Jess was gorgeous in every sense of the word. Her hair burnt a bright orange, flowing perfectly down her back. Freckles formed wondrous constellations on her face, and her lips sat perfectly, framing a smile even Aphrodite would be jealous of. She had the deepest brown eyes that spoke to your soul, and could be forgiven for never saying a word as a thousand fell from her every glance. Jess was perfect, and god knows what great deeds I had done in my past life to deserve to say this, but, Jess was mine, and I was hers.
I proposed to her on the beach, where we had our first kiss. Not a single doubt came to me when I decided she was the one, we were made for each other, and she would be the first to admit it. Our wedding day is still the memory I cherish more than any other. The dress she wore was stunning, but only a fraction of how breathtaking her happy, love filled face had been. Breaking every known boundary of perfection, I felt unworthy of her presence.
Life after that was great. We moved into an apartment close to our work places. Spent the weekends either watching old 90s films or out getting a taste of everything Chicago had to offer. The first five years flew past us, a blur of joy and self-satisfaction. Having me question if even the heavens could replicate the life we both shared. Unfortunately, the universe is unbiased, unforgiving, and works in ways that no one can predict.
The diagnosis came on a rainy Sunday. I still remember the doctor pulling me to the side as if it was yesterday.
“It’s brain cancer.”, he said matter-of-factly.
“She won’t have much time left, unfortunately. Spend it all with her, I’m so sorry, Mr Gonzalez.”
I wept that day, I wept enough to fill the seas with my sobs. I wept till my eyes felt like they would fall out of my skull. I wept till no tears fell anymore, only the squeaking of sharp inhales escaping my throat. Walking out of the hospital bathroom, to see Jess sitting in the waiting room, took me the strength of gods to hold back any more sorrow.
“It’s okay, we still have some time, don’t we?” Her melodic voice gave my soul comfort, momentarily transporting me away from the suffocating grief.
“Don’t think you’ve gotten rid of me already, I still have a while to make your life hell.” she said with a giggle.
The next few weeks were unbearable. Jess lost weight rapidly. Her freckled cheeks now sinking deep into her face. I loved her, and seeing her slowly fall apart made me angry at the world. Sometimes I caught myself wishing I had cancer as well, so I wouldn’t have to stay without her, and we could both leave this unforgiving existence in each other’s arms.
One thing I did notice though, despite her physical health falling drastically, Jess seemed to have gotten a lot more intelligent. It’s like her mind was working at ten times the speed as everyone else’s. Whenever we would go shopping, she would have the exact amount of cash ready for all our groceries before we even reached the counter, down to the single penny. In fact, her intelligence surpassed what I knew was humanly possible. She could tell if it was going to rain days in advance just by feeling the air. Even calling out the weather forecasts on the radio for being wrong sometimes. When I questioned her on how she knew all of this, she would respond with,
“Oh, I just know it, I guess.”
Soon enough, Jess was moving things with her thoughts. Catching mugs that slipped off the kitchen counter, and flicking light switches from our bed. It was miraculous, I couldn’t believe it. Her once brown eyes now had streaks of budding green surrounding her pupil. Too struck by despair to even acknowledge the magnitude of her newly found gifts, I simply chose to brush them off.
Until one night, my sleep was unexpectedly broken. I raised from the bed, rubbing the weariness from my eyes to aid them in adjusting to the dark. Quickly noticing Jess’s absence from the bed, I scanned my surroundings, hoping to find her silhouette. That’s when an odd clicking sound cut through the room’s silence from above me. I jerked my head up, only to see Jess… She was on all fours upside down, unexplainably attached to the ceiling.
“Babe…”
My voice was timid, the peculiarity of the situation slowly seeping in and morphing into terror. Jess remained static for a while, making me second guess if I was seeing things. When all of a sudden her body dropped, landing right on top of me. I tensed up in fear, she felt deathly cold, her hair blanketed over my face, which made taking breaths extremely difficult.
Instinctively, I pushed her, and when that didn’t work, I resorted to a massive shove. Her thin frame flew off me, slamming into the wall.
“JESS, WHAT THE FUCK.”
I blurted, my voice shrill and panicked. She laid unmoving on the floor, her face covered by one of her emaciated arms. After a while, I managed to murmur a
“Hun…are you okay?”
Soft sobs broke from her crumpled body, her chest rising and falling with deep, ragged breaths.
“You hurt me.”
She whispered, almost inaudibly,
“YOU FUCKING HURT ME YOU PIG.”
Jess’s voice echoed within our apartment. I recoiled in shock.
“I… I’m… I’m so sorry.”
My voice broke, I didn’t know what was happening, but it terrified me nonetheless.
“Of course you are.”
She hissed at me.
“That’s all you ever are, fucking sorry.”
This…was not my Jess. She would never raise her voice at me, let alone speak such vile, hurtful words.
“You scared me…that’s all… I didn’t mean to hurt you, I’m sorry.”
I got out of bed, reaching out to help her up. Her hand quickly snapped at mine, leaving a visible red mark,
“DON’T TOUCH ME.”
Her voice rattling the room, it sounded too deep to be Jess’s. I stumbled backwards, falling back into bed with my hand clutching the stinging arm she smacked.
“This is why everyone leaves you. All you do is push people away. You’re insufferable.”
I did nothing but stare, the magnitude of her insults now suffocating my will to move.
“You know how grateful I am that I’m going to die soon? I can’t wait to not fucking listen to your annoying voice day in and day out.”
A tear made its way down my face, and eventually a whole stream followed. For Jess’s sake, I had tried to keep composed the last few weeks, however this was too much, even for me.
“Ever wonder why your dad came in your mom then pissed off? He didn’t want to deal with you. You were a detestable prick before you even came out of your whore mother.”
Jess’s body slowly raised from the floor, until it was eventually floating off the ground. She looked down at me, and I noticed how her eyes were now completely mossy green.
“I would be doing the world a favor if I killed you right here, no one would have to deal with you being a parasite ever again.”
She lurched at me, grabbing a hold onto my neck. I gasped for air but to no avail, scratching at her wrists for a chance to breath. This only made her tighten her grip, causing the blood to rush towards my face. My hand scrambled, finding the lamp on our bed side table and slamming it into Jess’s head. She screeched, letting go of my throat. Thinking fast, I took the chance to once again push her off, but this time she caught herself on the wall, levitating with one hand on it. While I gasped for air, I slowly watched as she melted into the surface. Her body liquifying and covering the area with a dark red spot. I felt like throwing up, uncertain as to what on earth was happening. The spot grew rapidly, until it covered the entire room with a fleshy, meat like substance. I ran outside the room, sprinting towards the front door, but as my fingers fell on the cold brass knob, a tentacle like appendage emerged from the bedroom and wrapped itself around my ankle, pulling me onto the floor. I kicked at it, managing to loosen its hold, and this time made a run for the safe in our spare bedroom, where I had kept a revolver. The walls were now rapidly being consumed by the flesh, until every surface was completely hidden. I backed into the closet door, and sat with the loaded gun in my hand. The wall in front of me started to pulsate, twisting and turning until it formed the familiar face of Jess.
“You really think you can run from me?”
I stared at her, trying to wrap my head around what was happening,
“What the fuck is going on??? Why are you doing this???”
Tears streamed down my face, dread grasping my soul. Jess only stared back at me, a wide grin plastered ear to ear.
“Because… I think you’re a stain.”
The face lunged at me, a long bloody neck following behind it. I dodged the attack, managing to point the gun at it, and pulling the trigger. A loud bang resonated, causing my ears to ring in agony. When I opened my eyes, Jess laid on the floor, blood pouring from her temple. I quickly dove forwards, scooping up her body into my arms.
“What…what have I done…no, no, NO, NO.”
I pushed her face into my chest and sobbed violently.
“Hey…”
A soft voice whispered.
“JESS… I… wait hold on… I’m calling an ambulance.”
I reached for my phone, but she quickly stopped me,
“No…hush…there’s not enough time.”
She sounded weak, every syllable fought to make it out of her mouth.
“Listen…whatever happened, that wasn’t me…okay. I don’t know what’s happening to me…”
I brushed the hair off her face, caressing her cheek,
“I know… I know it wasn’t…you would never hurt me…”
I could see the corners of her mouth lift, forming a weak smile, somehow managing to comfort me.
“I love you so much…so, so, so much.”
“I love you too…”
I replied between sobs.
“Promise me…promise me you’ll let yourself live Tony… Just because I can’t…doesn’t mean you shouldn’t…”
I stared at her for a moment, wondering how even in death I was her first thought…
“Of course Jess… Of course… I promise… anything for you…”
“Good…”
I watched her take a final breath, before her head fell limply to the side.
Jess passed away in my arms, the cause of death being given as cancer. The wound from where I had shot her had filled up, but I know for a fact it hit her. My fully loaded revolver was missing a bullet. I never brought up what happened, to everyone else she had died peacefully in her sleep, but I know the truth, and it eats me.
I still live in the same apartment, though it is a lot less of a home without Jess. Keeping up with my promise, I go out with friends as much as I can. Recently joining a film club where I share our passion of old cinema with many other people. Though, losing Jess is a void that I have had to accept as unrepairable. I still feel her sometimes, shuffling next to me when I sleep. Knowing that she’s still around, looking after me, may be just enough to keep me going.