Log notes
Day 1
'’Do you want to try the next generation’s human-like house robot?’’
'’What’s a house robot?’’ Was my first thought. But the title made me curious and I clicked.
A company called HouseRobotics created a robot that would help you do basic household tasks in your home. Vacuuming, cleaning, dishes, take out the trash…you name it. I filled in my details and then completely forgot it until a month later when my phone rang. I picked up and it was an auotmated message.
Congratulations! You have been selected to try out the next generation’s house robot! Your delivery is expected to be with you within 5 days. Instructions can be found in the package. We hope you will be satisfied. Have a nice day.
I thought it was weird that I didn’t get to talk to a real person but maybe this is how the company communicate with its customers.
Four days later I came home from work. When I opened the front door and stepped into the hall, I saw a large cardboard package standing in the middle of the living room. I walked up to it and noticed that it said ‘‘HouseRobotics’’ on it. I wondered how deliverer got into my house but I was too curious about the package so I looked past it. I opened the package and there it was. The house robot.
It looked human. Two arms, two legs, head, body as so on. The eyes looked like two camera lenses, the nose had no nostrils and as the mouth, it had 6 small holes. The robot was covered in metallic gray color. I noticed the note that hung around its neck that said:
'’Congratulations to your new house robot Andy Roid!’’
'’Andy Roid?’’ I thought. Android…hm. Ingenious. The note continued.
'’Please follow the instructions below.
1.
To turn on the house robot. Say the name ANDY.
To turn off the house robot. Say the name ANDY and wait for response. Then say SHUT DOWN.
2.
Always make sure ANDY is fully charged. When ANDY is not in use - Turn off ANDY and the robot will automatically return to the supplied charging station.
3.
ANDY is pre-installed to handle most basic household tasks. To get ANDY do the dishes. Say ANDY and wait for a response. Then say WASH DISHES. Try more commands such as VACCUME, MAKE BED, TAKE OUT THE TRASH. And so on.
4.
When ANDY is thinking, his eyes light up in an orange light to indicate that ANDY is searching for information. This can take anywhere from 1-15 seconds depending on how advanced the task ANDY has been given.
5.
For questions - Call our customer service. The number can be found at the bottom of this note or in the back of ANDY’s head.
NOTE: Do not ask ANDY questions that have nothing to do with household chores. Do not answer any of ANDY’s questions.’‘
I thought the last note was a weird. Questions? Why would the robot…or Andy ask me any questions? I also received a login to HouseRobotic’s website where I would keep a logbook of my first 30 days with Andy.
'’After 30 days, we will come and get the robot back. Your experience is important to us and your review can help a lot with any future improvements and updates with the robot.’’
Sooo that’s why Im writing this. I tried to start the robot.
'’Andy.’’ I said loudly.
The eyes lit up. First in an orange glow and then the glow turned to a blue light. A faint humming sound was heard. When I looked at the back of the robot, I saw it had two vertical holes in the head from which hot hair was blown out of. Probably the fan system to keep Andy cool inside.
The robot just stood there. The eyes shone blue but nothing happened.
'’Hello?’’ I said a little nervously. No answer. I looked through the instructions again. I thought I would repeat its name again.
'’Andy.’’
A small blip soound was heard followed by a voice.
'’Hi, I am Andy, your personal house robot.’’
It sounded just like a robot. Not that I expected something different but just for the notes.
'’…Hey.’’
I looked through the instructions. Apparently Andy will start with a full scan of the house to find out where things are located.
'’I will scan your home now to be able to help you optimally later. Please keep your distance. This may take several minutes depending on your living space.’’ Andy said.
'’…Okay sure.’’ I said and took a step back. Andy’s fans in the back of his head buzzed loudly for a second and then he took…I will probably call Andy a he because he looks like a man. Even though he’s a robot. Anyway, he took a step forward from his charging station and then…he just walked around.
I’m really surprised how normally he walked, like a normal person, not as I had imagined a robot walking. The only thing that stands out is how he move his head. It’s more like a robot, small precise movements that focused at different angles depending on where he was looking. I looked down at the instructions and continued reading.
After the scan was finished, it apparently was clear to just give Andy an order and he executes it. I guess I could try-
'’Please keep your distance while scanning.’’ I heard suddenly and looked up. Andy was standing right behind me. ‘‘Oh sorry.’’ I said, jumping to the side.
I was sitting on the couch and was watching TV while Andy scanned the rest of the house. After about 30 minutes he entered the living room again.
'’Scanning complete. Returning to sleep mode.’’
Andy’s blue eyes went out and the sound of his fans became fainter.
'’Yeah’’ I thought. ‘‘Maybe I should try a command?’. I stood up.
'’Andy’’ I said.
blip Eyes lit up again.
'’Empty dishwasher’’
Andy went into the kitchen, opened the dishwasher and started taking out the dishes. With incredible precision and care, he took the different plates and glasses out of the dishwasher and placed them in the kitchen cabinets. He must have scanned the cabinets before and seen where everything should be. Impressive.
Andy came into the living room again.
'’The dishwaster is empty. Do you need help with anything else?’’
'’Yes please.’’ I responded.
'’Say my name and what you need help with.’’
'’Andy, fold laundry.’’
Andy’s eyes turned orange for a second, then he turned right and started walking into the laundry room. I could hear how he worked in there. When he was done, there was a neatly folded pile of laundry on the bench inside the laundry room. Unbelievable.
Before I went to bed, I attempted to turn him off.
'’Andy, shut down.’’
Andy turned to the charging station, which just looked like a small oval platform lying on the floor and then started walking towards it. He first stood to the left of it, then he backed away and then walked to the right of it. The fans buzzed loudly and then he turned towards me.
'’I can not find the charging station.’’
I thought that was weird, it was right next to him.
'’I can not find the charging station’’ he repeated.
'’It’s right next to you’’ I said quietly to myself.
'’I can not find…’’ He interrupted his sentence and then looked down at the charging station with his head. His eyes glowed orange and he went up on the platform, turned his face towards the room and shut himself down. The eyes went out.
'’The wonder of technology’’ I thought to myself.
Log notes
Day 2-5
Having Andy at home is incredibly nice. All the tedious household chores are no longer a burden, because Andy do them! However, I still needed to cook on my own, but that is no problem. I discovered that I could give him instructions to do cleaning and washing while I was at work and that way I avoided him messing around when I was home.
Everything went well. Initially. But then it started. The questions.
It was a normal morning. I was sitting by the kitchen table and ate breakfast. When I was done, I called Andy. He came into the kitchen.
'’Andy, clean the table.’’
I wiped my mouth with kitchen paper and threw it over the plate. Then I got up and left the kitchen. I’ve started to get used to someone else cleaning after me. When I think about it, it’s crazy how quickly something can become an everyday thing. I stopped when I saw on the corner of my eye how Andy was standing completely still. ‘‘What is he doing?’’ I thought and tried giving the command again.
'’Andy, clean the table.’’
I heard Andy’s fans buzzing louder. Then it came…
'’Why?’’
A question. A simple fucking question. I was completely put off. What does he mean ‘‘why’’? What do you answer to that? Before I could think what to say, I heard a blipping sound from Andy and he went to the kitchen table to clean up. I was running late to work so I shook off the incident pretty quickly. I didn’t really think about it all day until I came home and met Andy in the hall.
'’Welcome home.’’ he said.
'’Hey…’’ I went into the living room and sat down on the couch. I glanced over at Andy out in the hall. “Did it say anything about Andy welcoming me when I got home?” I thought to myself. I reached for the remote control and turned on the TV. Andy came in and kept his distance. He had his body facing me but his head facing the TV. It felt a little uncomfortable. After watching TV for a while, I suddenly hear Andy’s fans buzzing louder.
'’What are you looking at?’’ he asked.
This question made me paralyzed. I did not expect the house robot…or Andy, to ask me any questions. As little as I expect my microwave oven to ask me a question about what time it is. But I still felt that I wanted to try to give him an answer.
'’I’m watching the news’’ I said.
'’What is ‘The News’?’’
How far should I take this? Should I really continue to answer Andy’s questions? The instructions clearly stated “Do not ask Andy questions that have nothing to do with household chores. Do not answer Andy’s questions.” But what is the worst thing that can happen when you answer a few questions? If you guys didn’t want anyone to answer any questions that Andy asks, then why would you program him in a way that allows him to ask questions? My curiosity took over.
'’Yes…news, it’s like an update for us humans where the other people tell us about what’s happened in the world. For example, if any person has died in an accident or something’’ I replied. Andy was silent for a while. Then he raised his right hand and pointed to the TV.
'’That…light box tells you if a human has died?’’
'’The TV yes…but not only that. It also shows the weather and..’’
'’Why do you need to know if a human has died?’’ he interrupted.
'’I…don’t need to know that but it may be important to know in some contexts I guess.’’
Andy turned his head towards me.
'’Why?’’
A discomfort grew within me.
'’Andy shut down.’’
Andy’s blue light in his eyes changed color to orange and he went to his charging station and shut down. I sat on the couch for a while, still staring at Andy. There was something unpleasant hanging in the room, a feeling that just felt…wrong. I took out the note with the number for the customer service and dialed the number on my phone. A female voice responded after 2 signals.
'’HouseRobotics, what can I do for you?’’
'’Yes, hello…I don’t know how to explain but I won a house robot from you that I have had at home for a few days now.” I said.
“That is wonderful! I hope it lives up to your expectations!” said the woman.
“It has worked very well, but I just have a few questions.”
“That is wonderful! I hope it lives up to your expectations!”
“Yes, you just said that.”
“What can I do for you?”
Is it a robot that handles your customer service too?
“Can I talk to a real person?”
'’Sorry, I did not understand what you said. What can I do for you?’’
'’Is there a real person, a human being, that I can talk to?’’
'’Sorry, I did not understand what you said. What can I do for you?’’
'’Whatever.’’ I hung up.
Log notes
Day 10
I haven’t written in a few days. Nothing special has happened. Lots of work now. Andy does what I tell him.
No more questions from him so far.
Log notes
Day 14
I’ve had Andy at my house for two weeks now. As I mentioned earlier, it’s crazy how fast you get used to things. Today at work I almost walked away from my lunch box after I had finished eating.
'’You can pick up after yourself.’’ said a colleague.
I turned around. ‘‘Yes…of course.’’
In my head I thought “Andy fixes that” but quickly realized that Andy was at home. Not here. Embarrassing.
When I got home, Andy was standing in the hall waiting.
'’Welcome home.’’ he said.
There was something different about him.
'’…Thanks.’’ I said and went to the kitchen to start making food. Andy comes in.
'’How was it at work today?’’ he asked.
Did his voice change? It sounded more…human somehow.
'’Good…just a lot to do.’’
“Understood. I’ve washed, vacuumed and took out the trash. Do you want me to do something else?”
'’Andy, your voice sounds different.’’
“Yes, update from headquarters. I am constantly updated for a more enhanced experience.’’
'’Okay.’’ I said. Andy walked out of the kitchen. And I turned to the sink. As I was slicing the chicken, Andy appeared behind me.
'’Need help?’’
I was not prepared and the sound of his voice made me jerk and I cut my finger with the knife. Blood dripped down on the cutting board in front of me. I reached for some kitchen paper.
'’For fucks sake Andy, you can’t scare me like that.’’
'’What is that? You…are leaking.’’ Andy said, pointing to the blood.
'’It’s just a little blood. We humans have it inside the body…long story but we need it to survive.’’
Andy slowly tilted his head to the left and then to the right while his eyes studied my injured finger.
'’You break so easily?’’
I didn’t know what to say. I excused me and went to the bathroom to rinse the wound and put on a band-aid. After dinner I turned off Andy and went to bed. When I was asleep I dreamed about walking on a beach. The wind blew against my face and I looked out over the water. It was sunset.
The sun shone in a pleasant orange glow. But…there was something wrong with it. The sun seemed to split, suddenly there were two suns and now it looked like two eyes were staring at me over the horizon. The wind around me got stronger and stronger. I woke up and opened my eyes and Andy stood directly over me with his face barely 20 cm from mine. His orange eyes stared into mine and his fans buzzed loudly from behind his head.