“Jesus Christ, alright, I’ll get an Uber!” I told Frank when I made to leave the party. I’d only had a few drinks, but he was insistent that I not drive home. Though it’d be a pain in the ass to come back the next day to pick up my car, I relented and pulled out my phone as I walked out the door.
For a minute, I considered walking. My apartment was only a mile or so away, but it was New Year’s Eve and the temperature was in the teens. Wind whipped down the sidewalk, drifting new fallen snow at my ankles while I pulled my coat tightly around my neck.
‘Fuck it.’ I thought. ‘I’ll deal with the rush charge to not freeze my nuts off.’
Thankfully, I was downtown and there were plenty of drivers out looking to make some cash to pay off holiday debt. In fact, when I put in my address, the app showed there was someone right around the corner making a drop…they’d arrive in three minutes.
‘Good. I can tough it out for a few minutes…I don’t think I could go back inside and deal with Frank’s bullshit for another second.’ I fumed. I knew he was right to stop me from driving, but at the moment all I could focus on was that I was freezing and he was costing me $40.
I checked the app to see who’d be picking me up. Joe…average looking white dude…bald…navy blue Camry…4539 reviews…4.5 starts. Perfectly normal.
As I watched the little car on my phone navigating the digital streets, I turned my attention to the physical intersection it should eventually approach from and saw headlights advancing my direction. It looked like a little sedan and, as it passed under a streetlight, I saw a Toyota logo in the grate. But, when I looked back down at my phone, Joe was still two blocks away. ‘Must be someone else.’ I assumed, and went back to watching the app.
However, out of the corner of my eye I saw the car slow as it neared, eventually making a full stop right in front of where I was standing. While the street was fairly poorly lit, I could at least make out that it was a dark, Toyota sedan and behind the wheel appeared to be a bald white man. The passenger side window rolled down, and the driver leaned over.
“Hello Kevin.” He said.
His voice had an unctuous quality that was innately off-putting. I checked my app again and it showed Joe was still a block away.
“Joe?” I asked, leaning down to get a better look in the window. Unfortunately, there were no distinctive features in his profile picture for me to compare to (scars, tattoos, hook nose), so in the dim light, the best I could make out was he looked similar enough in person.
“Of course.” He replied. “Hurry up and get in. I have many rides to give tonight.”
The app was still showing Joe stopped at an intersection a block away, but with the insane demand of a holiday weekend, I figured it must be a glitch. There was a car right in front of me and the driver knew my name, which I surmised he could have only gotten from the app when I ordered the car. To be honest, the guy was giving me the creeps, but I had my concealed carry and we didn’t have far to go. I hopped in the backseat.
“Welcome to your ride, Kevin.” Said Joe, as he pulled away from the curb.
“Uh…thanks man…” I settled into the backseat. He must have had the heat on full blast as it was blisteringly hot inside. Even though I’d been shivering seconds earlier, I began to sweat almost instantly.
Having taken many Uber rides prior, I expected to see a phone mounted somewhere in the front giving him directions, but there was nothing of the sort. He wasn’t watching a map…actually he wasn’t even watching the road…his eyes were fixed on me in the rearview mirror. The hairs on the back of my neck prickled.
“I’m pleased to have you, Kevin. We have much to discuss.” His expression…mischievous.
I went from a bit creeped out to vigilant. Something was very off about Joe. That slimy voice percolated my very skin and settled in my bones. Reaching into my waistband, I wrapped my hand around the grip of my pistol…just in case.
He grinned widely. “Oh you won’t be needing that.” He said.
That was enough for me. I didn’t know how he knew who I was or who the fuck he was, but instinctively I understood danger. Drawing my weapon, I pointed it straight at his head.
“Look man, I don’t know what the fuck this is, but you’re going to let me out of this car right now!” I clicked the safety off to let him know that I was serious.
He didn’t flinch…didn’t even look surprised really…if I had to describe it, he almost looked bored…maybe even a little annoyed. “Tsk tsk Kevin…so quick to violence. I told you that you wouldn’t need that. We’re just going to talk.”
The gun burned white-hot in my hand, searing my flesh. I dropped it to the floorboard and could see the Beretta logo imprinted in my palm.
‘What the fuck, what the fuck, what the fuck??’ My mind raced. I reached for the door handle and pulled it over and over…nothing happened. I pulled on the lock, but it wouldn’t move. I was trapped.
It was then that I looked out the window and saw that we were moving quickly. Much too quickly for traveling on city streets. Lights were flashing past, blending to a streaking blur. We were accelerating at an inhuman pace…all the while his eyes never flickered from the mirror.
I considered attacking him with my bare hands, thinking if I could knock him out, maybe I could get control of the vehicle. ‘But, will I be able to knock him out?’ I wondered. There was a distinctly malignant essence about him lending me to believe he would not be wounded by mortal means.
Dread seeded in the pit of my stomach as I sat back and accepted the futility of my situation. There was nothing I could do…I was at his mercy.
“That’s it, Kevin. Sit back…relax…as I said, I just want to talk.” His tone mimicked soothing, but each syllable dripped with enmity.
I did my best to compose myself. He clearly had all the power there, but all he was doing was watching me. What did he want?
“Okay…what is this? Who are you…or rather…what are you?” I asked.
“I told you, Kevin, this is your ride. And who I am is irrelevant, I am different to everyone that I meet. To you I’m Joe, to Joe I might be Mary, to Mary I might even be you. I am whoever I need to be. What I am though…is an opportunity.” He said with shrewd efficacy.
“An opportunity…what the hell does that even mean? All I want is to go home. Please just let me go home. I’ll give you anything that you want.” I pleaded.
“Oh, but you already have. You see, you don’t remember, but you and I have met before.” He paused, allowing his words to sink in.
Faster we kept moving. The heat rising by the minute.
“What are you talking about? I’ve never met you before, at least not that I remember…was I drunk or something?” I wracked my memories trying to recall a previous interaction.
“You misunderstand me. You and I have not met before, but YOU and I have met…in your previous life. I am what’s known as a Broker, and WE made a deal.” Again he paused, watching my reaction in the mirror.
“What the fuck does that mean?? This doesn’t make any sense…I don’t remember anything about a previous life…I don’t remember ever meeting you before or making any sort of deal with you. Please just let me out!” I continued to plead with him.
“What you remember matters not to me. I remember every deal I’ve ever made, and yours has a term that’s coming due. In exchange for wealth and status in your last life…you offered me this one.” Delight flashed across his edifice.
Faster and faster. Hotter and hotter.
At this point, I was in a blind panic. “How can you hold me responsible for something I did in a previous life…something that you know I don’t remember doing? That wasn’t me, that was some other guy!” What he was saying was ludicrous, but I inherently knew it to be true.
“Humans. Always so focused on the present…never thinking in terms of the eternal. Of course that was YOU! YOU signed the agreement without a second thought! I told you that the more you asked for, the more years I would take off your next life…that I would come to claim your soul once the remaining years were spent…that you would be damned for all eternity. YOU didn’t care! Your own greed limited this life to just thirty years. Tell me Kevin, was it worth it?” Malicious glee filled his voice. He was lavishing in my torment, cackling as I started to cry.
“I don’t know!! I don’t remember any of it! Please forgive me, please forgive the debt! I’m so sorry! I take it back!” I knew now that I wasn’t just begging for my life, I was begging for my very soul.
His revelry peaked. “You can’t take it back now! That life was already lived! I held up my end of the bargain, now it’s time for you to hold up yours!”
The engine roared as our impossible acceleration continued. The sweltering heat…unbearable.
“Please, please there has to be some way! You said you’re a Broker…let’s make a deal. There must be something I can offer you?” Beseeching him for any way out.
“As I’ve told you repeatedly, our deal was already made! I’ve merely come to collect payment.” He responded maniacally.
Despair gripped my heart and pumped anguish through my veins. There was nothing I could do… “But wait, you said this life would be limited to thirty years…I’m not thirty yet. I don’t turn thirty until November.”
His demeanor shifted. The fervent depravity with which he’d sealed my fate abated and he became almost businesslike.
“Ah, yes…Well, as I mentioned, I am here to offer you an opportunity. I’ve watched your life since the day you were born and my patience is waning. Miserable existence you’ve had really…I can’t imagine why you’d want to continue with it. But, I always keep my word…so, you have a choice. You can come with me now and we can take this ride straight down into the abyss…or I can drop you off at home. You’ll have a few more months before I return…but know that I will return. This ride is inevitable.” He offered.
My immediate reaction was to ask to go home, it’s all I’d been asking for since he picked me up. Surely that’s still what I wanted…to go home and have a little more time with my life before forever. But what he’d said was true. My life so far had been wasted. I’d done nothing of note, impressed no one, left no legacy… ‘If I take the ride with him now…I’ll be forgotten within a year.’ I thought veraciously. What really, then, was the point of going on when I’d have a death sentence looming?
He waited patiently for my answer, never blinking, just watching me in the mirror. Finally…I decided. “No…no I don’t want to go with you now…I want to go home.”
Whatever I was returning to in my life, at least it was ‘known’. Where he’d be taking me…well I didn’t want to think about that yet.
For the first time, he looked slightly surprised, yet he simply shrugged his shoulders and said, “As you wish…I will be seeing you, Kevin.”
And suddenly, we were parked in front of my building. The locks clicked…I reached for the handle and pulled…the door opened. Without a seconds hesitation, I dove out into the snow, slamming the door behind me before sprinting as fast as I could away from “Joe.” I never looked back.
Once I got into my apartment, I downed shots of whiskey until my hands stopped shaking…enough to make me believe maybe it wasn’t real…maybe someone at the party had spiked the punch with LSD… Eventually I passed out on the couch.
When I awoke the next morning, I momentarily forgot “Joe”. The normalcy of waking up with a hangover in my living room reinforced the fallacy that my life had not been inexorably altered. That is, until I looked down at the palm of my hand…and saw the Beretta logo…