I woke up with strange pains, and while normally I would be used to this, today felt very different. Pains in my neck and jaw, as if I had slept on it. Pain in my chest, as if the bones itself had begun to hug me. But I still needed to get ready for work. The thought that it was Friday helped be get out of bed. I had worked hard all week and today was the last until I had two whole days to rest. Undoubtedly, I’m going to enjoy watching the rest of my cooking show that I have recorded. With slight optimistism, I got myself out of bed and shambled to the bathroom, like every day.
The bathroom tile usually felt cold and smooth, but I couldn’t feel it. A part of me thought I had socks on, a part of me knew I hadn’t worn socks, but a larger part of me was focused on a different surprise.
As soon as I entered the bathroom, I was ambushed by the sight of a disgusting creature. Pale skin and tall height made me think of a towel at first; but its muscles bulged out like tumors; skin stretched and tore from their unnatural growth; eyes piercing yellow as if light was behind them; its hands were almost human-like, yet its nails had grown so large that they have overtaken the two furthermost knuckles of each finger; the rib cage was almost like scaled armor around the thing’s torso; and the mouth… the jaw had split in two, as if each jaw half was its own prehensile limb; its teeth long and sharp like many daggers, lined up disorderly and erratic.
As I saw it, I screamed, and simultaneously the thing belted out an animalistic hunting cry. I jumped to the floor, like a child seeing a real life monster. I waited for the thing to kill me. But it didn’t. I looked around my bathroom. The thing had left… I was about to get up, when I looked at my hands, about to push me to my feet. They were the hands of the monster, claws meant for hunting. I got up, and saw myself.
I was the monster.
This had to be a dream, none of this was real. I decided to stay in the bathroom until I woke up. It took me almost 5 hours until I got thirsty. I went to the sink, questioning how I could drink without a jaw. I soon discovered my claws were like spoons, they were concave. So I would cup some water, and sucked each claw with the hole that was my throat. It felt natural, while feeling completely inhuman at the same time.
I waited another 9 hours later, when the sun had fully set, I slept on the cold hard tile floor. I prayed to wake up as anything but this creature, but my prayers were pointless.
It took me 5 days to fully come to terms that I was not dreaming. I grew hungry every day, and ate whatever leftovers and produce I could find. Slicing meat was very easy with my new mouth, while eating any vegetables and fruits was almost impossible. Even if I could, I could not taste their sweetness, only the bitter crunch and unappetizing fibrous texture.
I thought about when I would run out of food, and how I would be able to get more. I couldn’t leave the house, I’m already avoiding the windows to prevent being seen.
Weeks passed on, and while I had completely ran out of food, I was staying alive from drinking water. I was very hungry, but I was alive. However, I have no plan on how I would get food right now. Maybe sneak out at night looking for trash? Even then, I’m so large and heavy that I’d be surprised if even a blind person couldn’t notice me passing by. I realized that even my water supply would go away from not paying my water bills.
I guess I’m glad that nobody will be looking for me. If I had any family or friends, a missing person’s report would be made, and result in a man-hunt. I guess there are some perks to solitude.
There were many days where I had nothing left but my thoughts. I asked myself; why had I become this thing. A monster. A part of me didn’t want to think of myself as a monster.
I asked myself what are the limits on what is human? A person who’s lost their arm, many people would call them human. A person with terrible birth defects is still considered human. But, am I still human? Is this mound of horror given flesh and bone still human? I still think like a human, I still act like a human. But nobody would know it was me if they saw me. They’d see a terror on earth. A monster who needs to be killed. I can’t talk anymore, or even make noises that can come off as human. My glottis is completely different, and I sound more like a bear growl combined with a crocodile’s bellow.
Eventually, the day came when my power and my water had gone out. My last means of survival. I had nothing left to help myself. I can either find a way to get food and water, or die. It took me a while to come to terms with this. During that time, I think I saw my landlord come by once or twice. A simple knock on the door and a call of my name, then he left. Even my house will be gone soon. My landlord is going to come in soon, looking for me. And when they see that I’m gone, he’s going to get the house ready for another person, and he won’t expect a nightmare on two legs in their house. I don’t know what to do.
When my hunger became unbearable, I decided to go off at night, looking for trash to eat, and water fountains to drink from. And by the end of the night, I went home to rest all day. I would try my best to hide, but people would still see me eating out of their trash cans, drinking from their water hoses, and some people blamed me for their missing pets. Or, at least I think so, because I stopped seeing pets outside for a while.
My last option for information outside my house and neighborhood was the newspapers that didn’t get picked up during the day. I tried to read, and I could, but I had trouble with recognizing certain letters and numbers. I got b’s and d’s confused many times, as well as p’s and q’s, I felt like a toddler learning to read again. But soon it could read like I usually do, slightly slower though.
Newspapers rarely talked about world events. They talked about me, or possibly another hulking beast that stuck to the shadows during the night. Which isn’t too impossible.
I had become a legend, “The Monster of Oroville”.
When I started to walk for the first few weeks, I stumbled and tripped like a baby. My body was completely unfamiliar to me. But as the weeks passed, and eventually months, I had gotten used to my new body.
I was a pure predator, I could climb trees easier than I could walk, I could run a mile in one breath, I had the strength to pick up logs and push cars. I could see in the dark just as well, if not better than, I could in light. My muscles never got sore, at least never after a meal. I started eating squirrels, roadkill, even slow deer when I had the chance.
I wish I could tell you eating raw and rotten meat disgusted me, but after eating nothing for so long, it tasted like gold. I stopped going back home to hunt for longer. I had gotten more and more confident with how I hunt, now a deer can’t hear me running unless it’s within 5 feet of me. I began prowling the cities, taking extra care not to be seen.
Walking around felt surreal beyond a dream. The architecture felt so alien, as I had been so used to nature at this point. Tall buildings of stone and metal, with people walking through them with no sense of caution, walking as if they couldn’t die. In nature, everything is so close to death that nothing is ever truly confident. I was the only thing who could walk with confidence, but I still knew of my mortality. And seeing everyone else annoyed me slightly. Why was I thinking like this? I knew I didn’t belong here anymore, but I wanted to so badly. I want to wake up from this nightmare.
I saw a butcher’s shop. Months worth of food, right in front of me. I had been hunting my food from this point, but that doesn’t mean I wasn’t hungry. I spent months at this point without a proper full stomach. Even after killing a deer, I could finish one and still have aches in my stomach. But in front of me was so much food that I could never grow hungry again, or at least, this is what I thought.
I became careless, I broke the window and pounced in, feasting on this meal of the gods. I spent hours eating, savoring every bite. I was so absorbed that I couldn’t tell there was a crowd forming outside the butcher’s shop. I’m sure a call went out that someone had broken into the shop. I looked outside, nobody could see in because the shop was completely dark. The entire city had come to see this, wanting to see the legendary “Monster of Oroville”. Most people must’ve thought it was just a bear or other large animal, as most were acting too casually than you would if a monster was in front of you. I could see the police sirens, flashing back and forth.
I realized that I was surrounded. I looked around for a back door, but there wasn’t any. The butcher’s shop only had a front entrance. I was terrified more than ever, more than when I was starving to death, more than when I was hunting deer. I tried to hide anywhere, but I had broken any kind of cover I could’ve had.
I heard a policeman walk up, with his flashlight. He didn’t say, “police, put your hands up.” or anything like that. They were expecting an animal. I felt the blinding light of the flashlight hit my face. Everyone could see the Monster of Oroville.
Panic.
Tens of screams turned into hundreds. The police either ran or immediately took out a gun. I reached my arms out, showing I was surrendering, while trying to say something, anything. The police must’ve seen a monster reach out their arms for an attack, and heard a battle cry that shook their souls. I felt 3 bullets hid my torso, but none of them went past my ribs. A few more hit my shoulder, and it was painful, but nothing like I would expect a bullet to feel like. It felt more like a bee sting. I knew I had to run. So I ran fast. Racing past building after building, street after street. So many people saw me, and each of them ran inside as if the devil himself had come to town. I was fast though. So fast that the police cars couldn’t catch up to me. I jumped wire fences like they were steps on a stool; I ripped through wooden fences like they were paper. Gripping stone walls to scale them was so easy for my claws. Even a helicopter couldn’t catch up. I didn’t know I could run so fast.
I escaped into a forest, but I know that I need to keep going. I can’t stop now, they won’t let me live. I ran until I could see the sun rising. I thought of nothing except the need to run faster. I eventually stopped, and as the sun rose, I found a tree to rest on.
And as I finally rested, I thought to myself. How can I get back to my life? How will I be able to tell everyone that I’m not a monster? But… I am still a human, right? I didn’t hurt anyone, I was hungry. It doesn’t matter how I look, how I sound. Right? Of course. Yes. I am still a human. I am still a human. I kept telling myself this as I drifted to sleep.
I am still a human. I am still a human… I am still… human…