As I write this I am thinking of all my life choices, All the mostly bad I have done. I don’t know how to begin besides introducing myself. I am an American citizen I grew up like a normal kid playing sports, video games and living life. Until I was a teenager. Some background, my mom is of Mexican heritage her parents are from southern Mexico, my dad is a white. Despite this growing up i was just considered Mexican considering my darker appearance and fit in more with the other Mexican American kids at my school. By highschool my Spanish was pretty good although it wasn’t my primary language by far. Eventually I made friends with a new kid. To keep his identity safe I’ll call him a generic name,Jose.jose was a new kid from culican Sinaloa.
He seemed like he was a nice normal kid. However I began to realize his obsession with cartels. He listened to corridos of Sinaloa cartel hitmen religiously. His social media was filled with glorifying Cartels. Golden aks, parties, trucks. I asked him about it which was dumb on my part but I was curious. He was causal about it. He wasn’t a member himself, but he had uncle’s that where memebers and he wished to be one to the dismay of his mom who sent him north with his only non narco uncle. I was uninterested in the life myself and spooked about Hsi ties. That was until tragedy struck. My parents died in a car crash in rainy weather. The only person left to take care of me andy brother was my aunt. My grandparents had passed not long before. All my aunts and uncles had moved and had many of there own to take care of I don’t blame them for making me stay with my young but sick aunt. Long story short I had to make money to support both. It started small, me and Jose did errands and facilitated small deals.
We operated in the USA distributing. It went good until we where kidnapped by men In an all black truck. They took me Jose and another associate while waiting to sell, the third man let’s call him nacho was shaking. They took us to a warehouse in the city. Men wearing streat wear. Soon a man In a thick accent and a suit, the boss entered. He talked to a man in a ski mask with a clear rain jacket covering his clothes. I was scared but soon terrified when I noticed we where kneeling on a plastic sheet. We where gonna be executed. Jose screamed for them to let us go.the executioner walked forward with a bat. He hit nacho first after a full minute nacho was little more then pulp. He got to me I begged. Soon Somone came running in Followed by the boss he talked to the man and he dropped the bat.
“You two got lucky things were cleared”
they explained nacho was helping the rival Jalisco cartel set up operations. They thought we were helping him on his side venture but soon joses uncle cleared things up. We were shaken but it was better than what happened to the man in the suit. He was my bosses boss a high ranking man on the north side of the border. Once joses uncle found out how close to death we where the man was found dead in a drain. We eventually proved ourselves. We moved up in the ranks and were moved to a new post in Sinaloa working under Jose’s uncle’s. I didn’t have much anymore anyway my brother had moved away for college and I cut off contact for his safety the same as any other family. My dear aunt had summoned cancer despite my money paying for chemo it was too late. Soon it wasn’t about helping my family. It was for me. The Glory the parties the women.joses uncle hired bands to sing corridos at mansions owned by him. I lived the life with my best friend. Jose avoided making a family to avoid having something to lose.
I made the mistake and found someone. I dated my girlfriend a year before a rival cartel kidnapped her. I sent all my men working for me to find her. However one day i woke up and was sent a picture from a restricted number. It was her all,you can guess what she looked like if you’ve seen those cartel videos. Blood everywhere. My life took a dark turn from there. I lost violence . I glorified my life more When in reality I should have left after that. My mind wanted revenge but really I had nothing else.
What really made me want to leave was the darkest part of the cartel life. The dark magic. Many men pray to a deity called santa muerte. A cloaked Skelton statue. Many traffickers prayed to her and other saints of trafficking and even the Devil. All to make themselves immune to bullets or lucky. All in exchange for their soul. As my line of work became darker soon the parties alcohol drugs and cars weren’t worth it. Jose saw it differently and he couldn’t get out.
His downfall would be his violence. He brazenly killed a fellow soldier who was meeting with the head of police to buy him out. The police chief had many government connections so Now no just the police but the military were after us. The leadership eventually had his uncle put a hit on him. Had he not been hungover at a party he would have arrived at his house and been killed by a hit squad waiting for him.
I found out and told him he skipped town and left.inhad had it. I knew they would find out I warned him. I left town with all the money. But something felt unfinished so I did the most dumb thing I’ve ever done. I drove the rural road to the Santa muerte altar. Angry at all the power it radiated I defaced it. I snook back into the USA and went on the run. I’ve not heard from Jose since but I’ve been a paranoid wreck. I see shadows and hear whispers.
“I will take your soul for revenge”
She said angry. I’m writing this story unsure now. As I’m writing this it’s snowing. It doesn’t matter this much I reveal about myself right now anyway. As I write from my laptop in the old house I’m staying at in the woods 5 black SUVs are pulling up into my driveway. I’ve prepared myself for this anyway I have pain killers ready to use in the event I’m kidnapped and tortured to death. Besides the shadow behind me has materialized to a physical being, Santa muerte will kill me and collect my soul before the hitmen get to my door.