This happened back in 2021, on the Valentine’s Day, just before the second wave of Covid 19. Most adults were vaccinated and slowly starting to venture out with their masks on, sanitising constantly. There was the fear of another outbreak, another lockdown and co-morbidities. It had been a year since I had any sort of human contact. I was not in the best place in my life.
My boyfriend of six years had cheated on me in 2019 with one of my best friends. When I confronted him, he told me that he had already proposed to her, she had said yes and that he was moving out. I was completely broken for two reasons. I had found the ring a few days ago and assumed it was for me. Secondly, because he had pursued me so vehemently during college that I was convinced that he wouldn’t leave me, ever. Even after we got together, he kept telling me that “You are the one for me”. I had never been with anyone else my entire life of 24 years and trusted him deeply.
I was devastated and alone. The pandemic added to my misery. During the lockdown, in mid 2020, I saw the pictures of their intimate wedding, held at their apartment, with all my close friends in attendance. It broke me and I distanced myself from the handful of friends that I had.
The only solace of my life was my art, my job and the stray cat that followed me home while coming back from a grocery shop. I named him Jazz due to his erratic rhythm while purring.
I had decided to pull myself together for the new year of 2021 and that this was going to be my year. I decided that I needed new people in my life. I could only find dating applications online. But when I searched further, I found an app called ‘Humcon’ as in human-connection. It was in beta phase, so free and based on compatibility of your biology, especially blood type. I was intrigued. After reading some articles posted by the app on this topic, I was convinced that people of similar biology stick together.
The application had a welcome page with some harmless personality and health based questions. The reports it generated based on these, was astonishingly accurate. It categorised me as introverted, predicted my food preferences and even suggested restaurants and bars which would suit me from my city.
I was gasping at the accuracy of the predictions and feeling a little queasy when my phone dinged with a notification from the app, a “handshake” from a person named Robbie. I read the report on this person. They seemed to have the same blood group and matched my health profile. The app didn’t support photos of more than 100 kb and the person had not specified their gender. It was, apparently a policy of the developers to not base your choice of friendships/partners on superficial details.
I dared myself to accept the ‘handshake’. They were charming and extremely polite while texting on the app. I shared my art with them. They appreciated my work and said that they could feel the deep pain hidden in my work. I hadn’t felt so respected and seen in a very long time. They asked if I was comfortable to meet with them on the coming Sunday. I checked my calendar and realised, that Sunday was the Valentine’s Day. I hesitated for a moment but I had promised myself to have new experiences this year and I was partially happy thinking that I won’t be alone on valentine’s.
I said yes after taking my time and they were extremely chill about it. They suggested that we should try out one of the cafes that the app had suggested. I agreed. I was smiling to myself after a long time. I imagined them to be an older female who was very caring, whom I would become bff with, on our first meeting.
We met at the cafe on Valentine’s Day evening. It was sort of empty, I assumed due to Covid and how far it was from the city. My next surprise was when they removed their hoodie, it was a pale, tall guy with a very charming smile. I was a little disappointed but also sort of happy. He was a perfect gentleman, he held the door, pulled my chair and was considerate while ordering. I felt so relaxed around him. I was happy that I made this decision.
The application was not meant for dating but this casual meeting felt like a date. As the night progressed I found myself falling for him. As it got darker we decided to a walk to a pub, listed on the app, on the seaside. We walked the streets holding hands like an old married couple. He listened intently to all my stories. It was so easy to talk to him that I spoke about my previous relationship and break-up for the very first time to someone. I decided to have a light dinner at the pub while he drank some red wine and sat looking at me lovingly while I continued to talk.
He offered to walk me back home. I felt that both of us were walking slower like we didn’t want this meeting to end. When I was about to say goodbye, he looked deeply into my eyes and said something. All I heard was a sound like the ringing of glass and that he liked me very much. I thought it was something from the near by diner which was buzzing with lovey-dovey couples. I had this strong urge to invite him in.
We went upstairs and started kissing. It felt like I was getting intoxicated by the wine he drank. I heard that glassy voice again, he whispered into my ear, “You are the one for me.” The hurtful memories of my past relationship came back flooding into my mind and it felt like I snapped out of a daze.
I looked into the mirror and I couldn’t see his reflection but when I looked back he was too close to my neck. I noticed with shock that how his mouth had sharp fangs and too many teeth. I could barely make eye contact, it burnt. His bright red gaze was melting my insides into mush but not due to love, this time. I shut my eyes tightly and screamed while trying to free myself. His grip was too strong.
I saw Jazz in my peripheral vision. He was standing by the door in attack mode, hissing this whole time. I screamed at him to leave and save himself. But my guardian angel jumped on the monster. I freed myself, picked up Jazz and ran straight out. I sat down under the street light near the crowded diner opposite my apartment, with Jazz on my lap. Jazz was shaking but in his protective hyper alert mode, he intently stared at my bedroom window above. A pair of eyes, like spots from a laser pointer, were looking back at us. I had made the mistake of inviting something not so human into my house.
I looked down and covered Jazz with my jacket. The exertion of the night had tired me, I dozed off. When I woke up, Jazz seemed relaxed, which gave me some courage to look up. I went back to my apartment.
I felt that he was waiting for the sunset to come back. I packed my bags and drove to my parents’ house. I hadn’t told them about my breakup yet. I decided to make that my reason to come home. My mother hugged me tight and consoled me. She made my favourite soup. Me and Jazz were relaxed by now, we had left the monster behind.
I slept soundly. In the middle of the night, I woke up sweating. I had had a nightmare. I got out of my bed and found the window open.
And there it was, sitting on the tree, right outside my window, staring at me with its fiery eyes. It started speaking in its glassy voice, commanding me to invite it in.
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It has been two years since. It still stares at me from the tree every night. I try to shield myself by not opening the window, blackout curtains, headphones, loud music and what not. I work from home now and never get out of my house. My parents ask me to go for therapy. They think that I am depressed due to the break up. The ‘Humcon’ app seems to have disappeared into thin air. I can’t even locate the restaurants it had suggested. Jazz is always on high alert after sunset and some nights, when the voices are loud, he cries with a fervour, like he is in pain. I cannot take this anymore.
And now, I am getting rash like burn marks on the side of my body facing the window, doctors think it’s long-Covid. But I know it is not.
I don’t know what to do, should I tell my parents and get help? But will they believe me?