I am not responsible for how what you read below may affect you.
I can’t take it anymore.
It’s been almost a year since I started living alone. I have never been a girl who is especially afraid of the dark or who believes in ghosts.
I have discovered that there is something else and it may have replaced my loved ones.
Almost two years ago, after a big storm, a written piece of paper appeared in my room.
“What if the Bible had been written by the devil? Be evil, it will be what will save us.”
That made me believe that destiny is a sentence, and the possibility of options is a small freedom. ALWAYS think about doing evil when considering your own options.
Some time later my cat scratched me on my left hand. A thunderbolt and a trident seemed to be perfectly drawn on the wound. At that time I preferred to think that it came from Neptune…
In my natal chart there is what is called a «grand trine». I believe it is an exceptional drawing that only few people in the world have. Mine is made up of the moon, Jupiter and Neptune. This convinces me that I am a very lucky person astrally.
It all started a few weeks ago, when my boyfriend informed me that he had had nocturnal sleep paralysis. I didn’t give it much thought until the next day it happened to me.
I was in bed sleeping at midnight when I woke up looking at the door, for some reason I was desperate to close it, I was trying to get up again and again, using strength with my abs. I couldn’t move.
'’Game over. Game over. Game over’’
I saw something at the door. A figure of a woman who was not from this world. She had long black hair, was wearing a white dress, and was holding something in her other hand.
I turned quickly.
“This is the most harmless way I have found to show myself”
*1 Re-read what I wrote above, please.
I started to be afraid, very afraid.
The next day passed normally, I decided to tell my boyfriend what had happened, ignoring what I had heard coming from that woman, it was too much even for me and the last thing I wanted was for him to think that I was crazy. In a few weeks we will start living together and I don’t want to ruin it.
That thing let me sleep for almost a month until it came back. I was in bed, with my right hand resting on my left shoulder when my brain began to want to move my fingers in a “playful” way while my brain repeated the image of the woman being over and over again. It was then when I realized that she wanted to convey it to me
*2 Please reread the above.
“I want us to get along”
I was paralyzed with fear. I wrote a message to my boyfriend but I fell asleep before he could reply.
“Maybe it’s just that I feel alone and my mind escapes like this,”
I told my boyfriend the next day. In time this would be resolved, I imagine.
In the afternoon I was sitting on the couch debating whether to go buy something sweet or not, I had been trying to lose weight and didn’t want to gain weight, I explained to a stuffed kitten that I have on the couch.
I didn’t expect him to answer me.
“Do you know what the entity is?”
“Ehm… not exactly… it sounds like some kind of company”
“The entity wants you to be part of it”
I stopped trying to play with the stuffed animal. Something made me feel in danger, as if a demon was waiting for me to make a pact with it by hiding in the shadows.
“I don’t want to sign anything” I felt my soul in danger.
“Look, I’m not a lawyer, nor is this a contract, you just want sweets because after quitting cannabis, your body needs THC and your brain doesn’t know how to ask for it, that’s why you can’t get the need to eat candy out of your head. “
I was surprised at how accurate my thinking was and the way it had arrived.
Now the spirit wanted to be my friend, great. It made me feel like I was so special that even forces from beyond came looking for me. I’m twenty-two, I look like a miss and I live in front of a beautiful church, my balconies have views of it and although I don’t like to brag, since I’ve lived here something makes me feel like the princess of the place.
*Go back to point 1.
‘When you observe something for a certain amount of time, you are able to see the weaknesses.’’
“That is the true power, observing.”
Now the spirit wanted to be my friend, great. It made me feel like I was so special that even forces from beyond came looking for me. I’m twenty-two, I look like a miss and I live in front of a beautiful church, my balconies have views of it and although I don’t like to brag, since I’ve lived here something makes me feel like the princess of the place.
In the morning I tried to turn on my phone, but all my attempts were in vain. It took me a while to remember that I had read a sign on the entrance to my building announcing power outages on a day that happened to be today.
I was reading the book that I had received with a magazine that I like to buy every month while I took time to discover what was happening with my phone, it is called Boss man.
“We made a bet. I crushed it in the pool. That’s my prize.
A can of Dr Peppers?
It’s good, don’t tell me no or I won’t take you to the next family barbecue.”
It wasn’t until five in the afternoon when I decided to contact my family using the cashier’s phone number at a small store near my house. I needed to tell them that everything was fine and that my phone had broken.
'’You have the little iPhone that I gave you, look for it.’’ My mother informed me.
When I arrived I looked for it everywhere, I found it in one of the kitchen drawers and I put it on charge. But it didn’t work. Then I realized that what was not working was the charger base, but the phone could be intact.
I bought a new one and charged both phones.
The last time I turned on the iPhone 4 was last year, when I broke my iPhone 6 and my 2017 MacBook at the same time in a peculiar crisis. I took a photo of myself when I felt better and sent it to a guy on iMessage. I was excited to see it again.
When I saw her I was scared.
I was wearing the same underwear. A guess sports bra and a fluorescent pink thong.
I felt overwhelmed by everything that was happening. Once again it was discovered that everything in my life was programmed. Every breath, every step, every decision… I began to try to consider options of all the things I could do in a case like this, stay still, do some craft, go for a walk… I settled on the last one.
Deep down, if everything was programmed, the best thing would be to see what destiny had prepared for me on the street, the rest of the programmed and obsolete people, who were not even aware of it.
I concentrated on seeing all the signs in others as I walked.
In the past I used to sit and smoke cannabis on a bench in one of the quietest and most beautiful streets in my city, the main street. Sometimes I would go with nothing and wait for someone else to offer me. I liked to tempt fate with passersby. I was thinking about the future and what my new life would be like living with my boyfriend. Maybe I would miss doing this, but I knew I wasn’t missing anything. Despite meeting very interesting people, they were the kind of people you’d rather never see again.
I remembered the importance of love in life.
Talk, kiss and walk. That was everything to have a happy relationship according to an ancient hieroglyph that I had seen. Living with my boyfriend would just be having a new schedule, for two, that would surely take me away from the mysticism of my existence to lead a more normal routine.
I hope the entity moves away from me. I will receive gifts, three a year hopefully. Valentine’s Day, my birthday and Christmas.
Although I’m scared of wasting time in my new relationship. I am convinced that in the prison of life, the only way to escape is by traveling in time.
I wish you could send me a sign from the future.
I bought a can of Dr. Peppers when I saw it in the refrigerator of the small store I decided to visit. I had never tried it before. I smoked a cigarette while watching all kinds of people walk by.
On this occasion, a couple walking a dog suffered a break in the leash holding it right in front of me and I was surprised. It should mean something, although I’m not sure what. The drink tasted like a lollipop and I had a hard time finishing it.
The next day I woke up to a message from my mother.
My grandmother was in the hospital with a fever and couldn’t walk. I was very afraid that she would die.
I was trying to distract myself from my own drama by continuing with Boss Man.
I closed the door to my room while I thought that I would sleep with the light on that night.
'’Now I control you’’
I didn’t want the spirit to have so much power over me.
I was in bed trying to sleep when through a kind of telepathy I discovered my boyfriend’s secrets. I prefer to ignore it in case one day by chance he can find this account.
Now my friendship with the “entity” informed me about my situation and made that night so bitter that I decided to end the diet and go out to buy Oreos.
I ate them in silence, in the dark on the bed, behind me, the illuminated church could be seen through the window.
Meanwhile, I thought about how it would affect our relationship if I knew his secret. Now my whole view of him had changed.
The cookies didn’t taste good to me because I felt very overwhelmed with my situation. I had forgotten to mention that my boyfriend is my sweetheart from highschool. I have known him for too many years, and I do not doubt the veracity of what I heard. Now I doubt if I should live with him. Maybe I had received the information that I needed. The entity even told me the date when he would leave me, 2029.”Next time you want to eat some of this, you’ll remember how I made you feel.”I vomited as much as possible so I don’t gain more weight.
I remembered a man I met while sitting in the street. He asked me for money and even though I didn’t give it to him, we started to get along well. Now I could be that kind of person that you prefer not to see anymore, I would risk telling him how exceptional my situation was to know what his response would be.
I called him and we met in a park a few minutes later.
We continue walking.
“Have you ever felt like you could have telepathy with another person?”
We arrived at a street where there was no light, we headed to a viewpoint. It was hard for me to see the ground, everything was so dark.
He told me about a very traumatic experience from his past and in some way, it made me remember the secret that the entity had communicated to me about my boyfriend.
We smoke, we talk more.
“Forget it forget it”
“God is big”
He told me how he suffered from some type of pain in his jaw and head. It was as if this and my obsession with mewing were related. I got scared again.
We looked at the stars a little longer before leaving. As we walked back I thought about the novel I was reading and how one of the characters had been murdered by a homeless man. I couldn’t help but feel in danger. It’s not good to trust strangers, especially not in the way I had met him. It wasn’t too long until I got home.
When I arrived I leaned against the back of the sofa while I thought about what to do. I was afraid of the darkness of the night and the spirit that stalked me.
I’m good under pressure. I thought about the absurdity of the situation and headed towards the kitchen to eat a piece of bread. That would end my fear. I grabbed it with my left hand even though I’m right-handed.
I lay in bed. I wanted to go back to the kitchen to get more.
“If I could, I would bring it to you, but I am many kilometers away”
“Where are you?”
“Go to hell. Will you come?”
Again the image of the spirit.
“Next time I’ll groom myself more.”
I thought about my boyfriend. There are eleven days left to see him.
*Please return to point 2.
I feel challenged to write this story. Fidgeting with my fingers, that’s why I did it
.
I prefer to publish it today, Saturday, because although I think it would be better to do it tomorrow, I don’t want to spoil a sacred day. I hope that publishing it will end my torment.
Please feel free to comment anything.
PS: My grandmother feels better today.