My father was always a very secretive man. Every time I asked him something about our family, or his job or any thing to do with him, the words were, “I’ll tell you when your older”, or, “It doesn’t matter” and sometimes he wouldn’t answer me at all. When I was younger, he told me that my mum left us when I was a baby and that she was a very bad woman. Now that I’ve gone through his diary, I know the full story.
We lived like spies all my life. We lived in a cabin deep in the woods and my father homeschooled me. Once a month, a box would drop at our house. This was our groceries. I saw the outside world once in real life. The rest was all on the Internet, which I used sparingly due to my father. We had one radio and we only listened to classical music and sometimes news, but that was rare.
I often wondered what life was like on the outside, and why we had to live like this. But my father was quick to shut down conversations like this.
One day, when i was 15, my father said he was doing something important and he was leaving for the outside world for a couple of days. He gave me a strict set of rules to follow and to not go into the basement or his study. I obviously was curious and decided to break those rules. He left that afternoon and as soon as he was out of range, I went upstairs to his study. There was a lock on the door, but it was quite easy to unlock. I now had access to his study and the first thing I looked at was his diary. That was the moment everything changed.
According to my father, my mother left us. But the truth is, my mother didn’t leave us. She cheated on my dad and my dad took it so seriously, he killed her and then raped her dead body before harvesting her organs to sell on the black market. My jaw dropped when I read that. My whole life had been a lie. My mother was dead? I couldn’t believe it. My heart told me to stop but my brain told me to keep going. So I did.
In the diary, I also had a two year old sister who was quite fussy, so my crazy father decided to Bury her alive in a titanium casket. Obviously she didn’t survive and she died.
My brain was still trying to comprehend all of this. I had a dead mother and sister which my father killed? I kept flicking through the pages and I also found out that the special soup my dad cooked for me was made out of human meat.
At that point, I’d had enough. I got a backpack and filled it with some clothes, my laptop, and some water. I was leaving and leaving for good. I went downstairs to the door. It was locked. At that point, I heard footsteps, and I turned around to see my dad. He was hiding in the basement and didn’t want to see me. A crowbar was in his hand and I didn’t know what to do.
“Didn’t I tell you not to go in the study boy?” Questioned my dad.
“You’re a monster!” I screamed. “Why did you do those things to mom and sister!”
“That was none of your business!” He said as he lunged at me with his crowbar.
I defended my self by grabbing a pillow from our couch. I pushed him away onto the floor. I ran into the kitchen as he chased after me, screaming. I grabbed a knife and he hit me on my head. I dashed to the door and ran outside with my backpack into the woods.
I’m now living with a guy named Carlos in the city. He’s great, but I can’t help but live in fear every day. Long story short, he found my email address and has been sending threatening emails to me and honestly, I’m scared.
Thank you all for listening to me, I feel like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders just by writing this.