Sunlight slanted through the cracks in the warm tan stone, playing over gnarled roots in way that belays a peace I do not feel. Nervous chatter flows around me, Stephen, Max. Olivia, Jenna. Simon. I cross my arms tight, swaying a little as I stare at the bright blue gaps in the rough ceiling of the cave where I can see sky. I wish I had never come. It was the right thing to do, I know that. I think I know that. I also know this: only one of us will still be standing come tomorrow morning.
Max says it will be Simon. He thinks Simon is the strongest, the smartest. The most capable of following the Rules. Frankly he may be right. Olivia is to quick to act, driven by her impulses and fiery temper. Stephen: too soft, struggles with sacrifice. Then there’s me; often forgetful and easily paralyzed in crisis.
I would die for anyone here-but there’s only one I’d die without and that’s Jenna. I run my hands over my freshly shaved head, courtesy of Jenna, feeling the softness like a fawn’s ear. For a moment, I remember our cabin, warm brown walls smelling of cedar, and of safety. My hair looped in Jenna’s long fingers, falling around me like feathers from a bird in moult.
How light and free I felt, how safe, especially with Jenna by my side. I don’t feel that way now. Max says, when we’re afraid we have to review the Rules. So.
Rule 1: The Monster in the Caves is dangerous, and if it ever grows tired of its craggy walls and enters the outside world many will die. Therefore: one of us must kill it, before our inevitable deaths.
Rule 2: In order for the Monster to die (and stay dead) all but one of us must perish. (As you can imagine, this isn’t really one I’m fond of)
Rule 3: Speak to no one, outside of those who have traveled with you. They may try to convince you of one or more of the following things: that the Monster isn’t real, that it doesn’t need to be exterminated, or even that it is just some feral dog. Ignore them, as they are in league with It.
Rule 4: You must not run. It may claw and rip and tear you but you must fight.To run is cowardly and shows the creature you are unworthy.
Rule 5: The Monster must be fought within the Caves. If It were to be led to the fields outside, all is truly lost.
Rule 6: The one who kills the monster must return to the world and tell of the beasts defeat, whereupon they shall be welcomed as a leader and honored highly. After a few tense hours readying ourselves for the night, we sit in a circle passing around provisions pulled from our knapsacks. We don’t have to worry about attracting danger. It already knows we’re here.
I can tell from the occasional rustle, little pebble showers. A shadow creeping across the rocky walls. I gingerly nibble at some jerky, and then force some cheese when Jenna shoots me a stern look. My heart is racing in my chest like a jackrabbit; my senses catalogue each breath of wind from outside and every flittering moth darting across the yellow lantern light.
Dusk fades fully into dark without an appearance from the Monster, so we slip into our sleeping bags. We say nothing to each other. What is there to say? We leave the lantern on, and when Max isn’t looking I drag my sleeping bag to Jenna’s side, rest my head on her shoulder, breathe in her scent of lilies.
Her hand clasps mine. We wait. Somehow, for a few minutes, (or hours for all I know), sleep takes me. It’s to Stephen’s whimpered cries that I wake-he’s huddled over a motionless dark heap, just inside the golden ring of lantern light. The sounds that escape him are high pitched keenings like a wounded animal. I sit up slowly. “Stephen?” I ask warily.
He turns to me, eyes red rimmed from tears. Cradled gently in his arms is Olivia. Her eyes stare at nothing, her face, usually alive with enthusiasm and that particular hint of bossiness-registers nothing but terror. Dark blood seeps from her mangled neck and with a gasp, I see a spike of bright white that could only be bone. I’m shaking. I don’t think I can stand. Stephen’s shrill cries soon wake the others and Max goes to crouch beside Olivia, inspecting her destroyed body. Suddenly Olivia’s eyelashes flutter and her chest heaves upwards and I realize with a sickening lurch that, somehow, she’s still alive.
Her dilated gray eyes flick about, latching on to Max’s worried ones. In that moment her eyes seemed to convey nothing but desperation, and soul crushing pain. Max gives her a kind smile, cups her head in his hands. He’s still smiling as he sharply twists her head to one side with an awful crack and when she falls fully limp. I scream and Simon tackles me to the ground, covering my mouth. I don’t fight him; Simon is stronger and besides, he’s Max’s favorite.
“Let her up” Max says sternly, gazing at me. His eyes are twin pools promising glory and salvation for the worthy-and damnation for the unworthy. He clicks his tongue, shaking his head. “You know she wasn’t going to live through that, Kaitlyn…this is a kindness.” I nod shortly, throat choking with sobs. Simon releases me and Jenna scoops me up, glaring sharply at at him. Stephen’s eyes are empty. Olivia was everything to him, he cared for us all of course but Olivia… Olivia was special to him. Everything is so terribly real now.
I’m going to watch Stephen die, and Max, and Simon, and Jenna, or they’ll watch me die, either through Max’s ‘mercy’ or the Monster’s teeth and claws. It isn’t going to be quick and there will be no glory-just pain. Just fear.
What do I do? I can hear it, waiting in the shadows. I know what I should do… What I’ve been trained to do. Follow the Rules. And yet. Stephen’s eyes, his eyes. That can’t be me, can’t be Jenna… How will I ever make it out? How will she?