I haven’t slept in days and I don’t know what else to do so I’m writing my story on Reddit. My name is James Carter. You see, I’m a big fan of the show Family Guy. I’ve seen every episode multiple times so when I saw a odd looking family guy vhs at a yard sale I was intrigued. It wasn’t an episode that I recognized and I’ve been to tons of yardsales prowling for family guy vhs and dvds and such. I figured it must’ve been some kinda lost episode. I’d heard of those so I went to the man in charge of the yard sale and asked about the vhs. “You don’t want to buy that” he told me “it’s not a good episode”. I like most episodes of family guy so I persisted with the transaction. I asked how much it cost and he told me “you don’t pay for this episode with money”. That was kinda mysterious but I took the tape and went on my way. In hindsight that was a blunder…
When I got back home I popped the episode in to my vhs player that I have for watching vhs tapes. It seemed like a regular episode at first. The theme song was as catchy as ever and I enjoyed listening to it but I thought that Lois maybe winked a little while saying “violence in movies” but I dismissed it. It’s crazy what your eyes can miss when you don’t want to see. The episode started off regular. Peter tried almond milk for the first time then became vegan. I don’t remember the plot of the episode that well because of what happened during the first cutaway gag. Peter walked into the kitchen of his home and caught his family eating meat. Then he said “I ought to kill you guys for eating meat. Like that time I killed James Carter” then he looked into the camera with realistic looking eyes. Then the cutaway started and I couldn’t believe my eyes. Peter was beating up me but it wasn’t me. It was a family guy character that looked like me though and he had the same name. It freaked me out a little so I unplugged the TV. The episode was still playing though. Peter was still beating me up on the screen and eventually I was killed and Peter was laughing. Then the screen went dark.
At first I couldn’t move. How could family guy know my name and image? This had to be some kind of prank. But then, I heard a slightly off key version of Surfin Bird playing from the other room but when I went to investigate I couldn’t find the source of the music. The song eventually stopped and things have been normal. Well almost normal… every time I close my eyes I can hear Peter’s laughing hehehehehehehe. I’ll try to keep you guys updated if anything else unusual happens but I’m freaked out rn. I’m not sure but I think the laughing gets louder every time I close my eyes