There are allergies that I bet none of you have heard of. A few seem common, like nuts or eggs, but other allergies, like water, you wouldn’t expect to be possible. Right? And even if it were, how would anyone survive with that type of curse? It is real, and it’s called aquagenic urticaria. There are only 50 medical instances known to science, and most of the people who have it have lived longer than you would expect.
I’m not one of these people, but I have a condition far rarer. It is called Solisphobia pronusirrita. It is a condition, and I am the only documented human to have ever had it. When I was born, my mum told me that the moment the doctors put me in the nursery, the sun rays from the window hit my skin, and I immediately started to bawl my eyes out like I was about to die. While I was screaming, the doctors came and saw that my skin, where the sun had been exposed, was turning a light purple and grey.
Immediately, they took me into a more closed area, and they diagnosed me with Xeroderma pigmentosum. It is a condition where you are irritated by sunlight. Not like what I have, more like you get sunburnt really easily.
After around 3 days in the nursery, I was taken home with my loving mum and dad. As a baby, they said I was more silent than they expected. I only made noise when I needed something or had to go to the bathroom. They recounted my only experience as a baby when I cried, and that was when I accidentally went outside because they forgot to shut the baby gate. When I made it outside, they said they heard the most high-pitched, ear-piercing wail they had ever heard. When they rushed out, they found me on the ground covered in splotches of purple and grey. They immediately dialled 911, and I was rushed to the emergency room.
When the doctor saw what had happened, he started to explain the severity of my condition. He said that with Xeroderma pigmentosum, some babies experience intense sunburns, and I was likely going to have to be treated with mild burns. When they took a closer look, however, they noticed I had no burns; my skin colour had just been altered. Obviously, this was nothing like they had seen before, so they started to document my state in case I had a new, undiscovered condition that needed to be documented for studies later on.
When I was being treated, the doctor noted that the disease was hereditary. However, my dad quickly pointed out that nobody in either of our families had this condition. The doctor was obviously stunned and thought I had a new condition. After 3 days of treatment, they diagnosed me. I was allergic to sunlight. My parents immediately fought against this, stating that it simply could not be possible. They thought allergies were only related to pets or food. But the doctor calmed them down and explained to them what it was. “Your son does not have Xeroderma pigmentosum; it’s purely hereditary, and he isn’t showing any symptoms.” What we have decided on is that your sun has an extremely severe skin sensitivity to sunlight. Xeroderma pigmentosum doesn’t just apply to the sun; very bright and powerful light can have the same effect, even in cold environments.
My parents were devastated. They had to take a break and leave the room while more tests were held to see what was truly wrong with me. Finally, after a full week, I was back home with mum and dad. I was around 2 by this point and had started to walk. The next three years were very uneventful for me. The only notable thing that happened was that my dog died. We held a small funeral for him and buried him in the backyard. I was 4 at the time and can vaguely remember choking on my tears as I sat inside and heard the shovel scraping against the soil and rock that became my best friend’s tomb.
I didn’t go to preschool. My parents decided it was too dangerous, and the only preschool I could go to was around a 15-minute drive away. The school was much closer, however, so my parents thought it’d be safer and decided to let me go. They told me that they had a heavy argument over homeschooling but eventually agreed that if any incidents happened, I would be taken out of school and put in a damp room to be taught my ABCs by my own mum.
On my first day, I sat in the room. My condition was only known by the teachers, and they made sure I stayed indoors away from any open windows on a sunny day. By the time the day was over, I felt upset already. I wanted to go outside and play; I wanted to have fun. Unfortunately, the choice of death or a few minutes of fun was completely different, so I managed to get over it after a few weeks.
That’s when the first incident happened, however. I was in my class when the teacher left, and out of curiosity, I followed her. Immediately, I felt a tingling on my arm, and then the numbness started to overflow my senses. I felt nothing at all as my arm started to turn a concrete grey, and I immediately ran into the room, crying as I rubbed my arm. The only thing I could feel was a slight tingle and an almost icey coldness from my touch. After around 30 seconds, the teacher came in and saw my arm. She let out an audible gasp, but before she could do much, the bell went off. She couldn’t get me out of the room because of the sun, so she called a nurse.
As the kids flocked in, they saw my condition and started laughing. I still remember the high-pitched voices squabbling among themselves. One of them came forwards, pointed at me, and said, “HE’S A VAMPIRE GUYS, GET AWAY.” And everyone in the room sort of stepped back and kind of ran out of the class, either laughing, screaming, or even crying. That was the day the bullying started. I was eventually shielded with some loose blankets and taken home. I was crying in the car as I overheard mum and dad say, “We have to take him out of that fucking school. It must be hell for the little guy to be forced to stay inside and do nothing.” My mum piped up and said, “Maybe we should give it one more chance. Hopefully it won’t happen again. Please, Danny, he needs an education!” My dad sighed and pondered for a minute before replying: “Fine, 1 more chance. If it happens again, we will take him out of that school.
I felt ecstatic as my dad said that I had another chance. However, I wasn’t aware of the amount of harassment and bullying that was to come later down the line.
After a week, I came back to school. I had been given an umbrella to walk around with in the sun. Sometimes small rays would hit my finger and it would sort of burn for a second before it faded, but apart from that, I had no issues. When I made it to class, I pulled my umbrella down and rested it on my leg. Instantly, one of the kids behind me picked it up and said loud enough for everybody to hear: “I didn’t know vampires needed umbrellas; I thought they just lived in coffins.” Everyone started to laugh as I cried. This went on for 8 years, until I was 14. The bullying had only gone as far as verbal harassment until I got to high school. I got lots of judgemental and even fearful looks as I walked around with the umbrella. It didn’t take long till people called me a vampire or concrete, and it was devastating. I thought I would finally fit in at high school, only to be tormented on a daily basis and feel ashamed of my own body.
After two weeks, my mind started going to dark places. I felt worthless and miserable, as if it were my own fault for being who I am. When I got home after another terrible day of harassment, I felt the urge to harm myself. I didn’t attempt to fight it as I lined myself up at the window. When my arm reached into the piercing rays of light, my body tensed, and I felt anxious. The pain was mild at first but quickly started to elevate as I started to sweat intensely. After around 30 seconds, I pulled my arm away and saw that the part of it that was affected was almost black.
I started to cry as the horrific sight stared back at me. Then panic set in as I realised the colour wasn’t fading like before. In a panic, I got the biggest hoodie I could find and put it on. The pain stayed mild, like a buzz. It was the same feeling as a small needle going into your body over and over, constantly.
When mum called for me to come to dinner, I started to panic even harder. How was I going to hide any of this?” I thought as I creeped down the stairs. Every squeal and creak of the wood made me more anxious as I was greeted with the smell of freshly cooked meat. When I sat on my chair, my mum noticed my expression and said, “Everything okay, hun?” Out of panic, she would find out, and I almost immediately replied, “Yeah, Mum, just school being stressful, y’know?” She nodded her head, and as we ate, I started to feel at peace. Maybe they wouldn’t find out, and the marks would eventually go away. While I was eating my food, I went to reach for my glass of water, and I knocked my fork onto the ground. On instinct, I reached down and grabbed it. When I sat back up, my sleeve rolled down, revealing the mark.
Immediately, my dad said, “James, What is that on your arm?” His tone was extremely threatening. I started to cry, and my mum forcefully grabbed my sleeve and rolled it up, revealing the mark. “NO STOP!” I screamed with tears in my eyes. “What is this, James?” WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT ON YOUR ARM?” It’s a burn from the sun. “HOW DID YOU GET IT?” My mom’s shrill screams made me sob louder as I choked out the answer: “I did it on purpose.” My mum started to tear up as I ran to my room. That night, mum and dad argued. “IF JAMES IS GOING TO FUCKING BURN HIMSELF, WE HAVE TO TAKE HIM TO THERAPY!” My mum screamed. The walls made it muffled. “WHAT IS THAT GOING TO DO?” my father yelled back. “All that will do is make him feel like it’s his fault for how people treat him.”
When I finally faded off to sleep, I had a nightmare about me stepping into the sun and fading to nothing but a shadow.
When I woke up, Dad was gone, Mum had massive black bags under her eyes, and she was smoking at the dinner table while she was on the phone. “Danny left. He’s at his mom’s right now. James has been having a rough time.” My mum choked on her tears. I went back up to my room as quietly as possible. I started to get ready for school. It took everything I had not to cry as I walked downstairs. My black scar was still there. I sighed in anxiety as I grabbed my umbrella and walked outside. I felt small tingles as small rays of sunshine hit me, but I ignored the pain as I walked to school. When I arrived, the usual fuckface that tormented me was out front. His name was Brayden. He immediately shoved me and noticed the scar. “What the fuck is that?” He grabbed my arm tightly as he investigated it. “You’re a fucking freak, James. How do you even come to this school? I don’t get it” Rage pitted in my stomach and mind as I shoved him. “Fuck you,” I replied back in anger. “Oh, you want to go?” He put his fists up. I sighed; I didn’t even care anymore. Life wasn’t getting any better. Punches started getting thrown. I was hitting him hard, but he hit harder, and I started to feel dizzy. Like a sombre scene, rain started to pour as we fought. He managed to pin me on the ground and was pummelling me. As a last resort, I felt for a loose rock and found one. As the hard surface hit his head, I heard the sound of squishing and cracking. He fell off me unconscious, and when I got up, I noticed blood on my clothes. The rain has started to pour now.
When I got up, I saw that there was a massive crack in his head. His eyes were open, but he wasn’t breathing. I ran so fast that I felt my legs literally melting. As I finally turned a corner, I started to cry. The crying audibly stopped as I looked at my arm. The scar was gone, but the thing that had me in shock was that there were small droplets of rain with a black shade. The scar had been washed off. I didn’t shower that morning or that night, so it had not been washed off. I stared at the sight and started to cry. What was happening anymore?
I saw a massive semi come barrelling down the road in front of me, and that was when I made the life-changing decision to cut things short. I hoped I would reincarnate as something beautiful and live a normal life as I ran in front of it. The last thing I remembered
I woke up in a white hospital bed. The lack of colour almost reminded me of heaven until I saw the doctors. The IV drips and my mum and dad crying next to me I couldn’t speak; all I could do was sit there, barely able to see. I remember blacking out again. This time, I saw some things. I saw a bright light, and I remember feeling the same pain as the sunlight hitting my flesh. The smell of sulphur and heat filled my nostrils with a sour feeling.
Then, out of nowhere, I blinked, and I was in front of this light. The smell and feeling were so intense that I started screaming, but no sound came out. The pain started to amplify as I moved closer, unwillingly. I heard a voice boom out of nowhere, spooking me. “You are my only weakness.” It took me a minute to realise what was happening, but I figured it out. The light was speaking. “You are my only weakness,” it repeated. This “entity” was speaking to me. I could understand it. “W-What are you?” I replied back. “I am sün. I am a god, which you all bow to. I provide your land with light in return for a host. I was so confused. None of this is real. The sun wasn’t actually alive, right? “What do you need from me?” I replied shakingly. This entity replied back. “I want you to agree not to interfere with me in exchange for your curse being lifted.” I sort of zoned out as it spoke like it was hypnosis. I snapped back, however. “Anything.. please! I want my life to be normal. I don’t know what I’ve done to you, but I won’t do anything, I swear.” This all felt like a bad trip on acid; I didn’t believe this was real for a second. This entity made the sound of someone going “mmm,” and it said, “I agree. You will be healed when you wake up. Your curse will be lifted. These are the only words a mortal has spoken to me and is likely going to speak to me for eternity.” A flash of light then flickered as I awoke. My parents noticed me waking up and immediately hugged me. “He’s awake. My James is awake.” They sounded much less happy, but I could tell they were holding in emotions.
It’s been 10 years since that day. I do not suffer from that “condition” anymore. I can be in the sun, but I still feel uncomfortable under the rays of that entity. I was sent to prison for the self-defence man slaughter of Brayden for six years.
I don’t know what life is anymore. Every day I ponder about that experience. The doctors said my condition must have been either cured or immunised. I don’t know where to go at this point. I can’t even say anything about it either. Whenever I try to tell someone, I feel my body tense and feel the sting of sunlight. That scar I had is still discoloured. It’s not black, but that area of skin is much darker than the rest.
Not all allergies are natural. Some are curses provided by higher forces that do not want to be recognised.