The sound “What is that sound?” I can’t quite put my finger on it, I can’t quite make it out…but I am tired. It’s my mind..playing….. waking me, taking my sleep with that sound, that song..is that a song?
I…I…I have to be to..to.. I have to go…where? Do I have to go? I’m hazy, so very hazy, maybe I’ll just rest a while. Yes….I’ll rest…rest my eyes. Too much to drink? Was I drinking? At least I’m not spinning, I must be home…home in bed?
The tugging, the pulling, the buzzing! Why won’t you let me rest? I am so tired…so very tired, yet that sound it is calling to me, no not calling it’s almost as if it is singing to me…what is that sound?
I’ll look, I’ll look and see, I’ll open my eyes and see…..I will see this beautiful buzzing! I pull, I pull with all my might…I pull….but my eyelids are just so heavy. Why look anyway? Just enjoy the buzzing, the rhythm is entrancing filling me to my very bones. It’s as if I can feel it..pulling…and tugging…tugging at my very being. It’s a strange song so hypnotic.. I think I can make out the words!
I’ll sing along.. just a little…it will help me to remember..remember the song that’s buzzing in my bones!
Were those lyrics that I sang, and did you sing along with me? Are those lyrics to the song….the song…song…that’s buzzing inside me?
Open my eyes, yes I need to see..this music it’s beautiful, I need to see.. I’m not that tired…I’ll just open my eyes.
The light! Oh the light… it hurts but I must look! It hurts my eyes..it’s filling my head….what is that sound? The buzzing…the lights….That sound…. I see…see… a clock? No no a box? No that’s not it my mind is hazy so very hazy…must I look?
The buzzing and beeping are rising in a terrible chorus! How did it I think this was a song? Is it a song? Why can’t I think? What is happening to me?
I can make out a voice! I’ll call out.. I must be sleeping… dreaming… that sounds it’s growing.. why did I think it was a song? Is it a song? “Help”! I croak as my throat is so dry I can barely utter a sound! Did they hear me? Will they help me? Am I dreaming I must be dreaming…. I’m so very tired… I just want to rest..
I hear you! I hear your voice.. can you hear me? “ Help” I try to scream but can barely mutter.. why am I so tired? I must! I must calm out..you must hear me! “Help” I breathed.. I can barely hear myself.
The buzzing and beeping, how incessant it has grown louder and louder filling my very being, I can feel it in my bones. You will hear me! I will shout loudly, I must.. I am scared.. what is happening?? “Help” I cry..”Help”
I can hear myself this time! Joy, so must you… I heard myself… so must you “Help” …….
“Doctor!!”
Did you hear that? I heard it it’s not me! That’s not my voice you heard me…”Help” I breathe, “Help me”.
“He’s alive!” I can hear the surprise..why are you surprised? “He’s alive”…Is that panic? You’re scaring me why are you panicking?
I hear you…I hear you…I know you hear me! Where am I? What’s happening? Why can’t I wake up?
“Help”… I’m scared! You’re scaring me! Why won’t you help me? Wake up! Wake up! I’m dreaming wake the fuck up! Oh God help me…
“Doctor… he is alive!” “Doctor”!!!
The buzzing.. it’s gone.. it has finally stopped.. The quiet is deafening.. I can hear…I can hear… you, you must hear me! What is that sound? Where is the buzzing, the song the song that soothes.. what is happening to me?
“It’s just nerves, steady yourself nurse.”
Who is that? Who is there why can’t I open my eyes? “Help” I try to scream… but nothing nothing more than a wheeze escapes my lips…
“These organs will save lives.”
Organs? Where am I.. I am scared, why won’t you help me?
The sound… it’s back.. it’s back in it’s beautiful mix of bone and steel. No… not a song at all..a chorus of cutting and slicing.
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