I used to have severe arachnophobia. Just looking at the things made me gag, let alone the thought of approaching one. Did you know that they only have the muscles to pull their legs back? To step forward, they pump juices through their limbs to extend them, like grotesque hoses forever writhing forward.
I managed to deal with my fear, mainly by avoiding the things as much as possible. I’d sweep up the cobwebs in my apartment when their owners weren’t home to protect them. If, god forbid, I did find a living spider, I’d spray a healthy dose of bug killer and quarantine the whole room for a few days. I was scared of spiders, but I could at least clean up their corpses.
Unfortunately, that method stopped working when I moved to my new place. As a young lady, I’ve never felt comfortable living alone on the first floor of an apartment, but with rent rising… I didn’t have much choice. I got a window alarm system and some stuck to prop against my front door. I felt safe enough.
Until the first spider appeared in my bathroom. I nearly leapt out of the shower when I saw it lurking in the corner of my ceiling, watching. I stared it down with revolted defiance as I snatched my towel and backed out of the room. I grabbed my trust insecticide and sprayed from a safe distance— but when the thing twitched and shot into motion, I dropped the can and slammed the door shut.
Normally I like to keep a room quarantined for at least a few hours, if not a full day. But with only one bathroom… Well, I didn’t have much choice. When I peeked in, the spray can was there. The spider was not. I carefully poked around in any dark areas, but it was completely gone.
The spider sightings started popping up more and more frequently after that, but, for some reason, my tried and true spray-and-run method wasn’t killing any of them. They were in every room every day, often more than one despicable creature. They were in my bedroom, my kitchen. Watching me. I work from home, and my once-peaceful home turned into my worst nightmare. I couldn’t get away from them.
I got new insecticides, I complained to the complex enough that they sprayed the whole area outside of my apartment. I replaced the door seal, the window seals, filled every tiny hole I could find. I don’t know what else I could have done. I would have moved, if I could have afforded it.
They kept coming. More and more. There were at least 10 spiders across my apartment when I snapped. I couldn’t live like that. Every time something brushed against me, I’d jump out of my skin, thinking it was a spider. I found one on my pillow. It stared at me. I slept on the couch.
But you’re here for my cure, right? Did you know that you can purchase bugs online? Some are feeders for reptiles or other pets, some are pets themselves. Supposedly. I bought some. I bought a lot.
If I couldn’t get away from the spiders, I could at least desensitize myself.
When the boxes came, I took them to my bedroom. Seven or eight spiders watched from my walls as I carefully unpacked each container. 345 spiders in total of different breeds. I opened them all at once, then dumped them on the bed. I turned off the light. I crawled in with them.
They clambered over my shaking body as tears spilled from my tightly-shut eyes. I could feel each and every disgusting, revolting leg as it touched my bare skin. Fear paralyzed me - until they started scuttling up my face. I screamed. Spiders fell into my mouth. I gagged, feeling their hairy bodies on my tongue. My eyes popped open and were immediately swarmed.
I passed out.
When I woke up, there were only a dozen or so spiders on me. The rest had made themselves comfortable on my walls, in my cabinets, on everything I owned. But to my surprise and joy, I didn’t mind. I didn’t mind when I found them on my pillow. I didn’t mind when I found one swimming in my cereal. Extra protein, right?
Now it’s like I’ve got four or five hundred pets with me. It’s hard to keep a count, especially with so many eggs hatching lately.
Give it a try if you’re afraid of spiders too.