I first saw her when I was 14 years old, I didn’t expect it, the woman in the window. It was a day like any other, I was walking home from school, another day of teachers talking endlessly of how the world was coming to an end and I drifted through my small neighborhood humming the latest Eminem beat. I was half way home when a quaint brick house caught my eye, there wasn’t anything special about it; just your average two story suburban home, but for whatever reason the mere sight gravitated my gaze to it. I stood in front of the house staring with bewilderment, the streets feeling more empty than before and that’s when my stare crawled up to the second story bedroom window. There she stood, staring out into the street, unmoving.
At first I wasn’t too sure if she was looking down at me, so, I gave her a polite wave as a slight smile forced itself on my face. She remained the same, not acknowledging my presence and I began to feel uneasy by her odd behavior. I couldn’t look away, for whatever reason she had captivated my full attention and it didn’t take long for me to realize how beautiful she was. She was the embodiment of the perfect woman, long blonde hair with ocean blue eyes, her full lips pulsated my heart to a beat faster than I thought was possible. I noticed a few things looking at this woman, she was smiling but it seemed forced; as if someone was telling her to smile and I wasn’t too sure but I think I could almost see a tear form on the edges of her eyes. The sensation of being captivated and terrified crashed into one emotion; one that urged me to run home. I didn’t tell my parents about my little encounter, I mean I figured there was nothing to tell, besides they would of thought me as some creep leering at some stranger.
That night I couldn’t sleep, I must of tossed and turned for hours, glimpse’s of that woman swirled around my mind as the darkness that encapsulated my room cautiously vanished as the sun rose. Why couldn’t I get her out of my head, that smile, it was just so enchanting as if she was calling out to me and in the moment it felt as if I was the only person in the world. I felt beyond tired the next morning, maybe I had gotten a few minutes of sleep and I sluggishly walked to school not bothering to be on time. I walked by the same street from the day prior but I couldn’t find the house, I didn’t think on it too long; I figured I most likely passed it not giving notice because of my sleep deprived state.
My eyes were all too heavy for the rest of the day and I most of been told by several teachers to wake up, my friends giggling each time it happened. Being a 14 year old boy I couldn’t wait to explain to them what I had seen, I knew their curiosities would be peaked as much as mine. During lunch we all gathered and I described in vivid detail at what I witnessed, they all gawked at me with gaping mouths; enthralled in the idea of some beautiful woman staring down at me. Of course they wanted to find the house after school, I felt hesitant, not because I was timid but rather I wanted the moment of being seen by that woman just to myself. Though, after much badgering I reluctantly agreed to take my buddies there after school.
We met at the front steps to our schools entrance, I saw that my friends had told others about my encounter and a small squad we originally were was now large enough to fill a football roster; I even saw one older kid who was a sophomore. Each one of my new friends kept asking me the same question, one that caused me to roll my eyes every time,
“No she wasn’t naked” I would yelp out with annoyance.
Still everyone was all to eager to see this mystery woman and I led my new posse down the streets I remember walking down. At first I felt confident that I would quickly find the home, since I remember only walking a few blocks before discovering it, but, after turning several corners the realization of feeling a bit lost inundated my sense of direction. Grunts and moans started coming from my friends, all too impatient, I tried to calm them by saying it was only a few more streets down but that promise was soon shattered. I couldn’t understand it, there was no two story brick house, in fact almost every home that we passed were single story.
I scratched at my head trying to recall where the darn house was, but my deep thought was broken by my friends calling me names; angered at the thought of me lying to them. The eldest kid even punched me in the gut, I fell to the floor like a sack of potatoes and as I laid on some strangers yard gasping out for air, I questioned my own sanity thinking I might of have imagined the whole thing. Everyone left me drowning in my own delusion as they all walked away, I felt defeated, silly that I led a small mob to leer at some poor woman; but worse it seemed as if she wasn’t even real.
I slowly walked home in shame, dragging my back pack behind me, each step feeling heavier than the last. My head was tilted toward the pavement not bothering to look ahead, that’s when I tripped over a small crack in the sidewalk and for the second time that day I found myself on the ground. This is when I picked up on a faint smell, one that seemed familiar, I looked around and saw that the streets were a lot more vacant; all sounds coming to a halt. A soft haze flowed around me as I stood to my feet and to my wonderment there stood the two story brick house, some how I how found myself back to the home that had evaded me. My heart began to accelerate, a bit of sweat flowed off the side of my face as I looked up to the bedroom window.
There she was, like the day before just staring out the window, my eyes widen with enchantment, she was beyond gorgeous; she was exquisite. She was still smiling but not at me, to whom she was blessing with her perfect smile was unknown, her gaze seem to trail off into some distance; a place I wasn’t allowed to know. Though, I still could see through the facade of her happiness, an allure of devastation continued emanating from her and this time I spoke.
“Are you okay?” I cowardly whimpered out.
My timid yelp fell on deaf ears as she remained unmoved, I questioned if perhaps she was some mannequin, a life size doll that some weirdo had built to indulge their fantasy. This was a solid conclusion, an explanation to my newly found mystery, but that’s when I saw her blink; the movement so rapid it caused me to shudder — she was real. I don’t know how long I stood there, leering at her, time seemed to fade into the ether as my soul flowed out to the universe through this woman and before I knew it the sun had set leaving me shrouded in darkness. Through much effort I decided to leave the comfort of my blissful view and I headed home.
I dreamed of the woman in window that night, still smiling in my own personal world, but here in my domain, she was smiling at me; reaching out to my very being with her gaze acting as outstretched arms — embracing me into her warmth. I would walk towards her in my dreams, wanting to be with her but I was never able to reach the window; it slowly moving away the more I walked towards it; like an never ending treadmill. I usually woke up drenched in my own sweat, it was a sensation like no other and my life seemed to revolve around the mystery of this woman. I wouldn’t see her every day, sometimes I would go weeks before seeing the brick house, some how it would appear to me in different places. I would try retracing my steps but it was pointless, the location was ever changing, almost as if she chose when to reveal herself to me. The times I wouldn’t see her, she would still make an appearance in my dreams, my world was imploding into one perspective; one where the sun rose and set for her.
No one ever believed me about the woman in the window, most thought of me as delusional; a young boy obsessed with an illusion. Maybe they were right, after all I did change, I no longer hung out with my friends or even tried to date, my mind was all too enthralled with her. In my senior year one of my old buddies that I hadn’t seen in awhile set me up on a double date, I protested the idea, I wasn’t too sure if “she” — the woman in the window — would allow it. Either way my friend didn’t take ‘no’ for an answer and we all went out, this is where I met Amber.
She was amazing, we found interest in the most similar things and for the first time in months I felt a personal connection with someone else other than “her” — the woman in the window. Me and Amber dated for the remainder of the school year, it was probably the most beautiful time of my life, memories forming that would last a life time but sadly she had plans to move out of state for college and like most we broke up at the end of that summer. Funny thing was during the time I was dating Amber the woman in the window seemed to disappear; something I didn’t realize and it wasn’t until I was once again single did she come back to me.
As I entered college my visits with the ‘woman in the window’ became more frequent, each encounter a replica of the last — always smiling while hiding her pain. The appearances were random, sometimes I would be walking back to the dorm and it would happen, a bit of mist would form dissolving my environment, only leaving the visible monolith that was the brick house. Anytime I would see a bit of that mist appear I knew she was coming to me, my heart would then accelerate as shots of dopamine inundated my body. I would stand aimlessly staring up at her as her blank stare looked past me, I could still see tears forming in her eyes as she swayed back and forth. Her occasional blinks uplifting my soul, understanding whatever she was, she was something corporeal. Sometimes I would talk towards her, my words falling flat, letting out all of my anguish and frustration, but I still found it to be cathartic.
As I entered my final year of college something changed about the ‘woman in the window’, something I couldn’t explain. I was in my dorm room studying about psychological dependence when the all too familiar smell plagued my senses and I soon saw the mist flutter around me. I quickly closed my book and sat up right, licking the edges of my fingers pushing back my hair to a slick tidiness. My eager grin bursting through my skin as my heart throbbed with intensity and soon the house presented itself to me. My gaze crawling up to the bedroom window and that’s when my mouth gaped open with befuddlement, I rubbed at my eyes making sure I saw what I was witnessing.
Per the usual she stood still, unmoving, still smiling out to the void but this time her smile wasn’t as large as it usually was; the visible happiness sinking to a more dreadful reality. Now I could see tears clearly cascading down her cheeks, the edges built up to a point where it could no longer house the weight. That wasn’t the most disturbing part, no, for whatever reason I could see something protruding from the top of her forehead; it was small horns. I felt horrified at the bewildering display but I couldn’t look away, I stood there useless as always indulging in the sight of her presence.
These horrors only continued, me feeling dread whenever the mist would form, my heart sinking into the depths of my stomach, knowing it was time to see more monstrosities changing the woman I felt such a connection with. The horns only grew to ridiculous proportions as her body began morphing into anything other than a beautiful woman. I could no longer even tell if she was smiling, an expressionless grin embodied her face as her once blonde hair altered to a crimson red glow. The ‘woman in the window’ was slowly turning into a monster and all I could do was stare on with disbelief; still enamored with her presence.
As I entered the real world with college in the rear view mirror, I tried my best to escape the clutches of her grasp, running away anytime I would see the mist form; I don’t know why but I noticed the more I stayed busy is when she would stay away. I no longer desired to see her, each time feeling more disgusted after her visit. She slowly turned into something I couldn’t recognize, a creature of devilish magnitudes.
Around this time I stayed to myself no trying to make friends and definitely not trying to date. I just wanted to be left alone, I think “she” knew that; perhaps my loneliness is what she fed off of. I wanted to know if others could see her, if this curse was mine alone to conquer, so I scoured the internet asking people if they seen the ‘woman in the window’; but most were hesitant to answer. Sometimes I would get a message to my post, of how she has visited them but then nothing; the conversation would die. I was hoping for some sort of empathy or better community but I think most were too timid to admit they could see her.
On my 30th birthday she came to me while I was stuck in traffic, the mist blurring my vision almost causing me to crash, I pulled over to the side just wanting to get this visit over with, by this point she no longer resembled any form of her once self; the beauty that had captivated me when I was younger now gone and all that remained was some creature. Her eyes vacant of any life and the smile that made my heart beat with such vigor was now two times larger than it should of been. Either way I had no other choice, I had to look at her or she wouldn’t let me leave. My world was collapsing and everyday was more bleak than the day prior, I counted the days down as I got older; ready for this journey of mine to end. My life was on a hamster wheel, everything the same turning full circle each day, I think she knew how depressed I was and indulged in my misery.
By the time I had reached my 40th I had given up on any form of intimacy with others, my soul had been captured by the ‘woman in the window’ and I came to accept the eternal loneliness. It’s funny how we find ourselves on one path only for fate to direct you on another and by some miracle a familiar face found me, Amber. I hadn’t seen her since our last days of high school and she practically looked the same, still beautiful as the day I first met her. It was by chance that we had run into each other at the super market, I was gathering my usual, several boxes of mac n cheese when the mist began to form and before it took complete hold of me Ambers angelic voice called out to me, snapping me back to our reality.
Apparently she had just moved back, told me how I hadn’t aged a bit, I think most people would of picked up on the subtle flirting but I remained unmoved by the gesture and spoke to her in a monotone manner. My cold demeanor didn’t dissuade her though, she was genuinely happy to see me, told me she moved back because of her recent divorce; something about feeling the happiest here. I couldn’t explain why such a benevolent person would waste time on someone like me, but we exchanged numbers and began a friendship.
It didn’t take long for us to start dating, my heart awakening to her presence as if it had been dormant for the last two decades. I felt hopeful with Amber in my life, the vibrance of my world opening back up, presenting me with a breath of fresh air. Even though our connection was strong I still found it hard to be intimate, opening myself up was a thing hard to do after years of being a recluse, but deep down I knew why I couldn’t and it was because of ‘her’, the monster in the window.
‘She’ came to me one night while me and Amber slept; the scent of mist awakening me, I looked around the room confused as the daunting encounter began to unfold. Amber’s soft snoring fluttered in the air causing me to smile at her with such beguilement and I shut my eyes tightly trying to fend off the monsters presence but ‘it’ was relentless and soon I found myself standing in front of that abysmal brick house. I didn’t want to look at ‘it’, I tried my best to look away but it forced my gaze towards ‘it’, pulling my attention with all of it’s allure. It was more horrifying than ever, ‘she’ had grown several arms that resembled massive tentacles and they spiraled around grotesquely.
“No!” I screamed at it, my voice echoing through the haze of mist.
I needed to defeat this beast once and for all before it ruined my happiness with Amber and I clenched my fist furiously. Before I could even attempt to run towards the devil, ‘it’ did something I had never seen it do before and that was it looked down directly at me. I stood frozen with horror not sure what this meant, ‘she’ had finally acknowledged me after all these years, my hands relaxing back to an open palm as I continued staring on with amazement. ‘She’ then began to move uncontrollably, spasming her limbs like some ragged marionette, sending a chill down my spine as my gazed remained fixated on ‘her’.
To my horror the monster began to crawl out of the window, ‘it’s legs slithering down the wall like some nightmarish spider; the monster crawling closer to me as it gurgled out a horrid wheezing sound. I didn’t know what to do, I closed my eyes bracing myself for the terrifying impact and that’s when I heard Amber’s voice.
“What the hell?” my sweet Amber called out.
I turned to her standing behind me, horrified at what she was seeing and I weakly asked if she could see ‘her’ — the woman in the window. She quietly nodded her head up and down as she continued staring disgusted. I began sobbing, falling to my knees feeling defeated as I clutched onto Ambers legs pleading for her to run away. I tried telling her that I was cursed, that the ‘woman in the window’ was my torment for life, that she didn’t need to be tortured as I was. To my astonishment Amber pulled me up to her eye level grasping my face with her soft hands telling me that we were in this together, I could hear the monster behind me getting closer, the sounds of those tentacles slithering closer towards us. Amber then told me something I hadn’t heard before in my entire miserable life, she told me that she loved me.
I looked at her with tears slipping down my face, her emerald green eyes looking deep into my soul and I smiled telling her the same, pulling her into my embrace and that’s when the monster behind me squealed out in anguish as the slithering foot steps halted. Slowly the mist faded away and I found myself back in my room with Amber still holding me, I didn’t know how I knew, but in that moment I realized the curse was broken and I sensed that the ‘woman in the window’ was gone.
Me and Amber are happy now, I have fully opened up to her about my experience, she tells me that monsters sleep but never truly stay buried; that we must stay vigilant. It’s been years since I have seen the ‘woman in the window’ and me Amber are engaged to be married, though, I understand that ‘it’ lurks in the shadows ready to reappear in my life at any moment. My only advice to others, is if you ever see a beautiful woman in the window, don’t stare at it, just run because it could become a curse for life.