I found this original post, with its many edits and post scripts on some subreddit where teens complain about their families. I copied and pasted the majority of what the OP wrote into one post, presented here, which capture the key points but doesn’t quite do justice to the experience of watching the conversation blow up in real time, with every commenter gradually getting more shocked as the truth slowly emerged.
R
-——————————-
OP Wrote:
My dad grounded me and I can’t believe it. I feel like at almost sixteen years old I am too old to be treated like a little girl, locked in my room, car keys locked up as soon as I’m back from school. No cell phone use except in the living room, because there my parents can see what I’m doing, and even THEN the rule is no cell phone AT ALL after 8pm, even though TikTok has barely started really to get going at 8pm.
I didn’t even do anything for him to be pissed at me for. He just said I have a bad attitude and no respect or gratitude for my family and their sacrifices yadda yadda. Since it’s nearly my birthday, my uncles are in town for my Mudança and apparently I was “too many disrespectfuls” (I HATE when he tries to talk English) and had a “surly look” on my face when we got them from the airport. I wonder why, duh. Excuse the fuck out of me for not putting on on a big fake grin for these guys - they seem WAY too excited about being in my ceremony tbh. Just dumb stuff like that.
Some things I get in trouble for are not even my fault, you know, like Jen got me this nice pair of jeans from her mom’s vintage store, and my dad went mad, like “Why are you bringing home pants this close to Mudança??”. I know I’ll be in those long skirts 24/7 once I’m sixteen, so there’s no point even having jeans really, but he was acting like I was threatening to come downstairs for my prueba wearing acid wash jeans and a halter top instead of the robes.
SO what do you think? Am I being a brat like he says or is he just the WOOORST?
EDIT:
I’m actually really surprised to hear that not everybody has a Mudança. Some people seem confused about it as though it’s something weird. It’s not, and that really wasn’t the point of my post. It’s just a tradition: “a gathering to mark the change from girl to woman” bla bla. No big deal, and there’s no crazy ritual or anything. I haven’t done it yet, but from what I’ve seen of my old sisters when it’s been their turn, its just the same kind of pruebas you practise with your father already, like, estiramiento intimo, mamada, regalos mojados, ocultar la serpiente, but with Mudança, all the men in the family take part in the pruebas - that’s why my uncles are in town for the ceremony. So that’s it - nothing weird. If you’re a teen girl reading this I’m sure you do the same kind of things with your family, whether you call it a Mudança or something else.
EDIT 2:
OK so it seems like maybe every teen girl doesn’t feel the same way I do… I’ve just seen about seven million DMs, all yelling at me that I’m being abused. Truly guys, chill. I promise, I am not being hit or beaten or chained or anything like that. People are asking for me to be clear about what I do with my dad, and asking if I do “sex” and “sexual” things. I don’t know what that means because we are opted out of all sex education for religious reasons. So at home we don’t talk about “sex” at all theoretically. We just learn by practical guidance from my dad. The pruebas are a way that fathers prepare their daughters for womanhood, from early childhood, and honestly, although he’s mean a lot of the time, I am grateful to my dad for taking me on that journey, because without that, I would never know what to do with a husband or anything. And I’m sorry I brought up the Mudança it’s honestly just like a big birthday party. Or as my dad says “We’re going to have too many funs.” Eyeroll.
EDIT 3:
Won’t lie, I’m starting to get a bit freaked out. People keep DMing me saying that it is still abuse to do the pruebas with children, even if you don’t physically restrain them or hit them, which is just… wow ok. I really thought I was talking about things that every family does, and suddenly I’m wondering if my dad and uncles are abusers.
EDIT 4:
To those people that have told me to talk to my older sisters about it for support, I guess I have to explain also that a lot of the time Mudança is used as a place for families to show off their freshly of-age daughters to prospective husbands. The morning after each of my older sisters’ Mudanças I woke to the news that they had “found a husband in the night” and moved away to start their new lives. Obviously now I’m questioning everything, but especially that detail. I haven’t seen either sister since their respective ceremonies.
EDIT 5:
A few people have offered to report my dad to the cops, which I appreciate, but I’m asking anyone who is tempted to do that to at least wait until tomorrow. As bad an idea as everyone in my DMs is telling me it is, I want to talk to him face to face, one on one, tonight, to see what he says. Wish me luck.
EDIT 6:
Praise the Lord. My father explained everything to me kindly and I realise now that I was wrong to listen to all the ignorant fools on the internet who don’t understand the holy power of Mudança.
At the ceremony I felt truly close to the maker. Tonight I experienced the sky-father who made ALL, in the body of the meat-father who made ME: his every sigh and moan a sacramental rite. And when my father loosed his seed I imagined it as a white dove released into an endless night, lighting and patterning my dark womb like how god once spoke a word into the centre of the void and it became the world.
My husband, so recently a stranger to me, now my beloved, saw me at the ceremony and immediately proposed. We leave tonight, to begin a new life on a farm WITHOUT INTERNET. It is sad to say goodbye, but do not try to find or follow me.
Please remember me as I am now: We are in too many loves. I am too many happy.