It’s been 20 days since my brother disappeared. The police, as always, are useless. Alin, by his name, went on a mountain expedition, the motive being a good one. Alin was getting so stressed at work that problems were starting to appear at home. I don’t know all the reasons, but according to him, he was no longer paying attention to his wife and daughter. His situation had started to worsen, so much so that there were times when he didn’t even come home, not wanting to hear screams and various objects breaking around the house. He often slept wherever he could, and why lie, even I put him up for a few nights. You can probably imagine what happened next, in his absence, his wife eventually cheated on him.
Alin was devastated, he didn’t know what to do next, he didn’t know how much alcohol to pour into him in various bars, and how much money to throw at easy women. No, he wasn’t like that all his life, on the contrary, all my life, I knew Alin as a very controlled person, being master of himself, and weighing every insignificant thing in his life. But he wasn’t made of steel, as any man, at some point, can lose control. Which he did, making a man of all respect a wretch that no one would have given a penny for. At least, nobody but me.
That’s why, in his darkest moments, I stood by him, and tried to guide him to a better path. I still remember that night I sat with him talking, just like two brothers. I pitied him, tried to cheer him up. I remember how we would reminisce, and how different scenarios would run through our minds about how we had a wonderful childhood, about how we used to get beaten up by our parents when we were fooling around, oh, and how beautiful the summers we spent in the country were, when we would walk through the woods, looking for the most beautiful acorns to take home. Indeed, we had a beautiful childhood. Suddenly, Alin gave me a look as if he had found the answer to all my questions. He told me how he longed to go on an expedition to the mountains, how he wanted to camp and eat meat cooked by the fire in the evening in the silence of the forest. He would tell me how much he longed to feel that cool air as he woke up, or how nice it would be to fall asleep in a summer rain, the sprinkles falling melodiously on the tent.
He said this was the answer, that it would make him forget all the trouble that had taken over his life. Going off on his own to a place far from civilization wasn’t something I’d advise him to do, but at times like this, I knew that whatever made him happy was a step towards better. We sat and reminisced some more, and Alin seemed to be getting happier. All he was waiting for was to come in the morning to make preparations for his big departure. Which he did. Within 2 days, I wished him a safe journey, and most importantly, to take care.
The days were ticking away, and I had not heard from him. No phone calls, no messages, not even letting me know he’d arrived. Nothing. That’s when I realized something was wrong. The shipment was not supposed to last more than 3 days, the food wouldn’t be enough. Of course, like any normal person, I notified the authorities. They even sent out a patrol to look for him, but to no avail. Alin was nowhere to be found, he seemed to have disappeared from the face of the earth. The police didn’t close his file, but when they found out about him, they thought he had taken his own life. I was sick of their ignorance, for them it was just another boring case, which probably prevents them from fining old people selling vegetables illegally on the street. I couldn’t accept it, I couldn’t imagine that Alin would ever do such a thing. I knew him too well, I knew he would never think of such things. For days, I tried to contact his family, but no answer. I kept pressing the calls, until I was completely blocked by his wife, or whatever they were now. I couldn’t leave Alin, he was my brother, I couldn’t accept that he was lost somewhere in the mountains, I couldn’t accept the ignorance that everyone was showing.
So, in the next few days, I took heart and went in search of him. In a backpack, I carefully placed an external battery, a spare phone, a blanket, a radio that picked up different stations like a portable radio, a flashlight, enough food for 3 days, and 4 bottles of water. I was determined, I was going to find Alin at any cost. The drive to the mountains was pretty uneventful, and didn’t take very long either, I think about 2 hours by car. I didn’t even have to listen to any podcasts on the way, or I don’t know what songs, thoughts were running through my head, so many scenarios about what could have happened to Alin. Before I knew it, I was at my destination. I realized it when the thick green forest appeared in front of me. I got out of the car, checked that I hadn’t forgotten anything, then locked it, and went on my search.
I started looking around, trying to look for signs that someone had been there, but nothing. Leaves were strewn on the ground, giving no impression that anyone had actually walked over them, not even a path. I went on my way, engrossed in thought, and the sounds of birds. I must have patrolled for 2 hours, and no sign of Alin. Time was short, and the evening was rushing on, the thick leaves of the trees, not helping. Finally, I decided to camp on a hill, thinking that if I was higher up, I would be safe. I spread out my blanket and ate a sandwich, then lay back and looked up at the starry sky that was becoming more and more visible. Before I knew it, I was asleep.
I think it was around 1am when the station in my backpack woke me up. From it, there was a sound that startled me, but still left me confused, as I couldn’t figure out what it was. I grabbed it and tried to change the frequencies, hoping I’d run into that sound again, but nothing.
Can anyone hear me? Come in, can anyone hear me?
I got no response. Absolutely nothing, it’s like that sound came out of nowhere, and that’s where it went.
I checked my phone, but the only thing it showed was the signal list and the late hour. I tried to go back to sleep, with difficulty, but I managed. In the morning, I continued my search. I walked around, I shouted, but to no avail, there was no one to hear me, in fact, no one to answer me. I kept thinking about Alin, where he could be, what happened to him, and of course, the worst case scenarios, where he was lost in the woods, with no food or water, or someone who could help him. Between you and me, he was never a good scout, he liked the idea of camping, fishing, but he wasn’t good enough to do it himself. That’s where I came in, being a helper for him, I was always more handy, finding different solutions in the hardest times, not him.
I came to regret influencing him, telling him that it was a good idea to go off alone like crazy in the mountains, looking for peace of mind. But what was to be done, the man was a wreck, I didn’t want to spoil that little thought. The thought that made him disappear into the woods, with who knows what thoughts. The more I searched for him, the more I tried to track him down, the thoughts that he had committed suicide in the woods, or that he had starved to death, began to race through my mind. Don’t judge me, he was my brother, I wanted his best, maybe that’s why I was projecting my darkest scenarios. Another fruitless day, I couldn’t afford to stay in the forest, especially as the food was almost gone, and I didn’t know if 2 bottles of water would be enough for another day.
In the evening, when darkness took hold of the mountains, I decided to go to bed early, because if I stayed up late, my body was demanding food, and I couldn’t afford to finish it, every second I looked for my brother, I was closer to finding him, at least, that’s what I thought. At times like this, I had to be optimistic. I laid my blanket on the floor, put my phone on charge, and slowly but surely, I fell asleep.
But my sleep, was to end at 3:33 in the morning, when from the station, a sound broke.
It wasn’t human, and I’m pretty sure there wasn’t a source in that area that made that sound. I don’t know, it sounded like a megaphone redirected the most awful siren sound through the station. No, I’m not rambling, that’s exactly what it sounded like. Before I knew it, I was sweating, I was overcome with fear. Alone in the woods, hearing a sound whose source you couldn’t identify, was too much for me. I couldn’t fall asleep, so I took my phone out of my pocket, and tried to calm myself, looking for different pictures or videos in the gallery, at least, time was passing, as long as it was light outside, and I continued my search. Unfortunately for me, but also for Alin, this was the last day I could spend in the forest, the smell of food and water making me go back home. I was pressed for time, therefore, the only way I could go was to the car, but I decided to detour a bit the route I came, thus, going through unexplored areas, and increasing my chances to find Alin.
Oh, and don’t think I walked a little, in any case, the walk to the car, by my estimates, was at least 6 hours, that’s in the happy case. On the way, I kept chattering at the station, hoping someone would pick me up, but to no avail, the silence was oppressive, and the fact that I couldn’t find any sign of Alin didn’t help at all. I was beginning to lose hope, but I didn’t want to believe that my brother was lost, I just didn’t accept it. I couldn’t allow myself to accept it, he was still the person I grew up with, he was always there for me when I needed him, and now, when he needed me the most, I wasn’t there for him. It was like looking for the needle in the haystack. God how I tried to think that by some miracle, he would come home, but I knew I was lying to myself. Overtaken by such thoughts, I didn’t notice the hillside in front of me, where I slipped, tumbling into a tree, only to lose consciousness. I was awakened by the sound of the station, which reproduced that…
I don’t even know what else to call it, that sound that froze the blood in my veins. Only this time, the sound was clearer, so clear, I was beginning to think it wasn’t coming from the station. I reached into my pocket for my phone, but it was nowhere to be found, I struggled to get my flashlight out of my backpack, looking for it, but in those thick leaves, I couldn’t find anything even the size of my backpack, but a phone, in any case, most likely, it was unloaded, because from the backup phone, I tried to call myself, but all around me there was nothing, only silence.
Maybe too much silence, in this area of the forest, it was unnaturally deserted. I don’t think I heard any birds on the way to the car, not even crickets could be heard. Something wasn’t right, and I could feel it in my bones. You know that feeling where one day you’re doing really well, and you expect something bad to happen? Or like when you feel like something’s not right, but you can’t figure out what, well, that’s how I felt. Something was sinister, I felt like something was wrong. I picked myself up off the ground, shaking off the leaves, when on my hand, I felt something move. I thought it was most likely an insect, but I wished it was one.
With the light of the flashlight, on my hand, I could see a black drop of blood, trickling down to my fingers. And no, it wasn’t mine. I aimed the flashlight at my feet, but it hadn’t fallen on anything. I looked around, only to notice the strange shape of the trees, they were so dry, their branches in chaotically abnormal positions. My heart was pounding as I decided to look up. There, hanging from a tree, with his own organs, hung Alin, or what was left of him. His head was the only thing I could make out, because half of his body was missing. In an instant reaction, I threw up the last bit of food I had had in the last two days. I was so exhausted, both physically and mentally, that I fainted. But not before I heard the station go crazy.
Suddenly, I wake up in the car, right at the entrance to the forest. What the hell happened? Did I fall asleep in the car? Was it all just a dream? I opened my backpack, absolutely everything was there, food, water, the station, even the blanket. I tried to console myself with the fact that I fell asleep as soon as I arrived, and that the journey was very tiring, I was probably too tired, and that made me tired.
But I wasn’t dreaming, it was all so real, I remember exactly every bit of the route, hell, I remember how I found Alin. I put my hands to my head repeating to myself that it wasn’t true. But just then, I saw the detail I’d been missing all this time. On my hand, I saw the trace left by that black drop of blood. I wasn’t dreaming, but it didn’t make sense, why was I in the car? Why do I remember every detail? I took my phone out of my pocket, looked at the date, it showed me that not even a day had passed, and I was still in the first one. Having a signal, I decided to call Alin, but…I didn’t have his number saved in my phonebook. I entered the gallery, I had so many pictures, and none with Alin. I called his wife, but I was still blocked. What the hell is going on? Scared, I went home, didn’t know what the hell was wrong with me, didn’t know what was real and what wasn’t.
Once I arrived, I searched all over the house for pictures of my brother, but nothing, no trace of Alin, including the pictures of the two of us, they were gone. I went to the police, asking for the report about him, but they didn’t know what I was talking about, I almost got a fine for the fuss I made. I was looking for even the smallest proof, that this man I was looking for existed, my work colleague Adelin disappeared and nobody knows what happened to him. It’s been days, and no sign of Adi. It’s as if the world has simply forgotten about this man, although, I’m pretty sure he existed. People start glancing at me, at work, I’m seen as the ultimate freak. Why the hell is this happening to me? I feel like I’m losing myself, I feel like all the alcohol in the world isn’t enough. To hell with my wife, cheating on me like that? In my house?
I don’t know, I feel like I’m going to hell, I don’t know how I got in this situation, but I need to change something, I need a change.
(phone rings)
Yeah?
Alin, it’s me, Stefan, I heard what happened to you, if you want, you can come over, we’ll talk, maybe have a drink.
I accepted, I think a chat with my brother wouldn’t hurt. So that night, I stayed at his place. I remember how we talked about our childhood, and what a beating we used to get from our parents. We remembered looking for acorns in the woods. That’s when I realized that’s what I needed to get back on my feet, a hike in the mountains near our town.