Ever since I was a child, I wanted to feel special. As if I meant something in the world.
I’ve always been second-best in everything I’ve done, and I’m not sure I’ve ever won anything in my life. I was always bullied from a very young age – I’d often curl myself into a ball in a quiet corner and wish under my breath: “I wish everyone would just leave me alone! Just leave me alone!”. Just once. I would have done anything to feel important or unique, just once.
I want you to hear my story.
It was a day just like any other day. I had woken up late, just like always. I scrambled around on my bedside table hunting for my phone – Bleating incessantly at me for attention. It was my alarm. After throwing a dirty red t-shirt and last night’s take-away dinner onto the floor, there it was. It was a struggle to turn the alarm off – My brain was dull and painful after a long night drinking with my work buddies down the pub on the corner of the town’s main road. It felt as though every movement, every blink of my eye, every synapse firing in my brain, was sending jolts of pain through me.
Gazing at the phone’s screen in a daze, I could see that it was midday. My mind started working – Although it felt as though my brain was a dusty old filing cabinet, with half of the records mysteriously lost in a fire. I couldn’t remember why I had set an alarm, until I started to recollect a drunken conversation I had with my best ‘work friend’, Paul. Paul was the only person I could bare to socialise with on weekends, outside of office hours and the utterly regimented ‘Friday Night Drinks’ to collectively forget about the week that had just gone.
We both bonded over our mutual love of classic horror movies. While we differed on exactly which one was the best (The best horror movie is clearly ‘The Shining’. Paul’s favourite ‘Night of the Living Dead’ is in the top 5, but not even close), we would often hang out at each other’s house on a Saturday night and watch until the early hours.
Today would have been no different, except we had spotted something online that we couldn’t resist:
‘Horror Fest’ – An all day and all night showing of the greatest horror movies ever created. Get your tickets now at the Gala Cinema on Kings Road! Starting at 1pm and running until 1am.
In our infinite drunken wisdom, we had decided that we had to get there early to watch the whole collection. The cinema had been there for years, and we imagined was on the verge of going out of business. The seats were all dusty, the popcorn always had this indescribable stale taste and the floors were so sticky that if you weren’t careful you would leave one of your shoes behind.
At the bigger chains, the worst thing about the cinema is……you guessed it, other people. They just distract you from the screen, and annoy you to no end! Despite all the short-comings of Gala Cinema, it had one strength that couldn’t be beaten – It was almost always empty. Come to think of it, that’s probably why it’s on the brink of closing permanently; but for this one weekend, we could enjoy the classics in the way they’re meant to be enjoyed – And best of all, with no-one else there.
What we didn’t count on at the time, as we were around six pints of beer deep by then, was that 1pm was an incredibly early start for someone who’s head felt like mine did.
Regardless, I was looking forward to it. So I quickly jumped in the shower, threw on my worn hoodie and jeans, and headed out of the door. Before the cinema though, there was just enough time for a good old fashioned English breakfast to try and clear the hangover – And there were some fried sausages with my name on them.
Paul met me in the local greasy spoon cafe, and we started eating our plates of grease and fat in a zombie-like fashion. However, with each mouthful, we became to feel more and more human. Eventually it was 12:45pm and we were both ready for some classic horror.
Leaving a handful of change on the table, we headed out the door and sauntered down the road towards the tattered yet recognisable cinema sign on the corner. We stepped foot inside the dimly-lit foyer and bought our tickets, which came with a free soft drink. Come to think of it, the reasons for the cinema going out of business were now stacking up by the minute.
With huge expectant smiles on our faces, we grabbed our full sugar soft drinks (No sugar-free for us!) and large popcorns, and strode excitedly into the screening room. Although it was difficult to see, as expected, there was not another soul in there.
Looking around as though we were kings surveying their kingdom, we plumped for the two seats in the perfect location – Six rows back, and dead centre. We had this down to a fine art by this point.
The first movie was a classic – Alien.
We both chomped eagerly through our stale (But satisfyingly salty at least) popcorn, which made us gulp down our free drinks. An hour through the movie, Paul made the universally-known hand motion for a drink. I nodded, and Paul shot up out of his seat and down the aisle. We had seen this movie so many times that he would probably be able to quote the next line as soon as he came back.
After only a minute or two, Paul came back with two more large drinks, and this time with some candy. After that point, we remained glued to our seats for the rest of the movie; and even stayed put throughout the start of the next movie. We were well set for the rest of the day, and I couldn’t wait for the final few movies – They were the absolute best.
After two large drinks, I was absolutely bursting at the seams and had to visit the bathroom. I glanced over to Paul and returned the universal drink gesture; which was met by a passionate thumbs up. I struggled up to my feet, and wandered down the aisle.
Looking over at the concessions counter, the attendant looked incredibly bored. He was scrolling through his phone, looking like he wished a hole could appear and swallow him whole. I couldn’t take it anymore, and swiftly headed into the bathroom. I’d grab the drinks afterwards.
After what seemed like an eternity, I relieved myself and walked up to the mirror, by the wash basin. The light above the mirror was incredibly dim, and it was difficult to see things very clearly. I used the soap, and turned the tap to wash my hands. I still didn’t feel 100% - So I leaned in close to the mirror, and pulled my eyes down – Blood shot. It was going to be a long night.
As I was thinking this, the light started to flicker intensely; and the worst pain imaginable shot through my entire body. It felt as though a huge needle was being threaded from the top of my head, through my body, and down through my toes. As this intense pain was registering, I remember thinking that this was it. I assumed I was having a massive stroke or something, and that I would soon perish.
The light seemed to flicker in unison with the pulses of pain convulsing through me, reaching a crescendo after what seemed like an eternity. I pushed my eyes closed, and suddenly, the pain stopped. I silently stood there for a moment, expecting the agony to take hold again. But it didn’t. Silently, I thanked God that it was over; and chalked it up to a cluster headache brought on by a mixture of the previous night’s alcohol, the greasy breakfast and the copious amounts of sugar I had just ingested.
I stumbled out of the bathroom holding my head, and thought that some water would see me right. Wandering over to the concession stand, I couldn’t see the attendant any more. I waited for a couple of minutes, but still no sign. I didn’t want to miss the end of the movie, even though I had seen it dozens of times. Assuming that the attendant must have gone around the back to have a smoke, I grabbed a couple of chilled bottles of water from the refrigerator and left a banknote on the counter. Anyway, it was his fault for leaving the place unattended.
Grasping one of the bottles in my left hand, and rubbing the other on my forehead to cool off, I pushed open the door to the screening room with my foot. Fantastic – I hadn’t missed much. The movie was just about to reach its crescendo with the big pay-off.
The images on the screen were very dark, which made it very difficult to find my way around. I felt my way down towards our seats – Six rows back, and in the middle. No-one was there.
I double-checked my thinking, and retraced my steps. No, this was definitely six rows back and in the middle. The movie was even the same one we were watching when I left – This must be the right room.
Putting the bottles down on our seats, I made my way back down the aisle towards the exit – Made a bit easier now that my eyes had adjusted to the light.
I hurriedly stepped into the bathroom that I had not long left – Maybe somehow Paul had needed the bathroom too, and missed me. I’m not sure how that would happen though, as it was right next door.
I glanced around the dim bathroom, and could not see any sign of Paul. I even called out to him, and knocked gently upon each of the stall doors. None of them were occupied, and swung open to reveal their emptiness with the smallest push.
Trying to make sense of this, I reasoned that he must have nipped out of the cinema for some reason, and would be back soon. I stepped out of the bathroom, and glanced at the concession stand. My banknote still sat unmoved upon the counter. Strange.
Not wanting to miss the end of the movie, I went back into the screening room and settled into my seat; next to the now vacated seat where a solitary bottle of water now stood. He’ll be back in no time, I thought.
The movie ended the way it always did. I scanned around the room – Still no sign of him. After waiting for a few minutes, the next movie was about to begin. Thinking that he would be back soon, I tried to get comfortable and take my mind off of things with the new movie in the marathon.
I felt as though I was in a trance – My mind was running at a million miles per hour. I didn’t even think to take a drink. My water was still untouched, although by now it was now almost room temperature. I take a quick glance at my phone (Who wears a watch these days?), and somehow, it was now about an hour later.
Starting to get worried, I thought I would try giving Paul a call to see where he was. Did I do anything wrong? Did I annoy him in any way?
I left the room again, to the sound of blood-curdling screams and shrill strings from the movie on-screen. I jogged towards the exit of the cinema – Past the deserted bathroom, and also what I didn’t register at the time, the empty concession stand with the untouched banknote.
Pushing open the cinema doors with gusto, I stepped out onto the pavement so that I could get signal. Staring down at my phone, I checked for any messages that he might have sent me. Nothing.
I wrote a very short message to Paul, and swiftly pressed send. It may have been something along the lines of ‘WTF?’.
After a short while, the message didn’t go through. Peculiar.
Starting to panic now, I found his contact in the phone and called. I held the phone up to my ear, and waited for it to ring. Straight to voicemail.
However, as I lifted my head to listen to the phone-call, I noticed something unbelievably strange. Looking down the straight main road leading down from the cinema, it looked as though time had stood still. On each side of the road, there were cars – Nothing out of the ordinary at first glance. But these cars were stationary.
In disbelief, with the phone still glued to my ear playing the voicemail automated message, I bent down to peer inside one of the cars that was nearby. It was completely empty. The engine was still on, but it was completely empty. The radio was even still playing, although it was one of those automated stations that just plays music.
I checked car after car, and they were all completely empty. It was as if they had vanished off the face of the earth.
I dashed back into the cinema, and feverishly ran to the screening room. Scrambling down to our seats, I frantically felt around Paul’s seat. Tucked into the seat at the back was Paul’s phone.
Grabbing the phone and placing it into my pocket, I sprinted back out of the cinema as fast as my legs could take me. As I ran past every shop, I looked in to look for someone, anyone who knew what was going on. Every single shop was empty, and there was no sign of anyone for miles. I ran the entire length of that road, and couldn’t see a single other person. I even screamed at the top of my lungs – Nothing, apart from the low murmur of the car engines.
After it began to get dark, I didn’t know what else to do. I mean, what did I have that was familiar? What did I know?
So, exhausted, I struggled back to the cinema from whence I came. Kicking down the projectionist’s booth door, I managed to figure out how to load the movies. It was quite simple when you think about it. So I loaded up my favourite movie – The Shining. And in disbelief, shuffled down to the room and the seat where things were so different this morning. And I watched. For those two hours, I could suppress the gnawing, horrifying thoughts piercing my brain.
These people were here. They might be on the screen, but if I took the part of one of the characters and spoke their lines, it would feel as though the other characters were talking to me. I knew the movie so well that this was second-nature. The first time, I would play the role of the lead actor. The second, the lead actress. But by the fifth, the tenth time, I’d try to mix it up with some of the minor characters; but it would get lonely only having people talk to you for a few lines.
Every time the movie finished, I would go back up to the projectionist booth, and re-load it. I actually became quite good at it.
I’ve moved on from that movie now, and with every new one, it feels as though new people are talking to me. I’ve even tried a few movies I’ve never seen before.
I’ve lost count of the days now. But the banknote is still on the concession counter.
It seems as though I have gotten my wish from all those years ago. Everyone has left me alone, and now I’m all by myself. I am special now, for I may well be the last human on the Earth. If anyone ever finds this note, you can find me at the old cinema on Kings Road.
I’d love to be able to talk to another person again, just once. Just once.