You would never know it to look at us. We eat, sleep, joke, argue, just like everyone else. People are adaptable, if anything.
Behind it all my family has kept a secret, one that has been gnawing away at us for generations. Every single one of us is cursed. Some more than others.
Abbie, my niece, is the least cursed of us all. She’s only twelve. Her time will come soon enough.
Howard, my oldest brother, is the most cursed. He has always been a selfless man.
And me, I fall somewhere in the middle.
Our curses come yearly on the 10th of December, and we get to decide who among us will take them on. That’s the extent of our control. My husband begged to take my place last year, but I declined. I could never let him do that.
When we met and fell in love, he had no idea what he was getting into. I told him when he proposed.
It just came flooding out of me that night by the lake while he knelt on one knee, ring in hand, staring at me in shock. I told him about the curses and their rules, and how they were the reason for all of my ‘eccentricities’ - if you break them you have to be prepared to pay, and pay dearly. I told him I had considered breaking it off more than once… He wanted me anyway. I couldn’t say no.
Last year, as usual, the entire Adler family trickled to my parent’s house on the 9th of December. Since inheriting it from my grandparents, Pie lived in their attic, only brought out to the living room when it was time. That’s the name of the thing that gives us our curses… “Pie.” My great, great grandpa called it that as a nickname when he was little, and it stuck. Its original name has been lost somewhere along the way.
How my parents carry on day to day with it in the house, I don’t know.
Olly and I made our way inside with our luggage, having arrived late due to a delayed flight. Everyone else sat quietly waiting. There were a few nods of greeting, a couple of hugs, but the vibe as a whole was tense.
In bed, Olly leaned on his elbow and stared at me. “I saw you talking to your sister and mom… they know who’s going this time?”
I shook my head. “No one does. We’ll just play by ear tomorrow.”
He lay back down. It was only his second time, and being a very organized person, he hated how we didn’t talk about what was going to happen or agree ahead of time which of us would take the curse. He never understood that we chose to put our heads in the sand 363 days a year. That it’s the only way we could cope. Some of us had curses we had to constantly be on the lookout for; things we had to avoid. He just didn’t understand the stress of it all… yet.
“Howard can’t take on another one.” He mused.
“Mhm.”
“Neither can your folks.”
I rolled my back to him, not wanting to get into it right now. I already knew I was doomed to a night without sleep; I at least wanted it to be quiet.
He continued, hushed. “Liz is pregnant, so she’s out. And… Richie, is it? He got a real bad one, so it’s not fair he takes another. John can’t cause… well, he has issues. So who does that leave?”
“Babe, please… just leave it, ok? We can do this tomorrow.”
The bed moved as he slid over and snaked his arms around my waist. “Abbie. Nate. Helen. You…”
“Please, just. No more.”
He kissed the back of my head. “…and me.”
We ate breakfast around the big table. Bacon, eggs, juice, pancakes. Howard had rolled oats and coffee - not much in his life wasn’t impacted or restricted by his curses. Watching him broke my heart all over again.
At noon we drifted into the living room. Mom had placed Pie on the mantelpiece. Looking at it, you’d never know the misery it caused. Carved from wood, it was a blocky, clumsy thing that somewhat resembled a bull head, except with a shortened snout and circular eyes. The mouth was ajar and carved out – just big enough for a hand to fit inside.
Mom brought in the yellow book; our tattered guide to some of the curses compiled by… someone or something, probably when all of this began. It had been added to by a very long line of descendants over the years, as well. She placed it on the coffee table and took a seat, hissing as she did so. Her very last curse had not been written in the book - which left us in a scary limbo for fear of accidentally breaking a rule. In time we realized it was a physical curse that had manifested as rheumatoid arthritis. We added it to the passages.
Abbie scooted onto the floor, staring up at Pie eagerly. “I can do this one, if you guys want me to.”
She was so brave, so much like her uncle and her father.
Richie immediately began to sign in her general direction. Helen, my big sister, dressed in all black since her last curse vetoed colored clothing, put a soothing arm on him.
“It’s alright, it’s alright. She won’t be taking one,” she shot a stern look at Abbie, who stared at the floor, frowning.
Richie went on: You won’t be either, Helen. We’ve given enough!
“Yeah well, that’s how it works. Suck it up, the kids wants to do it.” John, my other brother, sniffed. He was shaking and kept licking his lips – probably withdrawing already, I realized. He wouldn’t dare bring his smack into mom and dad’s house… Hell, give it a few hours, and he’d probably volunteer just so he could get it over and done with and go get his fix.
Richie began signing some insulting things about John’s life choices, and John sneered back.
“Hey now,” dad began but interrupted himself with a coughing fit. This silenced everyone. He continued after getting a hold of himself. “We don’t fight. We make a decision. No more, no less. Got it?”
A mumble carried around the room.
“Alright then. So, we know who can’t take one on,” Olly glanced at me as dad spoke, his expression grave. “That means it’s only between a few of ya. You know who you are, so… any hands?”
Dad stared at each of us pointedly. He was the no nonsense, rip the bandaid off type all my life. I knew, though, that it was a front. Last night I heard him pacing right up until sunrise, and there was no doubt in mind he had been doing it long before we arrived. The dark crevices under his eyes betrayed him.
Howard held up a hand. Everyone stared at him surprised, yet not. “I can take another.”
“No you cannot, Mr.” said mom, her eyes immediately tearing up.
“I can. I can take one more, at minimum. You know it.”
“Howard,” I said. He looked at me and smiled lopsidedly. Half of his face was heavily scarred, ever since he got the curse to burn some years ago. “You trying to steal the spotlight again? Well I won’t let you, you greedy bastard.”
He laughed, and then everyone was laughing. Then the laughter died down and it was silent and heavy again.
My baby sister, Liz, made circles on her growing belly with a fingertip. Nate seemed hypnotized by it, his eyes full of love.
He was the most eligible of us all, aside from Olly. He’d only taken one and it was an easy one. He was lucky. Maybe we should use that luck…
I shot the thought down. Liz was expecting. What if Nate got a bad one? A really bad one? Liz could quite possibly become a single mother.
“I meant what I said before.” I spoke up.
“Sam…” Olly warned.
I couldn’t look at him. “It’s my turn. I want to take this one.”
Mom and dad looked deeply saddened, but they did not argue. No one did. It had to be done.
I stood, but Olly stood quicker. “I’ll do it.” He stated. “Here, right? I just put my hand in here-“
He went for the gaping maw of Pie. I ran ahead of him, physically blocking him. “Don’t be stupid.”
“I’m not. I know exactly what I’m doing. I’m taking it, alright?”
He tried to pass again and I shoved him back. “Sit. Down.”
He stared hard at me. He could overpower me, and I could tell he was considering it. “You made me a promise, Oliver. I take promises very seriously. I get to choose when you take one. Don’t break this promise. Don’t do that to me.”
His eyes faltered, and then all of a sudden he sat down and wilted into the sofa, eyes closed.
John scoffed and wiped his nose, about to launch into some kind of rant. Dad shot him a look and he immediately shut up.
I turned and faced Pie. Circular eyes seemed to bore into me.
I looked over my shoulder at Howard, his expression even and stoic and what I needed to continue.
I stepped forward, hand out and flat, and slid it into the void.
Instantly a minor pain bloomed on the back of my hand, much like a pinch, and I snatched it back and immediately covered it with my other palm.
My heart thumped like race horse. All eyes were on me and I could barely stand it.
Suddenly the memory of Richie receiving his last curse invaded my mind.
The panic. Helen’s screaming. The way he scratched at his eyes and mouth and tried to speak but couldn’t and tried to see but couldn’t-
Olly scooted to the edge of the sofa. “What is it?”
I took a deep breath and peered at my mark.
Small and black, like an ink stain – it was the rough shape of a diamond. In a few months it would be gone, soaked up, unlike the curse it represented. That was forever.
“I don’t recognize it.” I said, though that didn’t mean much. I poured over the book a lot as a kid, but there were simply too many curses to memorize.
I showed the mark to mom. She moved the book to her lap and carefully began leafing through pages, Abbie hovering over her shoulder as she liked to do.
A minute later she froze, eyes wide, finger pointed at a line on a page.
“What!” I asked, voice pitching. “Just tell me.”
Olly squeezed my hand. His was sweating.
“Thirty million heart beats…” Mom uttered.
Oh boy, that doesn’t sound good.
I almost fell down but Olly kept me standing.
“What does that mean?!” He practically shouted.
“It means…” I stammered. “It means… that’s what I have left-“
“Wait!” Abbie cried. She rested the book from mom and stared into it. Richie frantically began signing again, but Helen stopped him gently. “The shape’s not right! The top’s wrong… let me see.”
I walked to her on wobbly legs and offered her my hand. She studied it and then returned to the book. Mom looked awfully pale. I sat down beside her chair.
“I’m right! See?” Abbie smiled widely. “It‘s not a million heartbeats… It’s this one, “Sleep foot East.””
“Foot East?” I repeated, double checking my marking against the curses. I closed the book with a soft thud and stared at Abbie and then Olly. “It matches.”
“Oh my God,” mom breathed shakily. “I’m so sorry… I thought… These old eyes of mine…”
I leaned over and hugged her. “It’s alright… I’m very thankful for your old eyes, right now.”
Howard erupted into laughter.
Outside, we each bid each other farewell and exchanged the usual: stay safe, look out for your curses. John was the first to leave, even though mom and dad asked him to stay the night.
Then Richie, Helen, and Abbie. I hugged Abbie extra tight. Nate and Liz left next.
As usual Howard brushed them all off. He thought it was wrong to have children because the curse could end with us if we didn’t. But mom and dad insisted it wasn’t that easy. That to end the curse’s lineage one way or another would have terrible consequences that reached far outside of our family. They could never go into specifics; those too seemed to have been lost to time.
Howard waved out the window as the taxi cab took him away. He didn’t leave his home much – too risky - and had no electricity. If I was lucky he’d reply to my letters.
I said the final goodbyes to my parents. Dad had another coughing fit, and I waited with him until it was under control.
“Go on, enjoy the year as best you can.” He ordered me.
Olly and I got in the car. He took my hand and ran his thumb over my mark. “I still can’t believe all of this is real, sometimes…”
“Me either.”
He kissed the mark. “Guess we have a bedroom to reorientate.”
We exchanged warm smiles. He was just trying to cheer me up and I appreciated it, but inside I couldn’t stop thinking about my curse…
I always promised to be honest with Olly, but there are some things I can’t bring myself to share even now. Things like the fact that mom wasn’t wrong. Abbie was.