I honestly didn’t realize there was a subreddit for those of us that get no sleep! Well my name is Megan and I’m 33 and currently residing in southern California (do we do late night meet ups? If we aren’t sleeping anyways maybe we could do something fun instead!).
Anyway, (sorry I tend to ramble a lot when I’m tired) my no sleeping problem (I honestly love that term for insomniacs) started I would say about five years ago. I had just bought my first house (well it was a condo but semantics). There was an odd list of rules sitting on the counter. Something about not using the oven after a certain time, ignoring the dog barking at the door and something about never turning the guest bathroom light off. There were a few more but I honestly didn’t even finish reading it before I threw it away. I mean this is my house (condo) and how dare my snotty nose neighbors tell me what I can and can’t do with it none of these rules were in the HOA agreement. What do they care if I use my oven to make a snack late at night? And if some poor neighbor dog got out and needed help or food I’m not going to ignore it I’m going to help the poor thing! Am I right?
Well I guess I broke to many rules for these stupid neighbors (the dog was actually pretty nice GIANT shaggy thing with orange eyes) because not even three days after I moved in I made myself a late night snack (vegan chicken nuggets for the win!) in the oven. After I went to bed some asshole broke in and burned my whole house down with me in it! Oh Zeus it was awful. The fire alarms didn’t go off and when I did wake up from hearing the dog barking at my door I felt like I was trapped on my mattress with some crazy evil force holding me down (my therapist says this is most likely caused by sleep paralysis and the hallucinations I’m having now are caused by awake dreaming)! The barking kept getting louder and louder and I think he (or I guess could of been a she I honestly never checked) broke the front door down because the next thing I know they were standing on my chest and barking then I could feel them (the dog I’m trying to stay gender neutral) pulling me off the bed. The flames were everywhere (I know this sounds crazy but I swear it’s what happened) but every time the dog would drop me and bark at the flames the flames would move out of the way. It was honestly very traumatic. I survived though I had a few burns and I now have a scar on the top of my foot that looks like an ancient rune (like a circle with a circle in it and several wavy and straight lines coming out of it).
The police said the fire came from the oven and I must have left it on. I know for a fact that I turned the damn thing off. Also none of the neighbors claimed to own the dog that I had been hanging out with. In fact, apparently, it would have been against the HOA rules to even have a dog that big there. I tried telling the police about the list of rules the neighbors left for me and that this must have been retaliation for not following them, but they didn’t believe me. They even accused me of trying to scam the system of insurance fraud or something. Can you believe that?
That’s kind of when this sleepless mess started. I kept having nightmares about it for weeks except in my dreams and in my sleep paralysis the dog never came to save me and I could/can feel the pain of burning to death while not being able to move.
Though I would not consider myself a no sleeper after just that incident. It was honestly a series of things that got me here. Like the time after I moved into a new house with my husband but it turned out that I didn’t have a husband and the constant danger he was warning me of wasn’t there and that he was actually the dangerous thing but he didn’t actually exist (this was a lot to unwrap with my therapist). Or the time I went on the deep-web and discovered this crazy site that allowed you to watch what other people were doing in their homes and you could vote on what happened to them (this was actually pretty cool until I saw myself on the site). Or the time that I took a job as a security guard for 160k a year but what I was guarding turned out to be some ancient alien technology hell bent on taking over the minds of all living things. The real icing on the cake though was when a very well dressed gentleman showed up at my door and offered me unlimited cash if he could control my body for one day a month.
I guess it’s a lot of stuff that got me to the no sleep lifestyle! Insomnia is not fun though. I did get a new doctor recently (his office is really creepy and old and he has a STRONG German accent but the Germans are efficient at this kind of stuff right?) and he is putting me on a clinical trial for a medication he invented to help with this kind of stuff! So I’m excited to try it out.
Well I look forward to meeting and getting to know all of you! If you have any tips or ticks that might help me get some sleep please let me know I’ll honestly try anything at this point.