. I thanked Clyde for the invite, and showed him to the door, telling him I’d see him tomorrow.
His smile was so bright, so happy, it almost looked painful.
I had only been to the Fletcher home once when I was a kid.
It was one of the biggest homes in town, old, dilapidated even back then.
Everyone in town knew that Clyde’s daddy had walked out, leaving just the boy and his mum all alone in this big massive house.
Standing infront of it as an adult, it didn’t look as if it had faired well over the years.
Broken shutters lay on the ground under windows, paint peeled off, revealing the rotting wood underneath.
The front gate was broken, off its hinges, the weeds almost as tall as me as I weaved through them and made my way to the porch.
I knocked on the door, but it was already unlocked, already open.
“Hello? Clyde?” I called as I stepped inside, floorboards groaned underneath the weight of me as I walked through the foyer.
I didn’t smell anything cooking, so my nose couldn’t lead me to the kitchen. I stood awkwardly for a few moments, pondered my next move. I knew Clyde’s mum would be quite elderly now, I didn’t want to Walk around and scare her.
After waiting another few minutes in the eeirie silence, I heard noise. Some banging, and then a metallic squeal, it sounded like a door closing, chains rattling.
Clyde appeared at the top of the stairs, red faced, looking disheveled.
His thick black hair was curly, damp with what looked like sweat.
I wondered if I’d just caught him finishing up a home work out. Not that he was ripped or muscley, far from it. But I suppose everyone had to start somewhere.
I thought to myself to make sure I asked him about it later. Maybe working out would be good for me too. If Clyde could do it, I certainly could.
“You’re here!” Clyde sounds surprised, but pleased. “Let’s have some dinner first, and then I’ve got something really cool to show you.”
I held back rolling my eyes.
I knew that the monkey madness would be apart of the meal, spending time with Clyde it was a given where our conversations would lead. But still, I hadn’t had a home cooked meal for ages, surely I could put up with a bit of bullshit for just one night, to get a decent feed if nothing else.
Clyde led me to the kitchen, which was just as in ruins as the rest of the home.
Dishes, thick with mold, lined the bench tops, garbage over flowed from the bin, giving off that sweet, rotten scent of decay.
“Um, it’s a bit of a mess.. Mama hasn’t been feeling too well to keep up with house work. You know how it is.” Clyde mumbled.
I smiled back through gritted teeth. The idea of a home cooked meal had gone the instant I stepped foot in this room, replaced by the need to vomit.
“It’s.. Fine. Why don’t I order us a pizza?”
Clyde looked upset. “There’s stuff in the freezer. Stuff mama made, before. I can just reheat that up.”
There was no way I was going to eat anything that came out of that fridge or freezer. Not unless I wanted a severe Bout of food poisoning.
“And plus, the pizza shop delivers beer too. I forgot to bring a case, and I’m sure your mama wasn’t much of a drinker, was she? You know me Clyde, it’s not a proper meal unless I’ve got a beer to wash it down with.”
For what felt like the first time ever, my love for alcohol had helped me out of a shitty situation.
Clyde’s expression softened, and he nodded his head in agreement.
“Well, you’re right there, Pratt. Not a drop of alcohol in this place. Better call up and make an order. I’ll take a pepperoni.”
We took the pizza and beer outside when it arrived, and I couldn’t recall a time when the fresh air had felt and smelt so good.
I asked him if his mama was going to be joining us for dinner, but he shook his head.
“She doesn’t have much of an appetite these days.”
I understood, I didn’t know a tonne about elderly people, but I knew it was a common thing for their appetites to slowly shrink.
“Cheers.” I said, and Clyde and I clinked our glass bottles together.
We ate and drank in silence, taking in the sounds and sights of nature, admiring the sun that was beginning to set.
After we finished eating, I rolled a smoke while Clyde went to fetch us another beverage.
I was glad I’d come, despite the initial oddness of the house, how gross it was. Clyde was a weirdo, there was no doubt about it. But he was a good guy, at heart.
“Come on, Pratt. I really wanna show you what I’ve been working on.” He passed me the beer and I took a swig while I crushed out the cigarette.
I followed him back inside and this time we made our way up the stairs, in the direction I had seen him come from when I first arrived.
I half expected to see a home gym set up, maybe a treadmill and some weights. But it wasn’t anything like that. It wasn’t.. Anything I had ever seen before.
It stunk.
And not like a smell I could put my finger on either, it was like a mixture of animal, shit, spew, decay. I couldn’t tell where one scent ended and one began, it was all merged into one.
Thick metal crafted into cages lined two walls, and inside were people.
Or things that had been people, once upon a time.
6 cages, 6 people, in varying degrees of transformation.
Some were totally covered in the thick black, curly hair that Clyde himself had.
Yellow eyes, sallow skin, what you could see of it, under all that hair anyway.
They moaned in pain, looking lethargic and extremely unwell.
Others were not so bad, they had more energy, and were crying and begging to be let out, banging on their cages with a terrified fury.
The hair on them was mainly on their arms, not covering their face and body like the others had been.
I turned to face Clyde, who was positively beaming with joy.
“So, what do you think?” he asked, pensive with excitement for my response.
I stared at him, dumbfounded.
“What.. What the fuck is this, Clyde? What have you done?”
“They’re the experiments, silly. What are you talking about? Look, see how they’ve adapted? It’s incredible.” His gaze drifted over the cages, a proud grin on his face. “This is my life’s work. But, theres more. I saved the best for last, Pratt. I wanted to make it really special for you.”
I want to leave. Walk out the door. It’s what I need to do, it’s what I should do.
But, for some reason, my legs start to feel like lead. They’re so, so heavy. My whole body feels heavy. And then I fall.
“You.. You drugged me?” my vision is blurry, but I can just make out I’m sitting at the white table. To my left, I can see someone sitting there in my pherifierals. I can’t quite make them out, just that they’re small, and dark.
“I’m sorry, Pratt. I didn’t want to. It’s just easier, for all of us. Resistance can get.. Messy. Now I know you’ve just woken up, but don’t be rude, say hi to mama.”
My breathing quickens when I realise he’s referring to the figure on my left.
That was his mother?
I thought it was a mannequin, they hadn’t moved a muscle, or even spoke a word.
“Umm, hi, Mrs James.” I murmur, but the figure doesn’t reply. They don’t turn in my direction or acknowledge me in any way.
“Mama ain’t much of a talker, these days. She prefers to just sit and watch me work, don’t ya Ma?”
Again, the figure doesn’t reply.
And after my eyesight returns to normal, I see why.
She isn’t alive, or not in any way that matters at least.
Her body is covered, head to feet, in the thick black fur. Her eyes are open, unblinking, shining an eery bright yellow gaze at the spot on the table she stares at.
I need to get away, I need to get out of this madhouse and get help for those.. Things, upstairs in the cages.
“What are you going to do to me?” I am crying but I don’t want to be. I can’t help it.
“It’s just some medication, nothing crazy. Gee, you’re really acting like it’s a big real. Just chill, I’d never do anything to hurt you, Pratt. You’re my friend.”
I glance at his mother again. Mm, his definition of hurt, and my definition were quite apparently not the same.
“It’s a new formula I’ve been working on, it’s going to make the changes a lot quicker and hopefully, a lot more sustainable. And then, once that’s all kicked in, I’m going to take you down to the field, introduce you to the others.” He has his back to me, writing notes erratically in a notepad.
“So.. So you’re going to turn me into a money?” my voice breaks, I can’t really comprehend how a few slices of pizza had turned into this.
Clyde turned back to face me, he gives me a look of disappointment and shakes his head. “Oh, don’t be silly, Pratt. You watch too many movies.”
“Okay, you had me going. For a moment there, I thought you wanted to like turn me into a monkey, or something.” Sweat beaded at my forehead, ran down my face.
Clyde laughed, heartily, cheerfully. “Oh man, now that would be crazy! Could you imagine?” he composed himself after a while, and shook his head in affirmation. “That would be crazy dude! I don’t think it’s even scientifically possible, you know, it’s never been actually achieved to actually turn a human into a monkey? No, what I want to do.. Well for starters, it’s proven to work. So there’s that.”
Any tiny sense of relief I had that I was going to be able to talk my way out of this, had began to slink away again.
Slowly, slowly, until I was drowning in terror.
He really was insane.
I tried hard to keep my voice even, I really did. But the moment I opened my mouth to speak, the tears came, hot and heavy. I blubbered and babbled my way through my question – if he wasn’t going to use DNA to turn me into a monkey like he had been attempting to do with the other.. ‘subjects’, what was he going to do?
How was this a proven science experiment? Why did he need me?
He looked hurt at the last question.
‘I chose you, to help you. What do you think? I mean, look at the apartment you live in,” he sighed, “look at your whole life. You’ve got nothing now, and you most likely never will. You’ll always be that loser from school, it’s just who you are. But, I can help you. I can change all that, Pratt.”
I think about my life and he’s right, it’s pretty shit. I don’t have a girlfriend, I drink most days, mostly all day. I don’t have a job, or any friends. Well, ones that weren’t crazy scientist wanna be’s, anyway.
But still.. it is my life, and I didn’t hate it, not at all. Sure things weren’t perfect, but I knew that if I wanted too, I could change it.
I guess I was just comfortable, but it wasn’t too late. I could get a job, stop drinking. I still had hope for myself, I realised then. Something I thought had all been forgotten, but it turned out it was just hiding for a time, ready and waiting to come to fruition when it was needed most.
“What happened to your.. Other, ah, subject? The one you sent out.. To the field. It was successful, I’m assuming, as you said this thing is, uh proven to work.” I needed to buy time, as much as I could, while trying to work out a plan with my alcohol scattered brain. It was hard, nearly more effort than I had in me.
I was glad I’d been able to sober up a bit from the beers and whatever drug he’d given me, but my head was still pounding like a boom box.
“Oh she was amazing, absolutely. Yes she reacted really well to the medication, that’s why I chose her. She reacted much quicker than the other subjects still up there, and was about to complete the second phase of the experiment, but.. There were complications. Nothing to do with the experiment of course! I mean, you’ve seen the others.. And they’re fine.” He said quickly, as if hearing that would quell any worries I may have had.
It did not.
Clyde smiled sadly as he continued on.
“I didn’t know at the time, but when she.. Came to work with me, she was pregnant. Apparently she didn’t know either, but that’s debatable considering the amount I was paying her for taking part in my experiment.. Anyway.
We found out during tests I was completing for my research, and by that stage she was about 7 months along. Hardly showing. She had been thin when she first came to me, and she still was. I thought the tests had to be wrong, so we did them again. But they weren’t wrong.
She carried on with the medication, everything was fine. And then.. And then she went into labor early. She was out in the field, with the others. And I didn’t, couldn’t know.. By the time I realised something was wrong.. It was much too late.
They’d taken the baby, thinking it was one of their own, you see. And EXP1.. They thought, they assumed, she had been the one to take the baby from them. And they were just protecting their own, you see. They’re quite wonderful, that way.”
I stare at Clyde in horror. I can’t fathom his words. His demeanor is all wrong. It doesn’t match what his mouth is saying, because he’s jovial, smiling.
He spoke again, oblivious to my open mouthed stare.
“The DNA, of course it had transferred to the child from the mother. If we had considered that possibility before, all of this could have been avoided. But alas, here we are. That’s why I needed someone else for EXP2. My other subjects weren’t developing at the rate I needed. And I just knew you would be perfect.”
“And.. The baby? What happened to the baby that was born early? The monkeys just took it in as one of thir own?”
He seemed surprised by my question, his eyebrows knitting in confusion.
“No. Did you listen to me before? You can’t just use DNA to make someone a monkey. Well, I haven’t found the way yet to make it 100% anyway. Yeah the kid had some monkey DNA, but he was also human. The monkeys aren’t stupid. As soon as they found that out, they discarded him. I found him, oh about a week later, I’d say. And you know, it was a real shame. I’d have loved to do some experiments starting on someone so young. To see what I’ve created, through young and growing children, now that would be something else.”
I can feel the panic rising in me, I don’t know what to do.
I’m trapped. Restrained.
My mouth is so parched. I need a drink.
“Any beers left? I could really use one.” I force a smile, hoping he will see I’m trying to play nice, that I’ve accepted his plan.
If I’m going to be one of his experiments, I thought to myself, I may as well be wasted while it happens.
At hearing my request, Clyde’s shoulders sagged with relief. He had been tense, gauging my reactions, waiting for me to put up a fight, not that I was able to do much, in a physical sense anyway.
“Of course!” his smile was relaxed, gentle. “I’ll go grab you a couple.”
When he left the room, I looked around, noting the window, noticing the bars on it, to stop anyone from breaking in, or in Clyde’s case, more like stop anyone from breaking out.
A glare of sparkling silver caught my eye as I scanned the room, a small pair of letter openers, sat upon a messy desk in the far corner. My hands were restrained, bound together with a thick rope, but I was able to grab them off the desk and slide them into my trousers. I was siting in the same position when Clyde returned. He never so much glanced at the letter openers to see if they were still there.
He just handed me a beer, and guestered for me to put my hands out so he could untie them.
I did as he had asked, hoping he couldn’t see my hammering heart through my t-shirt.
“Im really glad you came around so easily. I was sure I was going to have a fight on my hands, you’ve always been a bit hot headed I remember back from school.”
I crack my beer, take a long swig.
It is the best thing I’ve had drank.
“What you said, well it really resonated. My life is pretty shit.” I downed the rest of the beer in another long drink, placing the empty bottle back onto the table infront of me.
Clyde nodded at my response, as if it made perfect sense. He was happy I was going to be part of his life’s work, he told me. It was something wonderful we could share together.
He was still chatting, a dreamy and excited smile on his face, when I leapt up and stabbed the letter opener into his neck.
He gave a gasp, his hands reached up to mine, to try and pull them away from him, but I didn’t let up my grip.
His eyes darted around the room wildly, and I knew he desperately wanted to speak, but he couldn’t.
All he could do was gurgle.
I pulled the letter opener out, watched as the spray of blood from his sliced artery sprayed across the room, onto the wall, onto the roof. He did a strange sort of dance, his body giving up, and within a moment he had fallen to the floor, where he laid, eyes open and glassy.
Before I left, I checked his mother, or whatever she was now, I felt a pulse. Slow, but there.
I called an ambulance before I left the house, not explaining anything, just reiterating the fact they needed to get out here, and fast.
I wasn’t too worried, not about the killing of Clyde. It was self defense, if it ever came down to it.
But I knew I hadn’t ever been in trouble with the law before.
If they looked, and found my DNA, there was nothing in the data base it would be a match too.
But somehow, I thought the police would have much more on there plates to deal with after arriving here, catching the killer of a mad scientist, would possibly be the last thing on their to do list.
I’d done the world a favor, really.
But I don’t think I did myself many favors, though.
It’s been three weeks since that night at Clyde’s, and while I’ve heard nothing from the police, I kind of wish I could talk to Clyde again.
My skin has been sprouting new growth, that thick black hair. I’ve shaved, I’ve waxed.
It doesn’t matter what I do, not even a few hours later, and it’s back.
And this morning, I was brushing my teeth in the bathroom sink, and when I glanced at my reflection in the mirror, I saw my eyes.
They aren’t blue anymore.
More a greeny shade of yellow.