Legend has it that if you find the end of the rainbow, a leprechaun will give you a pot of gold and grant you one wish. The legend is true.
After a rainy day, I put on a pair of wellies and a coat and went outside to lock my chickens in for the night. It was still bright but I needed to be up early the next morning so I planned on going to bed early. After locking them in, I noticed a rainbow. I usually wouldn’t take much notice of rainbows but the end of the rainbow looked to be a few fields away from my backyard. I knew the farmer that owned them and he gave me permission to bring my dogs into the field for a good run around whenever I want. I went inside, grabbed the two leashes and called my dogs.
When we got to the first field, the field I needed to pass through to get to the field where the rainbow was. I let my dogs off their leashes and they started hopping around in the long wet grass like rabbits. While they were roleplaying as rabbits, I continued walking towards the field with the rainbow. When I got there, where the rainbow met the ground was a large pot filled to the brim with gold. I approached it and took a piece of gold out of the pot.
“Aye, laddy, Don’t ya touch my gold” said a voice coming from inside the pot
“Who said that?”
“I did”
Out jamp a small man with a large ginger beard, a dark green waistcoat and a dark green hat
“Are you a lep-….”
“Aye, ladday. Call me Brandon would ya”
“Nice to meet, you Brandon”
“Nice to meet ya too, laddy. So, since ya found the end of the rainbow, I guess I’ll have to give ya my gold. Grown fond of it I have”
“Really?”
“Aye. Ya also get one wish”
“Do I now?. The legends are true then”
“Aye they are. So what can I do for ya?”
I spent about 10 minutes thinking of what I should wish for.
Money? Nah. Fame? God no. Superpowers? Temping but nah.
Ah
Every day I always have someone come to my door looking for something, whether it be a drive somewhere, to help them cut grass and trim hedges, looking to borrow something I have or just calling in unannounced. They’d always call at the worst times too. I’d be just about to sit down and watch some television when I’d hear a knock on my door. Or I’d plan to sleep in late and my phone would ring at like half 7 in the morning. I’ve always cared about what people thought of me so I never asked for help in return or said “No” to them in fear I’d be seen as an arsehole.
“Brandon, I wish to have peace. I want to be able to relax without someone knocking on my door looking for something from me. I want nobody to ring my phone. I just want peace”
“Are ya sure laddy?”
“Positive”
“Alright then, laddy” He clicked his fingers “Starting from tomorrow, yal have peace forever more” and then vanished into thin air.
I called my dogs, went home, took off my wellies and sat on the couch to watch some television.
There was a knock on the door
“Fuck’s sake”
I opened the door, and my neighbour from a few doors down, an elderly woman was standing there
“Niall, love. I hate to ask this of you, but my telly Ariel fell down. Would you be able to put it back up for me?”
“Yeah, yeah, grand. I can’t wait until tomorrow. Give me two minutes, Mary”
“Thanks love”
I spent about 30 minutes trying to put her ariel back but once the job was done, I went back home, hopped into bed and fell asleep.
The next morning I woke up at 11 o’clock. My dogs were sitting at my bedroom door waiting to go out. were both still asleep at the end of the bed.
“Two minutes, boys”
I looked at my phone. There were no missed calls.
“Peace, finally”
I got dressed, left my dogs out to pee, put on the kettle to make a cup of tea and opened the fridge. Out of milk
“Bollox”
I sat into my car and made my way towards the village to get a carton of milk in the shop. The road was unusually quiet. I reached the village and there were no cars around, no youths hanging about, nobody. The shop was even closed. I dialed my friend’s number to ring him but
“Hello, this is Ryan. Please leave a message and I’ll get back to you. Thank you”
Ryan always picks up his phone. Even if the battery was dead, he’d still find a way to answer.
No cars, nobody hanging around, Ryan not answering, I knew there was something wrong. The leprechaun granted my wish too literally. I sat in my car having a panic attack.
“Did I just wish for everyone to disappear?. Innocent people, children, all gone. Because of me. I caused a world wide genocide”
I drove home again very slowly thinking about what I had just done. When I parked up in my driveway my dogs came to the door of the car to greet me.
“H-hey boys. A-t least I still have you two”
I went in home and laid on the couch staring at the ceiling
“I’m a bad person. I’m an evil man. Everyone’s gone because of my own stupidity, my own selfishness”. I laid there for hours. Then I heard my message tone beep. I quickly grabbed my phone. It was a message from Ryan.
“Hey lad, r u home??. I tried ringing u but it went to voicemail. I can hear ur dogs barking inside too”
My dogs weren’t barking. I ran to the door but there was no-one outside
“Are you there??” I replied back
“Ye. Where u?”
“I’m at the front door”
“No ur not. Stop messing”
“I am I swear. And my dogs weren’t barking”
“R u sure? Cus I can hear them barking”
I looked back at my dogs which were on the couch, now asleep
“Are you playing with me?”
“No”
“Swear down”
“I swear. What’s wrong with u??? U ok??”
“No”
“Why. Whats wrong??”
“There’s nobody here”
“I’m here. I’m still outside”
“No I mean, in the world”
“What do u mean”
“The only person here is me”
“I’m confused”
“What’s the village like? Is the shop open?”
“I passed through on the way here. It was as busy as it usually is and ye. The shops open, y??”
A shot of relief hit me. If Ryan could text me, and he said everything was normal, then I didn’t cause everyone to disappear. What’s going on then, I thought.
“I think. Um, I’m confused”
“Ur acting weird”
“Ring me”
“Ok…..it just went to voicemail”
“Try again”
“Still went to voicemail”
So he can text me and not ring me, I thought. I started thinking back at the wish I made. “I want to relax without someone knocking on my door. I want nobody to ring my phone”. I never said anything about people not texting my phone. He really did take my wish too literally. When I said “I want to relax without someone knocking on my door”, he must’ve transported me to a similar universe where I’m the only person. “I want nobody to ring my phone” And he must’ve made it so people can’t ring me, or I ring them, but since I never mentioned anything about people texting me, I can still text people and they can still text me.
“Um, you’re probably gonna think I’m crazy, but I think I’ve been sent to another universe or something”
“Ya ur crazy”
“No really. Do me a favour. Break into my house, take the two dogs and mind them for me”
“Stop messin”
“Seriously. I need you to do this for me”
“Niall, I’m worried about u now. Where r u? I can get you help”
“I told you”
“Stop messin. I’m serious. Ur my best friend, you know that. I don’t want to lose you. So please, tell me where u are”
“I’ve told you”
“Answer my phone”
“I can’t. I can only text”
“Please answer. Please. U can talk to me. U always can talk to me. U should’ve talked to me about it before. Tell me where u are. I’ll come right away. We can hang out. Get takeaway. Watch movies”
Shit. He thinks I’m about to kill myself. There’s no way I’ll be able to convince him
“Fine. The truth is, I’ve left for another country. I didn’t want to tell you because I knew you’d try to convince me to stay. I took a taxi to the airport early this morning. I promise you, no I swear to you I’m not about to do anything stupid, well anything else stupid. I just want you to mind my two dogs for me and I promise I’ll text you every day”
“I don’t believe u. What country did u go to then??”
“Africa”
“That’s a continent. Where in Africa”
“South Africa”
“Why won’t u answer the phone?””
“My phone’s not working properly”
“Send me a pic then”
Oh yeah. Why didn’t I think of that. Maybe if I send him a picture or a video, he’ll believe me
I took a picture of my dogs sleeping on the couch. A picture of my my front garden where he said he was and I took a video
“As you can see, you’re not here, my dogs are asleep and not barking, there’s no cars on the road and I am actually not in South Africa”
“Is that pre-recorded???? If this is a prank it’s not funny”
“No, it was just taken there. I swear”
“Hmmm. So what did u say was going on”
“I think I’ve been sent to an alternate universe or something. I made a wish to some leprechaun and this is what happened”
“Leprechaun??”
“Yeah. At the end of the rainbow. He gives you gold and grants you a wish”
“Like the stories”
“Yeah, pretty much”
“And you swear ur not about to kill urself”
“I SWEAR”
“And u swear u’ll text me all the time?”
“Yes I swear”
“Ok. I’m going to look for this leprechaun then and get him to bring you back”
“You believe me then”
“I don’t know. But you better keep texting me”
“Good. Good. Also, Be very careful when making a wish. He takes them literally”
“Ok”
“I won’t stop reminding you”
It took two years before he finally got close to the end of the rainbow. He texted me
“Prepare to come home”
And then I never heard from him again. I tried texting him over and over and over again but he didn’t reply. A few days later, I received a message from one of the people I used to do stuff for
“Hi. I never saw you at Ryan’s funeral and I tried ringing you but there was no answer. How’ve you been holding up?”
“Funeral??”
“Yeah, weren’t you there??”
“No. Ryan’s dead??”
“Yeah, he died in a car accident the other day. Oh you poor thing, nobody told you??”
“No”
“Oh no, I’m so sorry. It must be hard finding out this way. Did nobody text you or ring you??”
“No”
“They must’ve thought somebody told you”
“They thought wrong”
“I’m so sorry. If I knew nobody told you I would’ve”
“Well it’s too late now isn’t it”
“Yeah, well, you could always make it to his month’s mine couldn’t you?? Show your respects there”
“I can’t”
“Can’t you book a few days off work and book a flight over??”
“I said I can’t”
“Why not though? He was your best friend. I’m sure your boss will understand and if you can’t afford a flight over, I can pay for it. You’ve done so much for me, it’s the least I can do”
“I said I can’t, Siobhán, okay. I can’t. If I could, I would. But I CAN’T”
“Fine. Okay. I was just trying to help. Again, I’m sorry for your loss and I wish you the best”
I cried for almost a week straight. Not only because Ryan was gone, but because I was truly alone. My dog’s were good company but they hadn’t long left either. One was 12 at the time, the other 10. For the first time in those two years, I really did consider suicide. I never could go through with it though.
It’s been 5 years since I made that wish. The two dogs are gone. One passed away from old age, the other passed away when he got sick and I had no vet to bring him to. I’ve been spending my days just travelling the country, visiting places people aren’t allowed to visit and trying to enjoy the peace I had wished for all those years ago, but it’s hard. I downloaded different apps to text people but they just don’t do it. It’s not the same. I quickly grew to miss those people knocking on my door and ringing me to do things for them. If I could make another wish, I’d wish for my life to go back to the way it was before, but I don’t think that’ll ever happen. In those 5 years, there hasn’t been one drop of rain so there’s been no rainbow. I’ve noticed lately I’ve been starting to hallucinate, seeing people that aren’t there. I fear in another few years, the constant loneliness will make me go crazy altogether. If it wasn’t for the fact I can still communicate with people from the real world through text, I think I would’ve gone completely crazy long ago.
If you’re reading this and you find the end of the rainbow at some point in your life, bring me back. Please. I’ve never been one to ask for help before, but I want to come home.