It was an day like any other day, neither the best day, neither the worst, just another completely normal day I have finished my work and left to get my daughter from school.
It shouldn’t have taken more than 10 minutes, since I don’t work too far away from his school,but there has been an car accident, so I was stuck in traffic for an while.
The police came to my my window, I was expecting them to ask me something, but they didn’t, they just stared in my soul for what felt like an hour, then left, gone to the car behind me and did the same thing for all the other cars.
People were getting mad, I think it has been an hour, among the symphony of car engines and horns, I heard my phone ringing, it was an unknown number, I have answered with hesitation, then, I have found out
Hello sir
The voice sounded shaky, it gave me goosebumps for some reason, I knew something was going wrong, I felt it
Hello
We are sorry to inform you about this, your wife and kid has been involved in an car crash
That moment I looked in the mirror, I saw myself becoming white as an ghost, all life leaving my body, I knew it was bad, really bad,
Are they alright! I said not even giving her time to finish
No sir, they died on place
I didn’t let her finish, I closed the call, there was no way, this couldn’t happen. I left my car and ran to the car crash
It was horrible, blood everywhere, pieces meat, of what were once my wife and daughter were embedded into the metal wrecked thing that was once an car, I fainted on the sight
I woke up in the hospital, confused and scared, there was no one around, so I left quickly, unnoticed
I never ran this fast, I have gotten inside my car, and drove home in an few minutes, not even thinking that I might hurt someone
I got home stopped the car I the middle of the road, got down and then entered
I was in shock, I started crying , ran to my daughters room and to her bed, there was laying her favorite plush, some old teared up pink bear, with one eye teared off, I held it close to my chest, laid on the bed,
It was only my fault, only my fault, I knew I should ve told her to stay home, I knew it I forgot to tell her I was going to pick Eliz up from school, I saw her, she was acting weird,I think it might have been her depression, I was not the best husband, but I tried, I tried to be there for her, it looks like I was not enought
All these thoughts rumbling trough my head, I couldn’t take it, and fell asleep, not that I was tired, but because of the fact that it was easier than to deal with all the pain that way
I woke up, an eerie cold air was filling the room, I was feeling like I couldn’t breath, I have gone to the bathroom and looked in the mirror, still an pale ghost, this was wrong
I have gone down the stairs, on my way to the police station when I saw them, they were alive, and well, They just acted like nothing happened, I did too, but I am certain it was not an dream, but hey, I m not complaining
I sat there in silence, and ate breakfast with them, the eerie ambience was still in the air, actually, it was worse, something was wrong, I could feel it
I didn’t go to to work that day, I followed them around, to make sure everything was fine, and I was
I got home and lied to them that I was at work, thankfully It worked I got in the bathroom, I was looking the same, pale and on the verge of my sanity
I looked in the mirror deeply, so deep I could state into my soul, then I realised, they shouldn’t be alive, they should be dead, even if it looks like fate wants them alive, I know, I know they should be dead
I got in the kitchen and picked up the biggest knife, stared at it for an while, my reflection in the blade of the knife was looking different, I was smiling, like it was the best day of my life
I got inside my daughter s room, I don’t even remember how I did it, it happened quickly, she didn’t even get to fight
Wiped the blood off the knife and Hid it behind my back
Now it was time for my wife, I opened the door gently, she stared trough me blankly, I noticed the gun under her pillow, she still wanted to die, just like last time, huh? I rushed to stab her in the chest, but I was too slow, she threw the knife out of my hand and I rushed to the gun, I got it!
She stared blankly in my eyes, didn’t say an word the whole time, her hand was covered in blood, she must’ve cut herself when she threw the knife away
Her survival instinct saved her this time
I pointed the gun at her, and pulled the trigger The moment I shot her it all turned black, like I was the one to get killed
I woke up in an cold sweat again, in my room, nothing changed, they were all sitting at the same table, with the same eerie feeling
Did the same thing multiple times, it didn’t work Tried to let them live, and they would always die I tried to save them, them, and guess what, I was the one to die
HELL,In the end, I tought about killing myself, and I did it, the blood was pudding beneath me, my wrist being cut so bad it looked like it was gonna fall off, I deserved the pain, did all that to just wake up again in my bed
I did it again and again and again, all the times it I woke up back here, I tried many things, killed them in so many ways I can’t even count,I tried to let them live, but something would always come up, something fatal, either for them, or for me, and I would wake up back home
I am sorry, i regret killing her now, I didn’t even want to kill the kid, I tought I was the one wo s gonna pick her up from school, not her. I couldn’t stand another day watching her hurt herself, me, and the kid, I cut her brakes, I regret it
I wanted her dead, she wanted herself dead, I just couldn’t live another day watching her destroy the people around her, she was absent of my life, out of my kid’s life, I was so mad I just did it
I want to just keep living
I am right now praying to any God that may or may not exist to forgive me, even though I did this before, maybe I will be awarded with forgiveness, or maybe not,
Now that I think about it, what if there is no way out, what if this is hell, and maybe, there is no god to pray to, so I just stopped caring,
I don’t even try to get out of bed anymore,each time it resets, either cause they die in another crash or something, either cause I die, just like them, for the eternity