Part 2
https://www.reddit.com/r/nosleep/comments/19awxth/revelation_part_2/
Part 4
https://www.reddit.com/r/nosleep/comments/19cmv99/revelation_part_4_final/
Me and my girlfriend, Clara, sat watching TV, bored, in my bachelor apartment.
Clara spoke sweetly “Why don’t you play a video game? I like watching you play them. How about that one you showed me with the squirrel? The one you said is valuable collectible?”
I responded quickly “You mean Conker’s bad fur day? Sure, that’s one of my favourite games!”
I put the game in and started showing her some of my favourite parts when I heard Nibiru’s voice in my head.
‘Sean, I know I gave you that game, and that you know it’s my favourite game, but you need to play it in an emulator from this point forward. Those N64 controllers are ticking time bombs and you’re going to lose a thumb if you keep playing that.’ Nibiru said sternly.
I took his warning seriously and tried to sell Clara on watching me play it from the start in an emulator, but she got bored.
“Why don’t we go for a walk, we can get some steps and play some 3DS games.” She said sweetly.
We went for a walk shortly after. When we got to 1000 steps on the 3DS we began the tedious process of changing the date to reset the pedometer. Then I heard Nibiru once again.
‘Sean you need to stop this. The 3DS is newer and more dangerous than the N64. The way you have to change the date over and over is even part of the curse. If you let it get you it will take both of your legs. And if you shake it to get steps instead it can take one, or both of your arms.’ Nibiru said sternly.
I convinced Clara to head back instead of continuing and she was out of 3DS coins very shortly. She was starting to get cross with me and I could tell.
She spoke with barely hidden malice in her voice. “How about we watch Shrek?”
We watched the first Shrek movie after that and I really enjoyed it. Then she popped in Shrek Forever After.
‘Sean. Sean! Watching these movies backwards is not acceptable and that’s what she’s going to try and get you to do!’ Nibiru roared.
I spoke up “Let’s watch Shrek 2 instead. Why go from 1 to 4?”
Clara looked at me with anger in her eyes “You don’t want to do anything I want to do and the only excuse you have is a dragon talking to you in your head. I have one talking to me too and she says to leave you if you won’t watch these Shrek movies in the right order to understand their whole message.”
I sat there looking at her and heard Nibiru in my head.
‘She is willingly trying to Sacrifice you! Let’s go half way and end this right here! Watch Shrek 4.’ Nibiru cackled.
We then proceeded to watch it and I was so zonked out by the end I didn’t remember what happened in the movie.
The next night we were spending time together and she wanted to watch Shrek 3. Nibiru didn’t say anything to me so I assumed it was fine to go this far. She left after we watched it with an evil look on her face. As she walked away from the door it suddenly changed.
The doorway now led to a weird fuschia red room with swirling smoke everywhere. Shrek stood at the front of the doorway. He looked at me and made gestures in an act of intimidation.
He disappeared shortly after and I looked through the doorway. Clara was nowhere to be seen.
A couple days later she showed up with Shrek 2. We had sex but it was bad. I felt like I shouldn’t be doing this anymore now that my soul was where it should be.
We watched Shrek 2 after we were done and she left immediately afterwards.
The very next day she showed up wearing 3D glasses with Shrek 3D.
I let her in and then heard Nibiru’s voice.
‘Sean you watch that and you’re getting wand knifed up all 7 chakras. I shouldn’t have to tell you this, we had her unpardonably sinned after you watched Shrek 3. Do not watch that under any circumstance or I will delete you midway through. Because I care Sean.’ Nibiru said softly.
I spoke up with more anger than I thought. “I’m not watching that! I’m tired of Shrek! We can do something else!”
Clara exploded like a volcano. “You are never going to get it unless you watch this! It doesn’t matter if you’ve seen it before, you need to see it with fresh eyes!” She screamed.
I held my ground. “No. I’m done with Shrek. No more!”
She spat as she shrieked. “Then I’m done with you!”
She stormed out and I didn’t go after her.
As soon as she left my field of view the fuschia red room appeared again.
This time there was a 10 foot tall version of Farquaad standing there. He gave me a thumbs up, then did a monkey kick, disappearing through the doorway.
The next day I left my apartment and went to the grocery store. While I was shopping I noticed a 10 foot tall Farquaad watching me from over the shelf.
He pushed on it and it fell over. I ducked as it hit the next and they all fell over like dominoes. As I crouched under the shelves I saw the feet of numerous Farquads gathering.
I thought all hope was lost when Sargon of Akkad appeared to me.
“Go with god!” He said, and held out a lightsaber to me.
I helped out my arm and it materialised as I grabbed it.
I turned it on and started chopping the legs of the Farquaads. After I had eviscerated all the Farquads I could see I crawled out from under the shelf and looked around. There didn’t seem to be anyone in the store and I left promptly.
Once I was in the parking lot headed for my car I saw numerous 10 foot tall Farquaad’s, prowling around.
One of them saw me and made a noise like a dragon gargling snot. They all looked at me and charged from different directions.
I swung the sabre horizontally and chopped their legs off as they neared me. I made it back to my car and started driving home.
Out of nowhere a transport truck t boned my car and I spun out in a daze. I looked over to see a Farquaad at the wheel.
Another tore off my door. Then another still grabbed me and I dropped my lightsaber.
The Farquads carried me towards a fuschia red door that stood in the middle of a field.
I screamed and struggled but it was no use. They were incalculably strong.
As I neared the door I heard Nibiru’s voice.
‘I know that lightsaber isn’t in your hand right now, but in exchange for me confiscating it I will teleport you out of this pocket dimension, and back to your apartment.’ Nibiru cackled.
I was then teleported back to my room. Where I was left unarmed, wondering if more Farquads would show up. I’m still wondering if I’m safe as I’m writing this.