It started when I was only six years old. It was 9 o’clock and my grandma was cooking my favorite apple pie in the kitchen. “You can’t eat this tonight or you’ll never be able to sleep. This is for tomorrow.” She scolded me when I tried to wait for her to finish, my feet swinging from sitting on a high stool. “Please go to sleep, Jia. What did I tell you?”
I pouted and crossed my arms. “Never stay up too late or the monster will get me.” I turned around and plopped on my stomach on the wooden chair. I heaved myself up and then let go, bouncing on the cold tiles. “But they’re not real.” I gave her an accusatory glance.
Grandma’s eyes were soft on me but her next words made me shiver, “I’ve seen it, little one. Once you do, you’ll never want to open your eyes again.” I felt my body freeze and I swore my heartbeat drummed in my ears almost like I was hearing them with headphones on. Grandma never talked about monsters from her perspective.
She must have seen panic on my face because she knelt down and patted my head. “Don’t worry. They won’t get you as long as you sleep early. Now, go on.”
My lips trembling, I stepped back and nodded. My six year old self must be so stubborn and so scared because I didn’t rush to my bedroom, shut the door, turn off the lamp and close my eyes like I was supposed to. Instead, my feet took me to the living room, I set my butt on the leather couch and turned the television on. Pressing mute, I stared at it.
Spongebob was playing and I kept laughing silently, afraid grandma would hear me. It must have been almost midnight when the hairs on my neck stood up. I froze. “Grandma?” I called out, but I knew she already went to bed when the lights from the kitchen turned off a long while back. Her room was on the other side so she didn’t need to pass by the living room. She didn’t know I was wide awake, bingeing on Spongebob Squarepants. I blinked.
A slight noise came from the kitchen, like a gurgle of something, someone? Now apprehensive, I felt for the remote on the couch, my eyes never leaving the now dark kitchen. I blinked.
A shriek escaped from me involuntarily when I heard the faint sound of teeth gnawing coming from my right side. My body felt cold as if my blood turned to ice. The remote dropped to the floor as I looked down to my shaking hands. Slowly, I turned to where the noise came from. The window on the wall had a flimsy white curtain, and there was no mistaking the form of a woman standing outside the house.
My mouth parted, but no sound came out of it this time. It was as if I was pulled down heavily by gravity, my voice was being kept in a box somewhere I couldn’t reach no matter how I envisioned myself calling out to my grandma, to anyone for help. I blinked.
That was when finally my scream let out. I closed my eyes and pulled my covers all over my body. I felt hot tears let out all the way to my cheeks and neck. I kept my eyes shut feeling something breathing on my left side.
I saw it, in my peripheral vision. The woman was at one moment behind the curtains and next on my left, hovering over me, staring at me, her mouth wide agape like she was screaming, but instead I only heard her raspy breathing together with the teeth gnawing sound.
Loud hurried footsteps resounded in my ears and a pair of hands gripped me as I pushed them away, screaming and crying like a baby. “It’s me. It’s grandma! Don’t open your eyes!” She shouted over my screams, desperation evident in her tone. “Calm down, love. You’ll be fine. Just don’t open your eyes.” She whispered, now that I have stopped screaming. I felt her arms surround me, comforting me, the blanket still all over me separating her warmth.
“Grandma.” I murmured, my words muffled in between the sheets and her chest.
My racing heartbeat slowly waned into a calm dissonance. “No matter what you do, don’t open your eyes.” I nodded. Her grip on me slackened and I felt her lean back away from me. “Now, where did you last see her?”
I knew without a doubt who she was talking about. “On my left side. She’s-” I sniffed as I tried to frantically move closer to the couch. If it could swallow me, it would be better at that moment. “I didn’t see much of her, but her mouth was open, and I could still hear her breathing.” Tears slipped from my eyes. The sound of the woman’s shallow breaths petrifies me. Every time she inhaled, I couldn’t help but cry, silent prayers escaping my mind into the void.
My grandma shifted and laid down beside me. Now instead of the woman’s breathing, I hear my grandma’s sigh. “Jia, listen carefully. She’s a curse that’s been sent to our family a long long time ago. This isn’t the time to talk about it, but know that you need to sleep, and not once, should you open your eyes until she’s gone, until I say so.” I nodded again because what could a six year old child do?
That moment haunted me until this very day. I am now twenty-eight, and I managed to survive all these years. After grandma’s words that night, I didn’t know how I successfully drifted off to fall asleep. It must have been the exhaustion or my body finally tiring out, but morning came, and she was gone. The monster, the woman, was gone.
My grandma then had sat me down and gave me a set of rules to follow, she recited the following:
I sighed, remembering. My hands gripped my sheets tightly, accepting my fate as I heard the hiss of flames surround my apartment. I was on my back, the life I’ve lived felt so distant. I cringed at the heat as the fucking truth hit me. I am going to die by burning alive. Because as loud as the sirens are outside, the screams of help from the people in my building, the crackling of fire threatening to swallow me all around me, they don’t terrify me as much as the sound of her gnawing teeth in my ear. They don’t petrify me as much as her shallow breaths touching my cheek. Somehow, with my impending death, I sat still. I won’t let her win.
“What happens if she gets to me? What happens if I don’t know it’s my last blink?” I remember the question I asked my grandma that pivotal morning.
“She takes you to hell with her.”
I am now typing on my phone as I see the flames crawling slowly to my spot. I could see her from my peripheral vision, mouth still open, hollow eyes rooting me. Like years before, I am being pulled down unnaturally heavily by gravity.
Before I press my eyes shut one last time, I hope someone can read my story, know that she’s still out there, haunting my bloodline. To hell with you.