I’ve been given one, probably last, chance to explain my reasoning. I did not do it. I am not insane. To whom it may concern…I saw it.
It was a beautiful day on that Sunday afternoon on the august 21st. I tied my shoelaces, filled thermos with ice cold water and put it in backpack. After I locked the door, I sent the same text message as every time: I’m on my way. Six houses uphill and I reached John’s house and waited.
John and I done this since we were kids, so often it became some sort of a ritual. Every Sunday afternoon we would go to one of our long walks. Always before the dark, always after the zenith. Our route was set up years ago: straight uphill, until we reach the pinnacle. After stopping for a quick cigarette and beautiful sunset we would continue the usual way: straight, right turn, straight, left turn uphill, straight downhill, left uphill, right downhill, straight, another right downhill, straight steep uphill, continue on right straight path.
At this point we couldn’t even remember who showed us this way, although John vaguely remembers his grandfather taking him on the walk called “the circle”. As you already imagined this route was one of our favorite since it formed perfect circle where, after some 7.5 miles, we would end up at the starting point.
That Sunday walk was the same as every other: I waited for John even though I sent him a heads-up text, he came out of his house complaining of whatever he had to complain that day and we went. At 86°F he quickly changed the subject and started ranting about this damn heat which was unusual for that time of the day.
I always found it funny how some things never change. For the last 26 years, ever since I’ve known John, he was and weirdly calm at the same time. He was embodiment of a person who would stay calm if someone in the neighborhood died, but would rant for one hour if someone ignored him for saying good afternoon. And honestly, I get that- we do have some shitty neighbors.
We continued walking uphill and as the sweat kept soaking my back all I could think was: I can’t wait to stop and take that delicious drag, that fist nicotine punch straight to my head and warm-filled lungs. After some thirty minutes, we were finally there. On the top of the world…or it seemed like that. John was drenched in sweat but that didn’t stop him from tumbling through his pockets trying to find his pack.
I stopped and with me the entire world stopped as well. Turning my head right I saw the Sun, slowly yet so magically, starting to disappear. In its glorious size it was so beautiful and but so frightening. The myriad of colors surrounded it, taking up a great portion of the sky and turning it into fiery orange cloak. Without taking my eyes of it, I lit my cigarette and enjoyed in every second of magnificent view.
“Okay, let’s go, I don’t want to be here alone at dark”, John startled me.
“Hold on, I want to see full sunset, maybe even to take some pics”, I replied taking the phone out of my pocket.
“Oh God, you and your fricking Sun, you are ALWAYS taking pictures and it always look the same anyways. And it will be dark soon”.
I knew he is still, at his ancient age, scared of dark but I could not miss this fantastic shot. Hell, maybe I become famous one day for my sunset collection. “Shh, it won’t be dark for at least an hour from now, relax”, I said almost like I was on auto pilot.
As I held my phone, attempting to find perfect angle to capture all the colors, I suddenly got the strange feeling of something being out of order. Sun seemed weird, but I couldn’t put my finger on it. Did it look bigger? Smaller? Oddly shaped? I should really stop drinking coffee. Sun looked like…a Sun. Big ,orange red, comforting. Then something unexpected happened. Like a shadow in the corner of your sight late at night- chills went through my spine, and I could feel every single hair on my body standing out. It’s just your anxiety acting up again, ignore it. Desperately I tried to shake that dread off and take a damn picture. Huh, not saving. I snapped few more shots and none of my photos were being saved in gallery.
“Weird”, I said, “my phone is acting up again.”
“Hah, told you to buy an iPhone. Okay, let’s go, I don’t want someone appearing here out of nowhere as always. What are people doing here anyway, no one lives here and this is not even the proper road, just dirt and rocks?”, stated John.
I looked at him and he seemed…weird. For a tiny split of a second he made a strange look, like he was suddenly very aware of his environment. It almost felt like he is a moving target and doesn’t want to stay in this place any longer. In normal situation I would simply overlook that as he is not the bravest man on Earth. Hell, once he started running when the sound of himself stepping on crunchy leaf scared him.
But this time I felt it too. With anxiety lump stuck in my throat I somehow muttered we should continue, and we went off. Straight forward and turn right. To break the eerie silence, we started talking about random everyday things: work, awful bosses, loud neighbors, costs of living. Talking outloud felt good, felt real. We finally reached right turn where the civilization officially starts. Big yards with small, old houses (and equally old people) snapped us out of freight. At least we were not alone anymore and in the middle of nowhere. Or better said on the top of nowhere.
Yet still, nothing felt normal. People were passing by like they are somnolent. One lady bumped my shoulder, and as I turned to apologize, I almost froze: I felt the same thing as when I looked at John. Except, this woman was not scared-she was just not there. Her eyes looked empty and almost looked unhuman, more like…cow’s eyes. She stared at me like I was the weird one, the one that doesn’ belong. What felt like a lifetime was probably just a second and the woman suddenly reset. Just like that, as if someone pushed the right button, she became concious human again.
“Oh, sorry, ha-ha, accident”, she said with normal look and polite smile.
“N..no problem” I managed to mutter. She went on her way, normal as ever. What the fuck was this??
Rest of the way was uneventful, and I tried acting normal, like the cow-eyed-woman never existed. I was probably tired, over caffeined and glued to my screen too much for my own mental state. After John and I parted ways, I hopped into shower in hopes of shocking myself into reality but for whatever reason my brain could not just let go. I kept rethinking and rewinding every single detail of the day: walk up to hill, forest right next to it, cliff on the other side on the route where the Sun sets, strange somnolent people with empty eyes. But nothing made sense and my mind wouldn’t stop itching.
Finally, I gave up and forced myself to go to bed. What is wrong with my phone? Did I miss the perfect photo? Why was John so freaked out and more importantly why hasn’t he said anything? An hour, or maybe two passed, and me and my restless legs were still awake when I got the sudden adrenalin rush- I got it! Like the name of the actress you just can’t remember, or when you remember how you know someone who said hi to you the other day. Only this was not followed by a moment of relief but pure confusion.
The Sun blinked. For probably less than a second, barely noticeable by your conscious sense, the. Sun. fucking .blinked.
I was startled by an unexpected sound of text message and my stomach dropper upon reading it: John: You’ve also seen it, haven’t you?