“So, look we have to ask you a few questions before we even considering sending you back, okay?”* The scientist said in an enthusiastic but yet weary voice. He asked some what I’m guessing were protocol questions.
“You know what period you’re being sent to?” I nodded, “The Roman Empire.” “Not just the Roman Empire! You’re going to the end of the Crisis of the Third Century, there’s a lot you need to know and remember.” He huffed but I just continued to listen in silence. “Remember, your Latin is ecclesiastic, not Roman. It differs a bit but it’ll give you the foundations to get by. Just avoid talking about God. The Romans really didn’t like the Christians at this point.”
“Is that it?” I looked at the now team of scientists messing around on computers, giant screens, writing things down. The now unarranged book shelves which they forced me to read front to back and back to front to ensure I wouldn’t alter the timeline, to ensure I would blend in and survive.
“Okay, look we won’t lie. The museums also didn’t like sponsoring this trip so you will have very little money, just whatever coins we could find in recent archaeological digs that we may or may not have reported to the other wings of the government. I won’t snitch if you don’t.” He let out a small chuckle, more like a nervous wheeze more so than anything.
“Finally, upon arrival within the Eternal City, find somewhere private. I have included a set of rules for survival in your coin purse. It’s double-sided. One side is the societal rules you must obey within the Eternal City. One side is to optimise your experience.”
Rules to optimise my experience? Probably should’ve told me these while I was preparing all these months, reading and doing language classes. But, okay, maybe it was a last minute oversight. I followed the scientists to the machine. A towering, mechanical, mess. Nothing on it makes sense. But hey, at least I won’t have to do anything, I’m not the brains.
A countdown from 10 later and with a loud flash, I awoke with what felt to be the worst hangover ever. A stomach that felt like a washing machine and a headache that felt like a 2 inch drill bit was penetrating my temple.
I spent a while laying down to compose myself, only after I’d say five or so minutes did I actually bother to stand up and begin walking down the alleyway I found myself in. A beautiful city emerged in front of me as I stood into the light, beautiful homes with elegant pots outside their doors and windows, a beauty of the ancient Latin language landed upon my ears, chants of “Christiani Delenda Est” filled what looked like the Aventine hill if my memory served correct. I walked over to one of the pots outside a home and filled my hands with liquid inside only to splash my face. The overwhelming and potent stench of urine filled my nose and everyone around me began to give me death glares. I immediately knew my mistake.
Fuck it, I decided, I shall explore this beautiful city as much as possible. I visited the pubs, the fast food stalls, the forums, but then I remembered the money problem. So I just travelled to the nearest bath house I could and sat down at a bench. A man approached and immediately introduced himself.
“What province are you from? It is easy to spot you outsiders, the amazement on your face tells your story.” I looked to him and laughed. “My father is Vandal, my mother is from the civilised province of Dalmatia. And I guess you are from this city? My name is…” I paused… “Iovius.”
“Well… Iovius… I am Aper, born during the Consulship of Virtorinus and the glorious Imperator Caesar Marcus Aurelius Probus Augustus of his fifth Consulship. I am an Aedile within the senate, how about I show you more of our city my friend? Show you the glory that your barbarian father resisted all those years ago.”
I paused once again, slowly but surely translating his words one by one. As the vocabulary swirled around my mind I couldn’t help but noticed the features of Aper. A lighter skinned man than most here, blue eyes. His hair was styled just like anyone else’s. But something just seemed off.
“Sure, lead me through the city that your ancestors have built.” I wondered, should I make the joke. I couldn’t resist. “Was it really built in a day?” Aper just looked back at me and smiled. Woah.. The Romans really were arrogant and superstitious I assume. After a long day he brought me to his home, we ate and he brought me to a bed to sleep in. I thanked him and only then did I remember the note in my coin purse.
I looked at side A.
I just turned the page over before finishing the rest. Did they really not trust me to remember the societal rules of Rome? Side B was more… Sinister.
I began pondering the last two “rules.” Aper has blue eyes. His age… I mean… I don’t know! I don’t know who was consul for every year, Victorinus? Who has he? I knew of Probus but he had so many reigns as Consul. It is then the door slowly pushed itself open, a swords gleam behind the shadow only reflected by the candle carried alongside it. It finally sunk in… Aper..
Writers note: Since I’m too lazy to answer potential questions about Aper. Aper is Latin for “The boar.” I know the ending is rushed but it’s my first story so hopefully plenty of potential to grow. Also the year of the consulship Aper was born took place exactly 20 years before the events of this story. Implying he was the first subject. Implying he was one step ahead of the protagonist