The realization hit me like a bullet to the brain.
I was probably going to die, and not in a pleasant way either. The blistering cold rain crashed against my naked body. My teeth had been chattering for hours, my jaw exploding in pain with every motion.
It was then I collapsed, face colliding with the mud below me. My feet had been wearing away, like the shoes I used to have. The skin was peeling, and the many small cuts where beginning to take its toll.
How many thousands of miles had I wondered? And for what purpose? What reason could have convinced me of such a fate? Did I even know where I was?
No, unfortunately I did not. However, I did know one thing. One thing that was indisputable. I was here. In the current moment, I was real. This moment was mine, and mine alone. All of this, was mine.
It was my ragged breaths that fought against the wind to leave my throat, it was my feet that ached from nonstop travel, it was my skin that was battered and bruised from the elements.
And it was my stomach that was rumbling.
It was hard to recall the last time I had actually eaten food. Something other than the bark from a tree, or leftover garbage on the side of the road.
But even that seemed appealing compared to the weakness in my limbs, the drowsy mindset that had taken over, the constant illness.
It was then my desperation had reached its peak. I forced myself to sit up, placing one hand on the ground to keep me from collapsing once more. With my free hand, I gathered a clump of ice cold mud, and stuffed it into my mouth.
The wet dirt entered my mouth, and the taste alone nearly made me gag. I began slowly chewing, gnashing the more stubborn clumps between my molars. With every bite, it worked its way between every gap in my rotting teeth, every cavity filled with sodden earth.
Finally, after chewing, I finally garnered the confidence to swallow. Unfortunately, the bile rising from my stomach had refused the sustenance, and forced me to vomit.
There was nothing left in my stomach to get rid of, so all that came out was acid, which left a horrible burning sensation in my esophagus.
I collapsed once more, before forcing another scoop into my mouth.
It was then I decided to tune out what I was forced to consume. The frosty chill of the wind, the stabbing pains throughout my legs, and the hunger where enough to make my mind wander.
Wander, and wander.
I must have fallen asleep, as the scene before me was somewhere else entirely.
Before me stood a large table, millions of miles long, with every food and confectionery you could imagine. A fireplace next to it, equally as long, flames roaring out in contempt of cold.
Giddy, I began reaching out, and stuffing my face with every food I saw.
First I reached for Apples, rich, and full-bodied. The pulp oozing with each bite.
Then, the beef, so exquisitely prepared with what had to be the finest seasonings in the world, and cooked to the perfect temperature, hot enough to make the fat melt in your mouth.
Then, my hands shot for the Biscuits so buttery and smooth you could-
A hand grasped my wrist, and yanked me onto the table.
Suddenly, I found my back on the table, facing the the splendourous tapestry on the ceiling, when a thing entrenched in darkness emerged from outside of my vision.
“Onm¯ælan ðanon ðone as sinoðbefrêogan sê hafenlêas wealdgenga.M¯æst onhinderling un−l¯æd [it’s] blâwung [was] [merely] [survival]”
Suddenly, I was brought back to reality by a lightning strike less than an inch from my head. I immediately jolted up, when i noticed a few things.
The rain had, gotten warm. And a certain energy had been returned to me. But most importantly, my stomach, felt satisfied.
I was still hungry, but I felt as though I could walk again.
I carefully stood up, burping up a bit of mud as I did. It carried with it worms. A few had been caught in my cavities, but most where stuck in between them.
After gagging and pulling them out as quick as I could, I continued pushing on through the rain, before, spotting in the distance.
Lights.
The familiar lights, of a gas station.
Immediately filled with elation, I began staggering my way toward the first shelter I had seen for miles.