Hi, my name is Samantha, I think I did something really bad, help me figure out what to do.
First, I´ll give some context on how I was able to do what I did.
My first experience with the supernatural was shortly after my grandmother’s death. Like every 9-year-old, I was still finding out about death, with adults confusing me more than helping. “You go to heaven or hell.” “You will revert to nonexistence, just as you did not exist 100 years ago.” “You will become a cosmic energy that only feels pleasure, wandering around until the end of the universe.” Each relative and acquaintance gave a different answer when I asked. That morbid night, I discovered that there was definitely more to it after we died.
Our family stayed at my late grandmother’s house, now empty with my grandfather having been dead for nearly a decade. The adults stayed in the wake area overnight, and I had my grandmother’s bedroom to myself that night. I couldn’t sleep, sad for having lost my friend, present in all my short life.
Already lying down, but still with my eyes open staring at the ceiling in the dark, I heard footsteps outside the room. I got out of bed and went out into the hallway, but I didn’t see anyone. Upon returning to the bedroom, I turned on the light and froze for a second. Sitting on my bed was my grandmother. Her face flashed with several different physiognomies, alternating age like a faulty slideshow, where one look didn’t last long, but was undeniably the same person. She motioned for me to sit next to her. After the initial shock, I calmed down and obeyed the command. The air, despite being stuffy and a little cold, gave me a feeling of peace and serenity. I sat next to the ethereal figure, who ran a hand through my hair, hugged me and said:
“Sleep well, my love, I love you, I will miss you.” Before disappearing into thin air.
The next morning, I told my parents what had happened, who dismissed my experience as “a child’s overactive imagination”. But I was sure of what I had heard, seen and felt. The dead can talk to us, and I wanted to find out how I could repeat this experience.
An obsession was born.
When I was old enough to be a little independent, I started with my research. With the internet still in its infancy, I did most of the work myself. Among the many charlatans and bad actors, I discovered several cultures that managed to contact the beyond. After a few years jumping between such beliefs (becoming frowned upon in some communities for using them as a learning experience), I put into practice everything I learned, without the hindrances that religions imposed on me.
After several failed attempts, I discovered the importance of place and period. You see, spirits don’t always stay behind, in fact it’s a rare occurrence. They also don’t always respond, they can hear the calls and simply ignore us. Persistence was the key.
The first resounding success occurred when I was 16, after some more “timid” contacts of my invocations, with loose phrases, moving objects or changing the temperature of the environment.
It was a full moon night, I sneaked away from home while my parents had gone to the movies. I met my friends in the square, and after a few minutes of boredom, the suggestion came: To try to have a séance in an abandoned house. Everyone already knew about my obsession with spirits, and all my research and attempts.
We went to the house, which was abandoned because the parents had just been arrested, accused of killing their own daughter. According to the reports, in one of the couple’s fights, the mother took out her anger on the poor child, choking her to death. In an attempt to not get caught, they buried the little girl in their own backyard. I don’t know the reasoning of the 2 geniuses, but obviously, in just over a week, the school contacted the guardianship council, which ended up finding out everything.
Without much effort, we managed to get in through a window. We made a circle with candles and sat down, the 6 friends holding hands around them. In the middle, a vessel with a drop of blood from each present. I did the usual mantra, which I had memorized after several failed attempts. This time, however, almost immediately, every hair on my body stood on end after I uttered the words. The air in the room suddenly cooled down, I felt like I couldn’t move. The noise of cars passing by on the street hushed, as if we’d been placed in a timeless bubble. A sobbing sound broke the silence. When I looked to the side, I saw Eloisa, a friend of mine since childhood, uttering the melancholic sound, despite the fact that no tears came out of her eyes. The mouth expressed a deep sadness, while the eyes, which did not blink, looked confused and surprised. A thin voice, very different from what Eloisa usually has, then came out:
“I’ll behave myself, mommy, please get me out of here.”
The other 5 present in the circle stared at Eloisa, who had her head down. After a few more seconds of silence, she continued, in the same childlike voice:
“It’s dark, I’m scared, mom, talk to me.”
With an indescribable willpower, I managed to interrupt my initial shock, and talk to the voice that came out of my friend.
“Your mother isn’t here. We are your friends. What’s your name?”
Eloisa was still staring at the floor, looking embarrassed. After a few seconds, she slowly lifted her head and faced me. The expression on her face was no longer disconnected, an innocence and shame exuded from my friend, who couldn’t bear to look at me for a long time and turned her face to the ground. When I didn’t receive an answer, I tried to talk to her, calling her by the name mentioned in the article.
“Isabella?”
There was no reaction.
“Isa? Bella? Bel?” On the third try, she moved her face. I continued. “Bel? Your mother won’t come back, my love. Now you are a little angel, God will receive you in his arms.”
When I finished my sentence, the air returned to normal, the sound of cars was heard again, and Eloisa collapsed to the ground, passed out. I ended the séance and went to my friend, who got up a little dizzy, not remembering how she had interacted with us with the childish voice.
After this day, my excitement and obsession increased a lot. I felt like I had acquired a super power. Repeat attempts to contact spirits in subsequent years were successful a little over a third of the time, and I ended up becoming famous at school and in the region as a medium.
After many free consultations with friends and acquaintances, my first offer came up. A rich couple had financed their daughter, Sara, to go to a forest in Argentina, and she never returned, not a single member of the expedition showed signs of life. The forest was extremely inhospitable, and two rescue groups the family had contacted said they would not go there. Before trying to hire another rescue team, the family heard about me. They wanted me to do the séance to see if I could find her in the afterlife. I initially denied it, after all, if the girl had died in another country, the chance of contact was probably zero, the spirit would not be trapped in their house. The large cash offer after my refusal, and the possibility that *maybe* the spirit would return home after death, changed my mind. If I wanted to dream of pursuing a career as a medium, I couldn’t refuse clients this way.
I should have declined.
The séance started normally, the room lit only by candles and the 6 people holding hands, a vessel with blood in the center. Me, two of my “associates”, Sara’s father, mother and brother. The air cooled, becoming heavy and stuffy. Usually the spirit’s message comes from one of my two associates, who have an incredible reception, Eloisa and Algelaine. Then my job is to talk to the invoked spirit. This time, however, who spoke first was Sara’s brother. The thin, feminine voice coming out of that boy sent shivers down the spines of those present.
“Mother? Mommy?”
The mother immediately watered her eyes, and replied with a trembling voice:
“Yes, honey. Where are you?”
“I’m here, Mom. Come, hug me.”
The mother made a move to undo the circle, I held her hand tightly and shouted:
“NO! You cannot undo the circle.”
She made an expression of understanding.
“You’re not here, my love. You went into that forest and you haven’t spoken to us in months.”
“Oh, right, Mom, I remember now.”
“Remember what?”
“Where I am.”
The boy stared at his mother, robotic smile and unnatural expression.
“And where are you?” The mother swallowed dry, trying not to cry.
“I’m in the woods, Mama. You have to see how beautiful I look , natural, with the worms and insects eating my hot little body.”
The mother couldn’t hold back anymore and started to cry. I froze with the spirit’s phrase; I had never seen a dead person speak like that. With the mother still in shock, the spirit continued:
“Do you know why I came on this excursion, Mom? I wanted to make out with Nicole, that hottie, but you wouldn’t let me, would you? You’d kick me out of the house if I showed up holding hands with her, so I had to get away from you. And now I ‘m here, lying on the ground. It’s your fault, Mom, it’s your fault.”
Her mother’s voice cracked, alternating between murmured and projected syllables:
“That’s a lie, it’s a lie… I loved you; I would accept you the way you were. The… the way you are.”
The boy with the girl´s voice was laughing, seeming amused and angry at the same time:
“Don’t lie to me, Mom, I hear you. I’ve been looking at you all day, I know what you’re like, now more than ever. I know about your friend’s visits, but how can I blame you, right? You’re so lonely, you can’t take Daddy disappearing and reappearing after two days, time after time.”
The father let go of my hand violently and jumped on his son, I couldn’t contain him. The air returned to normal, and the son, even before his father’s first blow, was passed out on the floor, not moving. This calmed the father down a bit, who stopped his aggression and just stood there, tears streaming, as did the mother, who was also crying inconsolably. A servant of the house escorted us out, and we left without saying anything.
This disaster of this séance made me learn how dangerous it can be to try to contact the other side. It’s not just the dead who respond, there are other beings and entities trapped there, waiting for an opportunity to interact with humans.
I passed in front of that house a month later, there was a “for sale” sign. I don’t know exactly what happened after we ended the séance like that, but it must have been bad enough that the family didn’t want to stay in that house anymore. At night, even with the house being supposed to be empty, I see faces in the windows, lights flickering and hear banging noises, even from the street, I can´t even imagine how bad it is inside the house.
I feel guilty, I think I should try to fix what I did, maybe talk to the family, even after being kicked out on that day, trespass the “for sale” house to try to clean it from whatever I summoned there. What do you guys think? Am I the asshole here? Should I try to redeem myself?