Eternal, boundless, undecay’d,
A thought unseen, but seeing all,
All, all in earth or skies display’d,
Shall it survey, shall it recall:
Each fainter trace that memory holds
So darkly of departed years,
In one broad glance the soul beholds,
And all, that was, at once appears.
When Coldness Wraps This Suffering Clay, Paragraph two.
Lord Byron, 1815
~
In the morning, I sat at a makeshift table set near the front of the plane. My sunken eyes were half closed as I cradled my cup of coffee. May was watching a movie on one of the plane’s TVs while playing her Switch.
“Not much sleep last night?” Carol said as she sat next to me.
“Another nightmare. I’m just glad I didn’t wake you this time.” I said. My voice was rough.
“I’m so sorry, Meg. I wished those meds had worked. I don’t mind if you wake me up when that stuff happens, you know. I can be there.”
“I know. Thanks, Carol. I didn’t last night because, well, May had a nightmare too. And I think it was similar to the one I have.”
Carol raised an eyebrow.
“You two had the same nightmare?”
“Good morning, ladies,” Frederick interrupted with a smile. “We have a wonderful breakfast prepared for you. Would you care for a plate? We have taken your dietary restrictions into account of course.”
“Yes, I’m fuc–” Carol glanced at May. “I mean, I’m quite starving, Freddy.”
“Yes please, Freddy.” May said.
I smiled.
“Yeah, I think that we’d all like some. Thanks, Freddy.” I returned.
His smile became somewhat frail.
“Of course. I’ll be back soon.”
We had our breakfast together, and watched the movie as the plane coasted across the sky.
In one more hour, we finally arrived in the appropriate city. We buckled back in as the jet coasted down, then drifted onto the runway.
It parked and opened its doors. There were two dressed up men dragging our luggage on carts. Frederick showed us out from the plane, then to the airport lobby, then to a limo waiting out front. Everyone glanced at us, wondering exactly why we had a limo.
The limo rolled its front window down. I smiled when I saw the driver.
It was someone my mom had always had employed ever since I can remember. He had even helped me escape the house a few times when I just needed to get out. He was in his fifties with graying hair combed back and a formed mustache. He wore dress pants and a button up,
“Hey, David.” I said. The older man smiled back at me. He stepped out of the vehicle and gave us all hugs.
“David, my man.” Carol said.
“Mister Davie!” May said.
“Megan, May, Carol, it’s so good to see you three in good health. It’s been a long time.” He said.
“It has been too long.” I said.
He gestured to his limo.
“Please, get comfortable. I’ll bring you to the hospital where your mother is staying.”
Frederick opened the door and helped us inside. We waved goodbye to Freddy as he closed the door, and I caught a look of relief on his face.
David was silhouetted behind a tinted window. He started up the limo, and our ride began. As soon as we were off, May was investigating the fancy interior and touching everything.
“May, don’t touch that.” I said.
“Why not? I’ve never seen red cider before, it probably tastes like grapes.”
“That’s not cider, but it probably tastes a little like grapes. Put it back please. Look, David even left an apple juice special for you.” I said.
May looked confused and put the bottle back. She drank from the apple juice carton, but it only kept her occupied for approximately a second.
“May, you’re leaving fingerprints all over. Just sit down.” I said.
“I think that I fancy this fancy ride. A girl could get used to this kind of treatment.” Carol said, leaning back.
“Well don’t. It’s just while we’re here. Don’t let my mom’s siren song make you think she’s any more generous than– May, come on, what are you doing?”
She had rolled down a window and was leaning out. Her open mouth let her cheeks flap in the wind.
“What?” She muttered in a distorted voice.
Carol laughed, and in staring at the two of them, I couldn’t help it. I laughed too. It seemed that none of us had really laughed in a while. Carol pulled May back in with a tickle hug and rolled up the window.
I used the distraction to pour myself a glass of wine. I took a sip. I’d be damned if I didn’t admit how delicious it was. It was sweet, like an apple plucked from the tree right before it could sour, it was– wait, that’s not right. Apples? Whatever, it was delicious.
“Hey wait for me.” Carol said, putting May down and snatching my glass. After a sip, she hummed with appreciation.
“This wine is damn fine, what vintage is it?” She said.
“Would you know what it meant?” I teased.
Carol raised a brow, putting on her fake English accent again. “I’ll have you know that I am a connoisseur! A connoisseur I say. I have a nickname amongst the gentler gatherings of wine samplers that would simply go over your tiny little head.”
“Oh? And what nickname is that?” I said.
“It’s probably ‘Miss Stinky Feet’.” May said with a chuckle. Carol and I laughed again.
“How pray tell did you know that, young Miss? Yes, they say I am a smell that takes the tannins’ breath away.” Carol said.
“What even are tannins?” I said.
“Something that makes the wine good? I don’t know.” Carol shrugged.
She offered me the glass back and I took it.
“Since I made you two laugh twice, you have to let me try it. Rule of twos.” May said.
“I think you mean the rule of threes.” I said.
“Ahh so that was your plot all along. Well played, Lady May,” Carol said. “Buuuut I suppose that would be more up to your sister, the First Lady. It’s not for kids after all.”
May was on me in a pounce and nearly spilled it. “Please please, please?” She begged.
“How about this? You can smell it. If you can stand the smell, you can sip a drop.” I said.
“Smell it?”
“Yep.” I held it out for her to inspect.
May leaned in like Indiana Jones reaching for the golden idol. She daintily positioned her nose and took a distinct whiff. There was a silent moment among the three of us before May leapt back like an offended cat.
“Ew, you drink that? It smells like Germ-X!” She said.
Carol made a glass of her own, held eye contact, and took a draining drink from it. May looked disgusted and awed.
“See?” I said. “It’s just another gross adult thing. If you’re not careful, you might turn into one of us.”
The window to the driver rolled down. “Is everything all right back there?” David said.
“Just peachy. Sorry, David. Thanks for the wine and juice box.” I said. David smiled.
It was nice to have this moment, but I couldn’t help but feel that it would be over soon. We would arrive at the hospital, and have to face our dying asshole mother.
Maybe coming home was a bad idea.
~
The cheeriness left in me soured once we arrived at the hospital. We stepped out of the car and started towards the main entrance. I began to wish that I had another glass of that wine.
The hospital was in a business district of the city. It was a tall, dark windowed building with a giant parking lot. The fact that they had valet services made me roll my eyes. There were several expensive cars here, yet somehow I doubted they were more expensive than a five minute ride in one of the ambulances.
The main doors were automatic, under a concrete canopy like most hospitals. Seeing it on the outside made me wonder why my mom would stoop to such a normal standard hospital, then I saw the inside.
While nondescript on the outside, the inside was almost as gold as my mother’s plane. Almost. The walls were decorated with reflective tile, and I kid you not, there were chandeliers in the lobby. Chandeliers. If I didn’t know my mother, I would have thought that David had dropped us off at a luxury hotel. Even some of the staff had shimmery looking scrubs. I wouldn’t have been surprised if my mother had built this hospital just for her stay.
All of this eye rolling was making me dizzy.
Carol and I held May’s hands as we walked through the lobby. Someone approached us before we even made it to the desk.
“You must be the Audlins. Please come with me.” A nurse said.
He showed us to the appropriate room. It involved an awkward elevator ride to the 6th floor, room number 6.
“Please stay here for a moment while I make sure that Mrs. Audlin is awake.” The nurse said, and entered the room.
May tried to peek in as the nurse entered, and clutched my hand a little harder. We stood awkwardly as a gurnee passed.
“Do you think that mom will be okay?” May asked in a whisper. I tried to think of something comforting to say, but I was quite aloof myself.
“I don’t know.” I said. Carol seemed to sense my mood and leaned down to May’s level. She put a hand on her shoulder.
“It seems scary now, I know, but it’ll be okay no matter what happens. All right, May?”
May sniffled. “Okay.” She said. We all shared a hug.
“Your mother is ready for you.” The nurse said as he left the room.
“I’ll stay out here.” Carol said. I nodded apologetically.
“No,” May said. “You can come with us.”
“It’s okay, May. I’ll be right here when you’re done. Someone has to keep a lookout for monsters.” Carol said.
May nodded and we were filed in after the nurse.
Mother laid in a black hospital bed, draped in silk sheets and surrounded by drawn curtains. May’s eyes darted around the well kept room. She clutched my hand like it was her only life raft. There were IVs, patient monitors, and many other bells and whistles that I don’t know the names of.
It wasn’t easy to see her again. She was dressed and made up to perfection despite being in a hospital. She didn’t look to be in her late forties though, as she would be now. She looked more… How do I say this? She looked like an unwrapped mummy. Skin gray as ash, sunken, drained. That above all else curled my stomach into a knot.
She really was sick.
“Mrs. Audlin? Your daughters are here.” The nurse said sweetly.
Mother rolled her head to the side. Her eyes had always startled me and they did now. Not their color or anything, but something behind them. At times, there was a fire there, something destructive and dark that burned all nearby. At others, it was absent, and she may as well have been a different person for her kindness and apologies.
It seemed that she hadn’t changed. Her eyes held that darkness.
“Mabel? Magdalene?” She said with a rasp. I said nothing and pulled May closer.
“It took you long enough,” Mother sneered. Her eyes darted around the room. “And I see that you were smart enough not to bring that pet of yours.”
“My what?” I was gearing up for a retort, but May squeezed my hand. I sighed and buried it. “Carol is here, mother. Despite your ill favor. She’s just waiting outside as to not offend your fragile fucking sensibility.”
“Don’t spew such foul language from your mouth,” Mother snapped. “It is good that she is absent. She is not allowed in my presence.”
“You’ve made that quite clear. Now did you want us here to say something or did you just want to spit ignorance?” I said.
There was a long quiet between us. We listened to the slow beep of her heart monitor.
“You have nothing to say to me then?” Her words broke into a cough. She stared at us, waiting for a reply, but neither I or May said anything. “I see. I will likely have to be here for weeks on end with no restitution, but it seems you do not care. I am surprised that you bothered to show up at all.”
“So am I. If you wanted us here so badly, why didn’t you just call us? We could have been here weeks ago. I didn’t get your stupid letter until yesterday.”
Mother scoffed.
“If you knew as much as I did, you wouldn’t be so quick to trust such devices. There’s always something listening.”
May was biting her lip and burying further into me.
“What do you want from us? Huh? You wouldn’t have talked to us if you didn’t want something. Want me to write your obituary? I’ll put, ‘yep, she really put the bitch in obituary’. Hello? Are you hearing me?”
Mother had turned to stare at the television above the bed. Thing is, it was off.
“Well?” I said.
Mother blinked. Her eyes were suddenly drained of that darkness. She swallowed hard and her voice was softer, her skin brighter. That entirely different person had taken her place. When she looked at me, she was surprised.
“Magdalene? What are you doing here?” She glanced down at May. Fear and realization filled her eyes. “Listen, you’re in danger. You shouldn’t have come– Please be careful, beware the man in the red suit. He must have done this. He wants you here.”
I froze. The ‘man in a red suit’?
I thought of the glimpse of that figure I had seen at home, of the airport employee. I stared at my mother, uncomprehending.
“But you wanted us here.” May said.
“What are you talking about? What ‘man in a red suit’?” I said.
“That’s what I said, isn’t it? He’s a real nice fellow, nice as they come.” Mother snapped, her eyes and skin shifting again.
The nurse retrieved papers and put them down. I hadn’t noticed until he came close to me, but something was off about his smile. Now that I was looking, his scrubs were colored red.
“Look over these and leave me. I’m tired. I’ve arranged for a hotel room in a nearby complex, as much as you don’t deserve it. Two beds, mind you, and I’m not changing that fact. Now get out.”
I studied my mother. Feeling so confused and afraid as I was, the only thing I could do was take the documents, and pull May from the room.
I shake knowing what I know now. Maybe if I had acted then, I could have stopped what was to come.
We went straight to the hotel once we left the hospital. There wasn’t much talking on the way. Carol respected our silence for a while, and this time, I did take that second glass of wine.
The hotel was just as insipid as the rest of my mother’s accommodations. I was growing tired of the color gold. Still I felt better being far away from whatever just happened at the hospital.
“Really? She made a point of not renting three beds?” Carol said a bit later in the hotel room.
“Yeah. Apparently she thinks we don’t sleep in the same bed, and one of us will have to occupy the lowly couch.” I said with feigned worry. Carol spoke like a court Lady.
“Oh no, the couch? What a terrible turn of fate,” Her normal tone returned. “Wait, does she mean the sitting room, drawing room, or bedroom couch? There’s that loveseat too. Hmm, confusing.”
I scoffed. “My mother has strange ideas about what hardship is. Hard times for her is staying at a five star hotel instead of a luxury resort.” I said.
Carol raised an eyebrow. “What does your mom even do to have so much money?”
“She’s old money. Her and my father both. I think it’s something about devilishly lucky investments in the 2000s, industry in the 1900s, and even railroad and plantations in the 1800s. Oh, and also oil.”
“Ah, that’s right. That would do it.” Carol said.
I looked around. May had gone off somewhere. I thought that I should go find her. The last thing I wanted her to be was alone after that debacle.
“Have you seen May?” I said.
Carol pointed. “She went to the drawing room, I think.”
“The drawing room?” I said.
“Yeah, didn’t they call an extra room that in Game of Thrones or something?”
I shook my head and went to find May.
“What? It seems perfectly fine for drawing!” Carol called.
May was there, staring out of the window across the city. She half-heartedly hovered her robot plane over the window as if it soared outside. She held her head up with the other hand. It looked like there was a storm brewing out there.
“Hey May,” I said. “Are you doing all right?” She continued to fly her robot.
“I guess.”
“Is there anything that you want to talk about?”
“Probably, but I wouldn’t do a good job of it.” May said.
I chuckled. “That’s a surprisingly grown up thing to say.”
“Why are you surprised? I am grown up.” May said.
“You’re right. My mistake.”
I sat next to her.
“Why does mom hate us like that?” May said. I bit my lip.
“I don’t know, sis.”
“I don’t like when people are mean to us. They’re mean to you and Carol sometimes. I wish that I could stop them.” May said.
“Mom does act weird sometimes. Maybe your transformer has something to say about it?”
May smiled and put it up to her ear. She jiggled the robot and muttered under her breath.
“What’s that, Mr. Robot?” She said. Her robot ‘spoke’ again. “Hmm, that makes sense.”
“What did he say?” I asked.
“Mr. Robot says that it’s really simple. Mom is just a bitch.”
My eyes went wide. I froze like a deer in headlights.
“It wasn’t me.” I heard Carol call from the other room.
“Mr. Robot has quite the potty mouth.” May said.
“I dare say that he does,” I muttered, then caught myself. “Uh, maybe don’t say that to anyone else? Ever. Please? No– uh, bad words?”
She had an evil glint in her eye that seemed to say, I’ve heard much worse from you. May zipped her lips as she smiled a witchy grin.
“Okay, well I have to go through some of those papers mom gave us, but just come get Carol or I if you need something.”
As I left, May didn’t seem entirely happy, but Mr. Robot was a little more energetic in his storm-ridden flight. I went into the kitchen to look over the documents.
The rest of the day passed a little easier. At least a hotel room was good for that. When May and Carol eventually went to sleep that night, I slipped out of bed to read more of the paperwork that needed signing. I couldn’t sleep anyway. I didn’t really have to ‘slip’ out of bed either, as Carol wouldn’t wake up from an earthquake. The only thing that really got to her were my nightmares.
It was May who had what I like to call, ‘sleep echolocation’. She had more night awareness than a cat on catnip. I made sure to tip toe until I was past her room, then sat down at the grandiose table just outside of the kitchen. A clock I hadn’t noticed before ticked quietly.
I held my head in my hand as I read over the pages of conflated lawyer talk. Once I made it through term-defining pages, it was starting to look like some kind of will and testament, attached with bank-related paperwork. As I read on, it seemed like my mother wanted to give me… well, everything, in the case of her death.
Her mansion was specifically listed here, her money and other accounts, everything. I was astonished to say the least.
When my mom initially found out about Carol, she was dead set on not giving me a bent penny. After my father mysteriously passed away, her wishes became law. She was set on giving me nothing before so what had changed? I thought of that look in her eyes. The dark fire, then the fear.
“Magdalene? What are you doing here?”
I stopped reading for a second. I thought that I had heard a light springy sort of sound. I waited. I glanced around the dark expanse of the rooms. The bedrooms, ‘drawing room’, living room, then the front door. I heard it again and watched as the front door’s handle jiggled. There were muttered voices.
The lock beeped as if someone was pressing the wrong keycard against it. I had jumped, the sound was loud. I got up to open the door and explain that they had the wrong room. I had my hand on the handle when they spoke again.
“Hello, little girl,”
I stumbled back.
“Would you be a dear and come play this box for me? I know you’re in there. You and your little sister. I’ve been waiting for a long, long time for you to return. Release us.”
I could hear that song tinkling away out there. The door seemed to groan and creak, then stopped.
My heart beat a little faster as I leaned to the peephole. The light from the hallway drifted onto my face. There was nothing, then an eye. It was large, more insect-like than human. It was slimy and oily black. I would have fallen backwards in fear, but I was pulled against the door by something I couldn’t see.
“Do you know what they dug up, Magdalene?” It said frantically behind the door. “Something they wished they could bury again. It was death that they found below. Death. Don’t you wish I was buried, Magdalene? I was found upon the shore; Lost at sea with less than light.”
I wanted to scream, but I couldn’t. There was frantic knocking on the door. It quickened to an aggressive bashing. The door seemed to crack under the force. It was going to break. I was held there, forced to listen, unable to move, unable to cry for help.
“Magdalene?” It said. “Won’t you open the door? Please, It’s urgent.”
I was breathing too fast. I had to slow myself down. The strange force holding me there seemed to melt away, and when I blinked, and saw two familiar faces through the peephole instead.
“David?”
“Yes, it’s me. I have a message for you. I’m sorry it’s so late.” David said.
I held there for a moment, but opened the door. David seemed tired, who wouldn’t be at this hour, but held to his duty with strength.
Grant was the second person there. This was the first time I’d seen him in years. He was older than I remembered, though I guess that’s what happens when you don’t see someone for a while.
“Hello, Miss Audlin.” Grant said.
“Hey, Grant. Long time no see.” I said. David laughed as if I had said something funny.
“I’m so sorry for disturbing you so late, but your mother wants to see you right away.” David said.
I checked my phone. “She wants to meet again at nearly four in the morning?”
David looked me up and down.
“Yes, I know. I don’t know the reason either. And if you want to stay in your superhero pajamas, that is completely valid.”
“Uh, right– do you two want to just come in for a sec?”
David gave me an odd look.
“Sure, thank you. I’ll be careful not to wake the little one.” David said.
“May doesn’t need to come with us?”
“Ah, apologies, your mother wishes to speak to you alone, Magdalene.” Grant said.
There was something strange in the way Grant was looking at me. His eyes were sharp. Something else clicked too. I hadn’t noticed on the phone, but Grant was speaking much more annunciated, much cleaner than I remember.
“Your mother wanted to see you alone.” David said.
I nodded and closed the door as they stepped in. I heard stirring in the master bedroom that Carol and I had taken. Before I could react, someone opened it.
“Meg? Mister Davie?” May said, rubbing her eyes. Had she come into the master bedroom while I wasn’t looking?
“Hey, little sis. Aren’t you supposed to be asleep?”
“You’re not.” She said.
David chuckled.
“Fair enough. Look though, I have to run an errand, okay? I’ll be back in a little while.” I said. She looked confused, but nodded.
“Did you have another nightmare?” I whispered.
She glanced in Grant’s direction and shrugged. She seemed almost scared for some reason.
“It’s mom, isn’t it? She wants to see you.” May said.
“Yeah. That’s right. Just go back to bed, okay? You can still sleep in there with Carol if you want. We can enjoy breakfast sooner if you go to sleep.”
“I hear they have a machine that automatically makes you pancakes.” David said.
“Okay.” She said. I tousled her hair, and she gave a half smile.
I replaced my superhero attire in the bathroom and returned to the main area. I looked around, confused.
“Where’s Grant? Did he go use the restroom?”
David frowned.
“Grant is waiting in the limo.” David said.
“Oh, he went back to the limo just now?” I said.
“No, he stayed down there initially. I came up here alone,” I felt a little dizzy. “Are you doing all right?” David added.
“Yep. Let’s just get this over with. Mother’s lucky that I couldn’t sleep tonight, or there’d be Hell to pay.”
Hell, was that where I was? Where else would nightmares leak into reality? Was I going crazy?
Still, I couldn’t shake the feeling that my mother was tied to this somehow. I knew something was wrong, and I was afraid to go with David. What would be waiting for me at the hospital this time?
No, I should go, and I would get answers.
David drove us back to the hospital. Grant sat up front with David, and I couldn’t help but feel uneasy near him. He didn’t even look at me once though.
The limo felt lonely all by myself in the dark. Too bad it was early for wine.
Even at this hour, the city had a fair amount of traffic. The hospital staff parking lot was still packed of course, but the public lot was nearly empty. David stopped at the entrance and went to park.
“I ought to come with you, Miss Audlin.” Grant said.
“No, thanks. Just stay with David.”
“As you wish.”
I studied Grant, but saw nothing off. He just looked at me with a raised eyebrow so I headed inside before he could ask.
It was as dark and dismal as a closed museum. The decorations made it feel like one is fact. A nurse approached me almost immediately out of nowhere. I jumped when he spoke. It was the same nurse from before. Same odd smile, but their scrubs were black not red.
“Ah, Miss Audlin. Please, come with me. We have been expecting you.”
I was led to her room again. Floor 6, Room 6. We soon stood outside of the door. The hospital seemed oddly dead and abandoned. I glanced down the hall, but quickly looked away. It was too long. Too dark. It felt like something was waiting there.
“I will wait here, Miss Audlin. Your mother was quite adamant that only you were present.” The nurse said, and opened the door.
He closed it behind me as I stepped in. At the click, my mother turned her head as the monitor beeped her heart rate. It was dark in here. The moonlight entering through the window made her silhouette seem sinister. Really, every shadow seemed that way after my experiences today.
“Magd– sorry, I know you hate that name. Megan, thank you for coming” She said.
I said nothing.
“Please, come closer. We don’t have any time to waste. There is much to say.”
I was confused and wary. In past years, she had lashed out at me after a kind spell before. I walked over and sat by the bed.
“I know that any fondness you could have had for me has dwindled over the years,” Mother began. “I do not entirely know the extent of what I have done to you, but that is part of the reason why I needed to see you while he is… gone. I wanted to explain. I know you do not and should not feel the need to listen to me, but please, listen now.”
“What do you mean you don’t know? You should know perfectly well what’s happened.” I said.
She nodded.
“I have not been wholly myself, Megan. For years. I did some terrible things, and now I am paying for it. Something has taken over me. It is like waking and sleeping, but not being able to tell my dream from reality. This thing seems to revert me back to the mean person I was all those years ago.”
“Mom, you’ve treated May, Carol, and I like–”
“I know. I know. The things I’ve done are probably what attracted this thing, and I know what I have done. There’s no taking it back. I won’t try to excuse myself.”
“What the hell are you talking about? Something taking over you? You’re not making any sense.” I said.
She stared out of the window for a moment.
“You’ve seen him, haven’t you? The man in the red suit? I saw the terror on your face when I mentioned him earlier.”
The look on my face must have spoken for me.
“They lied to me, Megan,” Mother said. “They told me that it could solve all of our problems, help me repent for everything that I’ve done. He lied. Don’t let him out, no matter what he– no, it promises. Protect May.”
She was scaring me. Part of me continued to shout how absurd this all was. Haunting, possession, whatever you called it, couldn’t be real. Yet I had seen strange things lately. But I also hadn’t been sleeping. I also knew my mother and what she would do to get out of things. What was really happening?
She grabbed my hand.
“West tried to warn your father and I, but we didn’t listen. We bought the box from the museum auction anyway, and then it took your father. Listen, Megan. There’s someone who can help you where I can’t. Call Myles West.”
I looked down at my hand as she pressed a paper scrap into it.
“Please, Megan. I can feel it trying. Please. Don’t let it out. You and May are the only ones who can keep it trapped.”
I couldn’t say anything. I couldn’t even begin to process it all. What the hell was she talking about? Myles West?
“Don’t forget to watch the house.” My mother said darkly. She thrust keys into my chest before beginning to laugh.
“My little Magdalene, run home, run!”
I stumbled out of my chair and stared at her with horror. She laughed and laughed like an insane clown. She began to convulse.
My mom’s heart monitor beeped some kind of alarm. The nurse and several others rushed in and pushed me aside. I slowly stepped as I was escorted. All I could do was stare at my mother.
Amongst the staff, I thought I saw someone out of place. An odd sort of person, looking over her bed and pulling on black gloves. He was in a red suit, skin pale and taught.
He smiled a cutting, terrifying smile as the door was closed behind me.