I live in a small village in Ireland which can be best described as being in the arsehole of nowhere. You could drive through it in less than 30 seconds and some people have probably blinked and missed it.
There is nothing of interest locally and I have been saving up for the last few months in the hopes of moving out. I don’t care where I move to as long as it is anywhere but here. I don’t have a car so I am forced to rely on public transport if I want to go anywhere of interest.
Everyone around here knows everyone else and I don’t think there is a single secret. We all know that the Smith girl is pregnant by the Anderson boy, even though the ungrateful little shit refuses to acknowledge that he is the father.
Things around here are so boring that the weeks are impossible to tell apart. This slowly began to change about a month ago.
I was out doing my weekly grocery shopping in the local supermarket and was in the dairy aisle trying to find the freshest milk.
I heard the unmistakable sounds of somebody impatiently tapping their feet followed by a number of exasperated sighs. I took a quick sniff and almost choked due to the overwhelming stench of cigarettes.
I didn’t have to look around to know that Mrs O’Reilly was behind me. She was the village busybody who loved to shove her nose into everyone else’s business. She was always outside walking with this ugly hairless dog.
I took my time picking out the milk as I hated her for telling my parents after she caught me drinking with my friends.
She began to get more and more annoyed and her sighs were quickly being followed by throaty coughs which made me flinch each time.
I eventually decided that I had messed with her enough and grabbed the milk with the longest expiration date. I took a couple of deep breaths and turned to face the old biddy.
I was instantly confused as there was noone behind me but I could still hear the tapping of feet. My eyes lowered to the ground and I jumped back as I saw what stood there.
It looked like a deformed version of Miss Piggy from the Muppets, with blood red eyes and tusks protruding from the side of the mouth. Foam sprayed out as it took into a fit of coughing. Her dog stood beside her and was trying to cower away from whatever she had turned into.
My mouth hung open when Mrs O’Reilly’s voice emanated from this creature. It asked me to move so it could get to the milk. I stepped aside and watched in amazement as it picked up the milk and walked away dragging the helpless dog in her wake.
I stood there frozen in wonder for a few moments but then shook myself out of my stupor. I inched forward and watched as they approached the till and paid for their groceries. I watched in horror as she picked up her dog and impaled it on her tusks. Blood sprayed down her face and she seemed to be basking in its taste. Within seconds the counter was covered in blood and guts.
My eyes darted around to the other customers but none of them were paying her any attention.
I was about to follow her out the door when the cashier called me back as I hadn’t paid for my stuff. I tried not to vomit as the cashier rolled my groceries through the blood which soon saturated every item. I worked on autopilot and paid for the items.
I walked out the door with them before realising what I was holding and throwing it to the street in disgust. I spotted a blood trail and slowly followed it to Mrs O’Reilly’s house. I considered knocking on the door but managed to talk myself out of it.
I went home and my entire body was shaking so I went to lay down. I awoke early the next morning and had managed to convince myself that it was a psychotic episode.
I went for a walk to clear my mind and noticed a crowd was gathered in the square. I made my way over and found out that the Smith girl had a healthy baby boy last night.
She stood in the middle of a group of women who were fawning over her and the baby. I moved forward to get a closer look but it was difficult as the women were so tightly packed around her.
A small gap appeared and I managed to shove my way forward. The baby was covered in a shawl and I couldn’t get a good view.
The baby let out an ear splitting screech and the Smith girl smiled and claimed it must be hungry. She adjusted her top slightly and her breast came into view.
She removed the shawl and I almost screamed at what let beneath. The creature looked like a frog that had been run through a blender. Pieces of its flesh were jutting out in every direction and it’s only distinguishing feature were rows of razor sharp teeth.
I watched in horrified silence as the Smith girl raised this monstrosity to her breast. The creature latched onto her nipple and began biting into her flesh. Within a minute it had devoured over a third of her breast and blood was pouring down her body.
All of the other women were commenting on how precious he was, and how he has his father’s eyes. I began to back away in terror as I watched the creature began burrowing into the Smith girl’s flesh. She crumpled to the ground and a minute later the creature crawled out of her mouth.
I turned and fled back home and locked the door as I feared that it might follow me home. I put in my earphones and listened to System Of A Down to clear my head.
I didn’t leave my house for the next few days as I kept imagining the creature crawling into my throat and eating my tongue. I was eventually forced to leave as my food supplies were running low and I knew that I would starve if I didn’t go.
The village was beyond silent as I made my way along. The only sounds were the leaves rustling in the wind. My eyes were darting in all directions as I feared that someone would sneak up behind me.
I reached the supermarket and ran around grabbing food which would last me as long as possible. I walked up to the till and shrank back as I met the cashier’s gaze.
Her expression was of someone who was shell shocked, and there were tears streaming down her cheeks. She began checking out my items and I rushed back into the aisles as I remembered that I needed milk.
I started returning to the till and slowed my pace as I couldn’t see the cashier. I inched forward carefully as someone was still scanning my items. My heart was pounding in my chest as I spotted the creature that was now working the till.
It looked like a demonic Teddy bear with a long tongue that trailed out of it’s mouth. Some kind of acid was being excreted by the tongue as the conveyor belt was sizzling. Every few seconds the bear would mutter “waka waka” before scanning another item.
It turned it’s gaze on me when it had finally finished scanning my items. I reached into my pocket and pulled out my debit card. I prayed that I had enough in my bank as I tapped the card. I let out a sigh of relief as my card was accepted.
I quickly began packing up my stuff and could feel the bears eyes on me the whole time. I obviously wasn’t paying attention as it’s tongue caressed my skin. I began screaming in agony as the flesh began to sizzle and turn crimson red. The bear let out a triumphant “Waka waka” as I grabbed my bags and fled out the door.
I slid to a halt as I gazed up the street towards my home. Each side of the street was lined with creatures that could only stem from a child’s worst nightmares.
Every single one of them was staring towards me as I gazed back at them. I forced my legs to start moving and I walked down the middle of the road as far from them as possible.
I could hear the unmistakable sounds of footfalls behind me and knew that they were following me. Every step took me closer to home but I feared that I might not reach it.
My eyes darted to what looked like two men, who were laughing manically at some internal joke. Everytime they laughed their eyeballs would pop out and then they would be forced to push them back in.
I spotted my front door in the distance and quickened my pace, but the footfalls behind me sped up as well. I was practically sprinting as I reached the door, and almost screamed in resignation as the keys fell from my hands.
I yanked them from the ground and unlocked the door and rushed inside. I took a minute to compose myself before peering back out the window.
There was now a mass of creatures standing in my garden staring at my front door. I quickly put away my groceries and lay on the couch to calm myself down.
Someone has been knocking on my door for the last hour and I can hear “Waka waka” after every knock.
Tears are streaming down my cheeks at the moment and I have an overwhelming urge to play the drums. Please god someone help me.