Sometimes I look at life and I thank God, for the food I found. Managed to find a semi rotten apple, it wasn’t bad except the fact it was a bit rotten. It’s fine though it’s been awhile since I had a fruit. Eating just these nasty ratatas all day makes my stomach turn. Worst is the houndooms can sniff shit especially shit that has pokémon inside it. Don’t remember the last time I had fruit.
Ah the good old days. I remember the days when me and my brothers would roam with our Growlithe around the park. We used to play fetch and he particularly was fond of this caterpie, It was my cherished memory ..until that fucker went nuts and burnt the entire garden into ash. Thought he was done when he turned his attention to us, my brother threw his pokeball but it just hit him on his head, the stupid dog didn’t like that and smashed it along with my brother’s arm. We ran and managed to get away until a pigeot scooped him away. Last I saw of him. He was a dick but no one deserves to get eaten.
I am not sure how it started, some said it was a failed experiment , some way it’s mind control , but I think these creatures realised something very important. They are more in numbers, they are have powers and they choose their friends and I think they don’t want to be our friends anymore.. Hey sounds a lot like homelander.
Anyways the news covered it for months, the army managed capture mew and his friend or lover not sure mewtwo but those things seemed like the only sane Pokémon. Apparently they offered to help us stop the Pokémon but one thing led to another and one was shot dead on live television…thats when shit got bad.
His death awakened some ancient bird Lugia and he got , not one , not two , but three fucking giant birds..one of them could shoot lighting. Not sure if the bird knew what he was doing but he just fried very circuit connection in the city. And there went communication. Radio silence.
After that the ground invasion started..this is where humans realised yeah it’s done now. The stupid bird managed to weaken every pokeball in the city. We had Gengars, Dragonair’s , dittos and all sorts of these fuckers running around. We tried our best to fight but can’t do much a giant rock with 2 hands and scores of 4 armed roid monkeys tearing people apart. They knew how to cripple us..roads , telecommunications, hospitals.
. This wasnt just a random attack. It was a destabilising the human society and breaking us. We nuked each other in panic but that pretty much desolated everything and worst is some pokémon survived it.
Anyways I managed to bear trap the fucker that torched my brother. You have evolved but I remember you.
Can’t do much against koffing smog can you? The fuckers still spew toxin gas after they die. Burn that shit. You ll probably get carbon monoxide poisoning if your lucky.
I lured him by showing some human arm and he ran to eat it. Talk about biting the hand that feeds you. I washed your poop covered fur.
Anyways a quick bullet to the head would have been merciful so I left in the “koffing room* so he can die slowly. The smog neutralises their abilities so after a bit I made a nice blanket out of him. Not sure how long the koffing room will work but so far I managed to get 7 of them.
I made a shit list and all of them on it. Especially those big birds. Don’t think I can reach the fire one because he sleeps in the sun…why would you sleep there.
I wish we had normal Pokémon that didn’t have powers, like a pidgy that doesn’t create a tornado, or a butterfly that isn’t the size a motor bike.
Or nurse that isn’t a chansey. Fucking chanseys. They say I am carrying an egg but then they throw it at you and your face melts off.
Anyways boys and girls I need to charge my phone , I managed to strap a Pikachu to my transformer and get some light running.
Do you feel bad for them?
Don’t.
I am gonna off him when my phone’s done.
These aren’t the Pokémon you know..it’s some weird hellish creatures that need to be wiped. And if I don’t get back please carry on my mission. Remember the basic things in school fire beats leaf, head shot works for most and armour piercing rounds for the rock ones.
Good night