Here are some more pages I found, translated to the best of my abilities. It’s hard to focus on all of this as I have a lot of work to do, and I’m starting to sleep worse and worse, always dreaming about the forest and the fog. Last night, I think I saw scrawny shapes and felt them watching me. Nevertheless, I have to tell you about all of this, about what I found. So, here is the next part of Ilya’s notes.
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The following days passed slowly. I had not slept well, and no one else had either. My dreams had been troubled, filled with demons and mist, and Sasha and his misery. He had survived, but a part of him had probably died too.
We took turns taking care of him. He was completely emaciated and stayed in bed for many days. The people who had lost friends and family members held no grudges against Sasha, but every now and then, I saw a dark shadow on their faces when they spoke bitterly and remorsefully about what had happened. They all knew that charity had to come first, but still… Sasha had not stopped the others.
I also felt dark thoughts arising in me, albeit of a different nature. It was true that my friend had fled, leaving the others behind, but… I probably would have done the same. I wanted to tell myself that I was like my grandfather, that I would have stood my ground, faced the demons with only my faith, but the voice in my head sprinkled doubt into my thoughts. I wanted to spend more time than usual praying and reflecting on myself, so I distanced myself a bit from village life. I continued to work in the fields when I could be spared from the carpentry shop. The hated fields that I had thought I had escaped from when I started my apprenticeship six years ago.
Why did they have to venture into the darkness selfishly? Now I had to help in the fields because they were gone. Now I had to toil so that enough harvest could be gathered in the fall, and we would not starve. They had just left, embarked on their path with false piety, and ultimately betrayed the Lord to the demons. It wouldn’t have happened to me, but I had been forced to stay here with all the others who…
There it was again, the voice I hated so much.
Why, why couldn’t I be without sin, without dark thoughts? Had the demons already exerted their influence on me? Had they poisoned me and now forced me to think such thoughts? Or worse, was it I, the real me, who was driving these words into my mind? The others, they had been pious, I had never doubted that. Something else must have happened; it didn’t make sense! I often visited Sasha after work and kept running into Mary, who had made it her mission to bring Sasha a hot meal every night, to take special care of him.
Mary.
Yes.
Mary should have gone along; she would certainly have been seduced and driven into the darkness. Then I would have been rid of her smug ways.
Was I jealous of Sasha and her? Did I think that way about Mary because I was alone and the two of them had apparently found each other?
When I lay in bed at night, darkness fell over my soul, and I had to pull myself out of the black with prayers. The Lord would guide me. I was sure of it. I would pass His tests.
One day, when I returned from field work and strolled home through the village square, I noticed Sasha standing next to the fountain. He seemed confused and beside himself. As I approached him, I noticed his sunken cheeks and pale face. From the looks of it, the time in bed, left only with his own thoughts, had affected his soul as much as the escape through the woods.
“Ilya… Ilya, I need to talk to you…” he murmured.
His gaze avoided mine, and he swallowed.
“Yes, what’s wrong?” I asked him.
“It’s Mary…” he said softly, almost tearfully.
“What’s wrong with her?”
“She is different. Today, when she came to me. You may know that we… I didn’t want to tell you, I know you don’t like her, but…”
Mary. Just a hypocrite, a hypocrite who was not faithful to the word of the Lord and only pretended to honor and love Him… And pretended to have changed…
The voice whispered softly, but I ignored it. I had to; Sasha was my friend. I prayed for him and his love.
Didn’t I?
Yes, I did. No more ungodly thoughts.
“What about her? Is she alright?” I forced myself to ask with feigned concern.
“Yeah, no, I don’t know. She was different today. Scared. Seemed kind of… scared of me. I have no idea why, but I could see it in her eyes.”
“Afraid of you? Why?”
“I don’t know. I have no idea. But somehow… Maybe she’s right. I haven’t felt good since I saw the demons. Ever since I shot at them.”
“No, she’s not right! There’s nothing wrong with you! You’ve been through a lot; how else would you feel after such experiences? Your faith makes you strong; you just need to rest!”
“Ilya, I think they got me… They are beginning to cast their spell on me too. I think back to the darkness, praying to the Lord… and I think I can hear Him. When I think back on what happened and that darkness, seeing that blackness in my mind… I believe I hear the voice of God there. A whisper, a sensation of… love…”
“You think the demons are trying to turn your faith against you?”
“Yes.”
“You must stay strong, no matter what you have been through. You must stay strong and read the scriptures! I know you’re in a bad place, but you can do it!”
Sasha frowned, seeming to digress and think.
“Yes, I think you’re right,” he said.
“Thank you, Ilya!”
With those words, he stomped off. I watched him go, slowly losing myself in thought. I remembered the demons, their looks, their blasphemous looks from the mist, their inhuman outlines. Would they leave Sasha in peace? Or would they always haunt him?
That evening, as I sat at the dinner table with my grandfather, my parents, and Zarina, I could sense that something was not quite right. It was colder than usual, and Zarina avoided our glances. I didn’t notice it at first because the previous evenings had also been bad, triggered by the terrible story Sasha had told about the trip. Suddenly, however, Zarina looked up and glanced at me.
“What did they look like, the demons?” she wanted to know.
Her fork was trembling.
“Why? I don’t know,” I said.
We hadn’t told her about the demons, and we hadn’t told her about Sasha’s experiences. She was still too young.
“You’ve seen them. Everybody knows. We all do. You talked about them, the others…”
“Keep eating,” my mother murmured.
“You’re too young for that. Ilya didn’t see anything. Those are just stupid rumors,” my father said, chewing.
He and my mother exchanged quick glances. My grandfather was silently absorbed.
“That’s right. I didn’t see anything. Only Sasha, who wasn’t feeling well. He…”
I started, but Zarina cut me off.
“Tonight, they were with me.”
My spoon fell to the floor with a clatter. My parents tensely sucked in their breath. My grandfather remained silent and closed his eyes.
“In your room? That can’t be. Ilya didn’t say anything about something like that. You just imagined it!” my mother said quickly, looking over at me.
But I didn’t know. I had been fast asleep, dreaming of shapes and mists.
“No, not like that. Not in the room. I just… It was deep in the night, and I couldn’t sleep. Just like every night since I saw the angel in my dream. I lay there and couldn’t sleep. I went to the window and looked out at the street.”
“What did you see there, Zarina?” my father asked.
I felt sick in my stomach. Were they here? Had the demons come to the village after chasing Sasha for so long? It had to be so. After all, why wouldn’t they come here? Because our faith was so strong? Never. Demons are not easily kept away by people, no matter how strong their devotion to the Lord was.
“It was at the end of the side alley next to our garden, next to the barrels and the mud hole in the street. You know I can’t see very far from my room, but there… There was something there. Like a glimmer that didn’t shine. In the darkness, I could hardly see it, but it was there. And in the shimmer… A shape. A large distorted shadow, not visible for long. Scrawny, emaciated, inhuman, tall. What was it doing there? It wasn’t looking in my direction. It didn’t notice me, looked elsewhere, further down the street, I think. It wasn’t there long either, soon disappearing into the shimmer…”
“I think you’re imagining things. I’m sure you’ve heard some rumors and made it up. Sometimes you see what you want to see,” I said softly.
“No, they were there, believe me!” Zarina exclaimed, now incensed.
“I think you saw something, but it certainly wasn’t the demons. They can’t go into the village. Our faith… You know how pious we are. How devout you are. Demons dare not come here,” I said slowly.
“They were there!” Zarina screamed and ran out of the room.
“Thank you,” my father said, nodding.
“No need to worry her unnecessarily. We can only pray to the Lord to protect us. But she doesn’t have to worry too,” I said, pressing my lips together.
She had seen the demons. But maybe she could be convinced. Maybe I could make her believe that she hadn’t seen anything bad. Our good Zarina. At least she should be able to live carefree. But was it the right move to keep such horrors secret from her? At what point did we have to admit that life could be terrible and we couldn’t protect her from it?
“Yes. She is still young. Experiencing the evils of the world at her age leaves behind deep scars,” my grandfather said.
I looked at him, saw the wounds he spoke of on his face. I wanted to say something to him, to cheer him up with a psalm, but suddenly there was a banging on the door, panic-stricken.
Who could it be at such a late hour? Who could…
“Help! Help, I need help!”
It was a female voice.
Mary?
What did she want here? She lived at the other end of the village, didn’t she? Why…
“We’re coming!” my father shouted and rushed to the door.
I stood up and followed him. Zarina came rushing out of our room, excited, wanting to see what had happened.
“Get back!” my father hissed, more aggressively than I had expected.
But it had the desired effect. She retreated into our room in surprise, almost like a kicked animal.
I silently thanked my father. We had to protect Zarina. She was almost an adult, but still… she would always be our little Zarina…
Mary’s insane looks silenced my thoughts. She looked awful, breathing bumpily. There were tears in her eyes.
“Help, please, the Popovs…”
The Popovs. Sofia’s family. What had happened?
“Mary, calm down…”
“Come… You have to see it…”
She suddenly grabbed me by the arm and dragged me out of the house. Perplexed, I was pulled across the street, my father running close behind me. I could see that something was wrong immediately. The front door of the house was torn open, and some other people had already gathered in front of the door, probably attracted by Mary’s screaming. Slowly, we approached the house entrance, but… people were not looking inside the house.
They were looking at something lying in the tall grass next to the window, discussing agitatedly and seemingly disgusted. What was going on? Alyone was one of the curious people standing there, of course, and suddenly she turned and threw up, trembling. Mary continued to drag me along behind her until we broke through the small cluster of people that had formed in front of the window next to the front door.
There… lay… something.
Something that inspired disgust and contempt in me, even before I saw it. It was almost just a piece of misshapen flesh, stinking, twitching. It lay next to a round pit in the ground, while bile-like fluid pulsed from a gaping hole in the side of the object. It was grayish, slimy, with tentacle-like long outgrowths that writhed. But the most horrifying thing was not the sight of the thing or the vile smell of vinegar and rotten eggs that emanated from the lump, but… that faint melody….
A soft melody that sounded off-key, dull, gurgling, and wrong. The voice with which the thing sang, strange songs that sounded almost like humming, was sweet, as bright as a bell, and… seemed familiar. I didn’t want to admit it. I didn’t want to admit to myself what I was hearing. I wanted to cover my ears, wanted to run away, to retreat to a place of silence. But I couldn’t. I heard Mary right behind me, crying…
“No, no, it can’t be… I came to see you because of Sasha, he…. But I heard it, I looked and…. And… I had to get help…”
My father stepped past me, a long broom in his hand. He approached the end of it to the thing, slowly, trembling. I looked away from the ground, into my father’s face, not wanting to see, not wanting to see…
I saw from the corner of my eye how he thrust.
I heard him turn the fleshy, ungodly piece of hell on its side.
The next few moments seemed like an eternity, like an eternity spent in purgatory. In my mind, I tried to find the way to the Lord, to be close to Him so that He could deliver me from those moments.
My father’s face became a grimace, and his mouth opened into a bloodcurdling scream that contained disgust, hatred, and despair. He was not the only one. Mary fainted. Several collapsed to the floor, like Alyone, or fell to their knees to pray. In my ears, the melody sounded clearer now. Awfully much clearer…
I had to see it.
I had to see it.
I turned around slowly. I forced myself to look at the floor, at the thing that was under the window.
For darkness is as light to you.
The… something on the floor was tilted on its side. I could now make out on its top, next to the gruesome outgrowths, a human… female… mouth, with pretty, delicate lips, framed by burnt flesh, humming the gruesome tune. I recognized the voice now.
It was Sofia’s voice. It was Sofia’s mouth.
Was… that thing… the rest of Sofia’s body? How did it get here? How did it come to our village? How was that possible? Why… was it still alive? Oh, Lord!
Then, suddenly, the melody stopped, the humming stopped, and the mouth stopped moving. Slowly, as if none of this were real, the fleshy thing began to dissolve. First, it became fine white dust that blew away, then it disappeared completely into the air. All that was left was a slimy puddle.
We didn’t know what to do. Everyone just stood there, stunned, trying to understand, to process the event.
What had been there, on the floor? Sofia? A piece that was left of her rotting corpse? Or something else, alien, otherworldly? Why had it sung? Why had it hummed? Had the devil taken Sofia from the grave? Had the Lord called her back with His divine voice and summoned her here? Had we witnessed a miracle of God and just didn’t understand it? I turned around, needing to avert my gaze from that slimy eyesore. More and more of the other villagers came streaming in through the half-light of the early evening, confused and frightened.
The Lord was testing us!
My gaze wandered back to our house, where Zarina was surely cowering in her bed, fearfully trying to ignore the commotion out here. Fortunately, she could not see this place from our room, but only into the small alley that led to the street. I looked at the old barrels that were standing there, the muddy ground…
Zarina had said she had seen a demon last night, there, right there.
It had not looked at her, had been turned away from her…
I stumbled. If the demon had not looked into the alley but in the other direction…
Then it had looked in the direction of Sofia’s house!
Had it prepared to haunt the Popovs, to drag them into darkness, now that they might have lost faith in the Lord by losing Sofia? That had to be it!
I was sure the demon had sent this piece of hell, which mocked and corrupted the Lord’s message. The sounds, they had not been the Lord’s but an imitation to beguile Sofia’s parents and destroy their faith!
Sofia’s parents…
I winced.
Sofia’s parents, what was wrong with them? Looking around, I couldn’t see them.
“Has anyone seen the Popovs?” I shouted into the crowd.
Only horrified faces, no answer to my question.
And that was answer enough.
The front door of the house was still wide open, and a light was burning inside. They had to be nearby, probably still in the house. The building suddenly seemed distant, the door like the entrance to vents of corruption.
But we had to get in. We had to get into the old building, had to find out what exactly had happened to the Popovs. Had the demons taken them? Had they found refuge with the Lord and been saved? Had they escaped, unnoticed by everyone?
With a deep breath, I started to enter the old wooden house.
Why was it I who started to move while the others just stood there, confused? Why was it me who wasn’t as intimidated by the thing outside the window and as terrified and disgusted as the others?
Was my faith stronger than theirs? Were they all not as devout as I was?
No, that couldn’t be. It was probably just a coincidence. I had to pull myself together.
Next to me, there were now two other men who seemed to have had the same thoughts as me and who now wanted to find out what had happened to the Popov couple. My father and our neighbor, Yuri.
The front door seemed more and more like the gateway to strangeness, to godlessness.
For darkness is as light to you.
The Lord would protect me. Protect us.
We entered the first room, the living room, which was relatively cluttered with wooden furniture. A rather ugly carpet lay on the wooden floor, and old pictures, apparently self-painted, were emblazoned on the walls. The gas stove had not been cleaned for a long time, and cobwebs hung from the wooden beams that ran under the ceiling. The air was stuffy and stale, and the light bulb that emitted a dirty light on the ceiling bathed everything in an eerie contrast. On the dining table lay old ceramic plates with food scraps, on which some eager flies were now feasting. Another wooden door led to the bedroom, where all three Popovs had once spent their nights.
Were they still there? They must have heard the noise, the humming, they must have heard the screams. It couldn’t be that they were still asleep, impossible! Something must have happened.
My father’s hand was suddenly on my shoulder, and I flinched. He pushed past me and motioned for me to be quiet as he pointed to the bedroom door that was ajar. The floorboards cracked under the carpet as we slowly crept past the reeking dining room table. I didn’t know why we were so quiet, why we didn’t just call out into the room, but it felt so… right. It felt like there was something in that room that we shouldn’t draw attention to.
Finally, we reached the door. Sweating, my father put his hand on the handle. I could still hear the chatter of the others outside the house, yet the voices seemed distant, as if they came from far away.
For darkness is as light to you.
The Lord would protect us. He would save us all…
Slowly, my father gripped the handle. Then he pulled the door open.
I could see nothing, only darkness, only blackness. As if the room in front of us was no longer in this world. Vicious, hellish, a deep darkness lay before us.
“Flashlight,” Yuri murmured, standing behind me, handing me a long object.
I let the cone of light travel across the floor and into the bedroom. For a moment, I thought that the light would not penetrate, that it would be engulfed by eternal blackness. But nothing of the sort happened. The cone moved across the threshold and then across the old floor of the bedroom. At first, I was relieved, happy that the Lord’s protection had been with us, but then my father yelped. We all finally crowded into the adjoining room, and with growing horror, I let the light cone slide across the bedroom.
There was nothing left. Nothing at all.
The floor, the walls, the ceiling, everything looked like it had been sanded down. The wooden beams that held up the ceiling were gone; there were no pictures hanging on the walls and no beds to be seen. But it had been the bedroom, of that, I was sure.
But the room, with all its contents, seemed to have simply vanished.
How was that possible?
Were the Popovs here when everything… disappeared? Is that why we didn’t hear them?
I got goosebumps. I had to escape from this unholy, godless place. The dark forces had been at work here, too, had brought hell once more. Had burned out this room with purgatory…
I gulped and turned around. I quickly pushed past the other two and hurried out of the house. Outside, I had to brace myself on my knees and take a deep breath. Sweat was pouring into my eyes.
“What happened to them? What was that…?”
Mary sat not far away, her face still pale. Others were also looking at me questioningly. I felt the fear around me, felt their doubts. I had to reassure them. But how?
“They’re gone. In the house… the bedroom is gone. Gone. The Lord must have taken them, must have sensed their grief…”
“Bullshit!” Mary exclaimed bitterly.
Before I could think clearly, I had gone to her and grabbed her rudely by the collar, pulling her to her feet. I shook her as she gasped in fright.
“They were devout, pious, and they lost their daughter. What else should have happened? What? Can’t you once give succor to people without taking away their hope with your ungodly remarks?” I yelled at her as she choked and began to turn blue.
My father tore me away from her and slapped my face. I slumped, seeing stars in front of my eyes and hearing a roaring in my ears.
“Get a hold of yourself, Ilya! You too, Mary! ALL of you, pull yourselves TOGETHER!” he then roared into the crowd, furious.
“We can’t let them see doubt. The Lord has been protecting this village since we showed Him that we trust Him. So, trust Him! Don’t get carried away with sinful thoughts like anger or contempt. Hold on to your faith, or the demons will…”
He broke off, exhausted.
We knew what he was about to say.
“I’m sorry, Mary, I didn’t mean to…” I murmured, distressed.
“It’s okay…” she said but looked at me with disgust.
“I wanted to talk to you because of Sasha. That’s why I was here in the first place, before I smelled that… thing. I wanted to tell you that he was feeling better and would like to have a drink with you. But I don’t care what you do now. Just get away from me!”
With that, she got up and walked away.
I remained sitting there in the street, in the mud, my head still throbbing. I tasted warm blood. Apparently, my nose had been injured. Someone handed me a towel.
“What do you want to do now?” Yuri asked.
“Go to Sasha, have a drink so that you forget your horrid thoughts,” my father said bitterly, but pity also resonated in his voice, barely audible.
I got up, spat on the floor, and went to Sasha’s, leaving my father and my exhausted neighbors behind.
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Ilya seems to be almost possessed in the latter part of this; his aggressiveness seems really weird. Also, what could have erased that room? The house he is talking about is still there. No one wants to rent it, and when I snuck in two days ago, the room mentioned in the notes is still just a husk. There is nothing left on the spot where they found the weird piece of flesh, but it has been many years since then, so I am not surprised. Still, it feels really bad around there. I will hurry to give you more of the notes. I just hope nothing happens until the next time I post an update. I am starting to get really anxious and stressed…