My family was always seen as perfect; the American dream. Everyone in town was jealous of Matt, Laura, and little Raegan Mcmanis. Matt, my father, was a successful businessman who volunteered at the soup kitchen on Saturdays and donated money to the poor. Laura, my mother, was a socialite in town, and spent her extra time as a seamstress, making all her husband and daughter’s coats from scratch. And as for me, Raegan, well, I was a straight A student, and captain of the cheerleading squad at school. We were almost like characters in a movie. But real life is different from movies, and I for one knew the truth about our family. Our reputations and personalities were all paper-thin, much like the walls in our house.
I knew about dad’s affair. I knew about mom’s secret liquor stash. They acted like I wasn’t aware of their fighting, but they would argue almost every night. And, due to how loud their arguments were, I even knew about mom’s plan to leave dad.
“Matt, I’m sorry. I can’t deal with this anymore.” She said after they screamed at each other for an hour or two.
“What about Raegan? What are we going to do about her, huh?” Dad yelled.
“Oh, for crying out loud, she’s 16 years old, she’ll be out of the house in two years! She’s not a child anymore. She doesn’t need us.” My mom said, near tears.
I stayed crouched by the staircase, just like I did when I was a little girl. This was one of the biggest arguments they had. The neighbors probably could’ve heard them.
“We’re done, Matt, okay? I’ll go pack my bags. Tell Raegan where to find me.” My mom finally said. Neither of them were yelling anymore. Both were calm.
My dad sighed. “Okay. If you insist. But one thing-” I watched as he grabbed a bottle of wine from the shelf. “One more drink together. To celebrate our years of marriage.”
My mom looked around. “One glass. But after that, I’m packing my bags.” she said, rubbing her temples.
Dad turned around to get the corkscrew for the wine. For a moment I saw his face contorted from melancholic to enraged, and all in a blur, I watched him turn back around and swing the wine bottle at her head before I could warn her. I stared on in horror as he grabbed a broken piece of glass off the ground and slit her throat. As the blood gurgled out of her, I raced back upstairs into my bedroom, acting like I had been there the whole time.
Maybe if I shut my eyes and try to fall asleep, I thought, I’ll wake up and realize it was all a dream.
But part of me knew that what I saw really happened, and I slowly had to come to terms with the fact that my dad had killed my mom.
Even still, when I went downstairs in the morning, I half expected my mom to be in the kitchen, cooking up pancakes and bacon for our Sunday breakfast.
What I didn’t expect was my dad in the kitchen, holding up my mom’s limp body, the floor still a mess of glass, wine and blood.
“Oh, hello Raegan, you’re finally awake. Mom’s sorry-no pancake breakfast for us today. She had a big night last night and was just too tired to make us food. I hope cereal works.” His voice had an eerie calm to it, and it was only then that I truly processed what was going on. One look at my mom confirmed she was dead. My dad had sewn up the gash on her neck, and her pale, gaunt face stared back at me.
“D-dad? Is mom okay?” I asked, trying to mask my terror with concern. Maybe if I played along, it would be easier.
“Raegan sweetie, I just told you. Mommy’s feeling tired.” He said, rubbing his hand on her forehead.
Mommy? I hadn’t called mom mommy in about ten years.
“Maybe a hug from her daughter would help her feel better.” He continued, pulling the limp body closer to me. I noticed a swarm of flies flying around near her, and a few of them flew into her ears and nose. I stared into her eyes, barely open. Dad seemed to notice my staring at them, because he grabbed her eyelids and forced them open.
“Go on, honey. Hug your mother.” He said.
I looked at him, then back at her.
“Goddamnit Raegan, hug your fucking mother!” Dad said, throwing her entire wight onto me at once. I toppled over and both mom and I fell to the floor.
Dad walked over and gently grabbed my hands, wrapping them around my mom’s cold body.
“There we go. Good job, Raegan.” He said calmly.
Things only got worse from there. Mom’s skin changed colors, and her teeth and nails fell out. The flies began to rule over our house, and I felt like they doubled every day. Did anyone ever tell you how bad corpses smell? It’s not a smell you can get used to. It’s all around me.
And worst of all, dad seemed to be going mental.
He danced with my mother at night, dragging her bloated body around as if nothing had ever happened. He would feed her at the dinner table, causing rotting food to accumulate in my mom’s mouth, making the smell even worse. Every night he’d force me to kiss my mom goodnight, just like I had to when I was little. Sometimes I felt like I could taste the rot on my lips.
I tried to talk to him about it.
“What do you mean?” he asked, running his fingers through my mom’s hair. Clumps of hair fell as he did this.
“I mean this is fucking ballistic, dad. The neighbors are starting to worry, and so am I. This can’t go on, you need to get rid of that thing and go on with your life.” I said, not even realizing what I had said until it all came out.
He just stared at me blankly, almost as blank as mom’s face.
“Raegan,” he said, standing up, mom in tow. “That was a naughty thing to say. I’m afraid mom and I are going to have to punish you.”
He started towards me as I backed away.
“You have to sleep in mom’s bed tonight. She’ll keep an eye on you to keep you from getting into more trouble.” Dad grabbed me by my collar with such force that it hurt. He dragged mom and I upstairs and into their bedroom, where it seemed the flies had their base.
He threw me onto the bed, and shoved mom on after.
“Goodnight, Raegan. Goodnight, mommy.”
I stayed frozen in terror.
“Raegan,” dad said, his voice growing impatient. “Say goodnight to mommy.”
“G-goodnight, mommy.”
“Very good. Night night.” He said and locked the door.
I fought the urge to vomit as mom’s smell became overbearing. Flies swarmed around her, and a few tried to crawl into my ear.
I saw as mom’s mouth started to move, and for a second I feared that my father had brought upon the zombie apocalypse, but then I realized she might be talking to me.
“Mom? What is it? Please mom, please help me, dad is scaring me.” I begged, beginning to cry.
But she didn’t talk to me, I was stupid to think so. Instead, I watched in horror as maggots came out of her mouth and into my face, crawling around as one got in my mouth.
That was it for me. I jumped out of bed, gagging.
Crawling out of the bedroom window, I tried to escape.
But dad had already guessed my plan. He was waiting at the ground below me as I hoisted myself down from the second story.
“Running away, are you? Naughty, naughty, naughty.” He waved his finger at me, and I saw he was hiding something behind his back. I backed away.
“Mom and I tried to give you a good home. But I guess you were too ungrateful for that, were you? I can’t have my only other family member leave me. That would be such a shame.” He said, and it was at that moment I started fearing for my life. My suspicions turned out to be true. Dad unveiled what he had been hiding behind his back; the same glass shard he used to kill mom, still stained with her blood.
My instincts kicked in there. I began circles around the house, the only plan I had at that point was to tire him out.
But then I had an idea.
As I heard him rounding the corner, I opened and slammed the front door as hard as I could, then ran over to the backyard. He fell for it, as I heard him walk into the house not a minute later.
I scanned the backyard, searching for a weapon. Eventually I found something, an old baseball bat dad and I used to play with all the time.
I hid behind a tree, hoping he wouldn’t find me. I guess he had figured out I wasn’t in the house quite quickly, because I heard the backyard door swing open.
“Raegan…” He taunted. “Come out. I can’t lose you, too.”
I silently cried as he neared the tree.
I saw his fingers wrap around the bark.
“Peekaboo,” He whispered, giggling to himself.
I didn’t waste any time. I swung the bat directly at his head, and he immediately fell. He aimlessly swung his glass shard around, slicing my arm open. I didn’t stop. I beat him over the head multiple times, splattering myself with blood. It wasn’t until later I fell out of my rage. I remembered how he taught me how to hit a baseball with this very bat, and all the good times came flooding back to me. I touched his face. He twitched in pain.
“Oh, dad.” I cried. “I’m so sorry, daddy!” I pulled him into a hug, and I felt him quivering weakly.
“I’ll go get you cleaned up.” I said.
From that day on dad and I were a lot closer. I finally understood why he kept mom around this long. He was just a lonely guy who needed some love, and when the only person who loved him left, he couldn’t let go. Sometimes you just need to show a little empathy. Our relationship grew, which made me think that mom was what was holding us back all these years. I’d make him dinner, and he never complained; he complained about mom’s cooking all the time. Every night we’d watch a movie together. Dad would always pick the same movie to watch, and it became our favorite movie. Weekend at Bernie’s.
Nighttime was the best. I’d take him upstairs, and we’d read books together before I kissed him goodnight and fell asleep in his arms.
“Goodnight, daddy.” I said as the flies swarmed around both of us.
As I kissed him goodnight, a maggot crawled out of his mouth and onto my skin.
I wasn’t disgusted by it anymore. In fact, I liked it. It was like he was kissing me goodnight, too.
I tucked my dad into his bed, right next to mom. I hadn’t touched mom in weeks. She stayed in her bed, never to leave it. I liked it better that way.
“Night night. Sleep tight. Don’t let the bedbugs bite. Dad, say goodnight to me, too.” I waited for a while, but he didn’t respond.
“Dad?”
edit: hey guys, for whatever reason i can’t open messages at all, if you’re looking to narrate my story, just go ahead, anyone here has my permission as long as they credit me.